Husband taking a trip after daughter had accident

[36londonmum]

My daughter fell over and really injured herself, so is unable to get around without any kind of assistance. My husband had booked a golf trip with his friends prior to this happening and he still wants to go and leave me with both kids for nearly a week. It’s going to be extremely difficult for me to juggle all school pick ups and everything else that entails! I work full time and have a side job. I really wanted to know, AIBU?!

LTB. Why wouldn't he want to be there for his injured little girl? Imagine the other way around? Would you be swanning off and leaving your poorly daughter and other two with your husband for a week?

No way!!!!

Imagine being that shit of a dad that you'd rather go golfing with your mates than be there to help your injured child.
Waste of oxygen!

I wouldn't be happy... I'd think he was a shit father and husband tbh.

Presumably you’d be doing the pick ups etc anyway, even without the accident? She’s no more immobile than if she were a smaller toddler, so I’m not sure what all the fuss is. Why wouldn’t you want him to go on his long-planned trip? Wouldn’t your daughter feel guilty that she was the reason he would have to stay? (Even though it sounds like YOU’D be the reason. For which YABVU)

The drama some people make out of the smallest things! Calm down.

Other two?

OP clearly states she has two DC. I'm amazed how often people get things wrong on here.

He’s a really shit dad. I’m quite stunned at this tbh.

Honestly am bemused by some of the responses on here. I wouldn't have had to ask my DH to forgo a trip away in such circumstances - he would have prioritised being a dad.

Note to self: never take up golf, it’s a sport for arseholes.

Yes which is what I am being told by him. So why I’m asking as totally fine to accept if I am being unreasonable!

It’s more of a physical thing where I currently have to carry her out of chair up stairs into house and into bed etc. and also wait on her hand and foot!!

At 5, 6 & 7, it sounds as if you'd have been doing all the school pickups while he was away anyway. Yes, more of a faff because your daughter is injured, but she'd hardly have been walking home on her own if she'd not had the accident.

Would my DH leave me to deal with a full time job, a part time job, a six year old and a five year old that probably needs help every couple of minutes with toileting, fetching things, stairs, discomfort etc?

Hell no, not unless it was essential for work. Partly because he’s involved enough with our children and their care to know damn well he wouldn’t want me to do it to him!

Exactly this!

Any man who doesn’t put his child before a hobby is a really crappy dad.

I’m really sorry op. You must be so disappointed in him. At a time when you really need him to step up he has seriously let you down. Both you and your children deserve better.

YANBU

Why would you presume that?

I didn’t want to add because not sure if relevant but it’s also over our wedding anniversary, which he said was fine because we never celebrate anyway :(

You’ve not really read the thread properly have you?

Okay I've moved from LTB to you need a new patio.

Accident aside, who gets to go on a week long holiday alone when you’ve 2 small kids at home? I’d be raging about that alone 😂

She's not poorly she has a broken leg it's not something you cancel a trip for its unfortunate but not a massive deal

My DH wouldn't leave me with this.

And we both go away without the other.

But what exactly is he going to be doing if he’s at home? People with broken legs don’t need 24 hours care from two people. She needs a more bit more fetching of things than previously, and she needs some help manoeuvring about and possibly washing. That’s not a full time caring responsibility for two people is it?

And if it is, then the OP just needs to communicate this with him, tell him she’s really unhappy about him going (though it sounds like what she’s ACTUALLY unhappy about is the wedding anniversary) and then have a conversation with him instead of moaning to us.

Do you celebrate it usually? Do you want to?

It’s hard coordinating multiple friends’ diaries for big trips like this with work commitments, medical appointments, pre booked family holidays - start to throw in wedding anniversaries and the like and they’d probably never get a date fixed! I wouldn’t be remotely bothered about the anniversary missing part of this, which presumably you knew about and agreed to when he booked the trip? Or did he just book it and drop it on you as a fait accompli?

I'm surprised by some of the responses. The girl is only 5! I wouldn't have to ask my DH, he would stay home.