MIL said I embarrassed her in front of her family. WIBU?

[Bigredjumper]

Ar the weekend, my partner and I hosted a family get together for his mother, aunt, cousin and her husband and children. I offered to cook for the get together.

A few weeks before, his cousin messaged saying that she is trying to cut UPFs from her children's diet and asked me to let her know if this would be an issue so she could bring good food with her. I thanked her for letting me know and we agreed I'd run everything past her to make sure she was comfortable with her children eating it. I enjoy cooking so I had absolutely no issue with this; I want to reduce the amount of UPFs I eat anyway.

I decided to make fajitas three ways (chicken, steak and halloumi). The only things I could think of which might not be okay were:

Dried herbs/spices
Cathedral city cheese
Sour cream
Tomato paste (from a local deli, not the tomato puree in a tube)
Oliver oil (from the same deli)

Partner's cousin assured me these were fine for her and her family. I made the tortillas myself, and the meat came from a local butchers. I also made sweet potato fries and a big mumsnetty salad.

I thought the get together went well and everyone seemed to enjoy the food.

My partner's mother text me today saying she cannot believe I thought it was okay to serve her family such junk food. She said I'd embarrassed her and my partner in front of her sister and I should think long and hard before agreeing to host anyone again.

I couldn't believe what I was reading. My partner and his cousin have assured me that there was absolutely nothing wrong with what I served and to ignore her. But I can't stop thinking I did something wrong and should have served something healthier. Especially considering there were children.

So WIBU? Apologies this is so long!

But it sounds like the MIL meant it that way: “ informal food, eaten with fingers like chips or burger.” I think that’s what she meant . Im not sure the MIL drafted her rant with the aid of a dictionary.

I don't think MiL drafted her rant with any manners, civility or even basic decency.

She basically a wildly out of touch snob who is stuck in some silly, frilly, pompous , last century interpretation of formality and probably a teeny bit bewildered at how well OP's meal was received, to boot.

People, don't be like OP's MiL!!!!

Ummm… but you’re the one who just unleashed a torrent of abuse … which I thought was what we were condemning MIL for?

Ummm… but you’re the one who just unleashed a torrent of abuse … which I thought was what we were condemning MIL for?

Nope I'm declaring MiL unbearably rude and ungrateful with very bad manners.

I mean you can try and make out I'm somehow as bad 😂👍🏻

“It’s just the way you do that thing you do!”😂

Yeast is a natural product and has no emulsifier in it.
the emulsifiers used are there to bind far and water to make the mouth feel good and to keep the bread soft for long where a natural bread would dry out

sorry in reply to whoever quoted my first comment

The food sounds perfect, you're so thoughtful OP. No one else had an issue other than MIL so I'd just reply "sorry failing to see issue here, I ran it past aunt who was happy with everything, everyone ate and was happy, take care"

Forward the message to everyone in your family and say ‘MIL has pointed out what a failure my meal was and I just wanted to say to everyone how sorry I am. I won’t attempt to cater again, and have retired from cooking for my own family after embarrassing myself like this’. DH can then take up the cooking at home until he steps the hell up and gives his mum the hell she deserves - if other members of the family don’t get there first.

I quite like this!

Tho I think DH hadn’t complained (?) so I’d maybe leave out the bit about not cooking at home. Personally I was thinking I’d apologise and let MIL hear the absurdity of that, but hadn’t thought of cc’ing the others!

This is horribly PA, but most effective.😁

Let her be hoisted by her own petard.

I like it (evil 😀)

Why are recent posters having a go at the OP's partner?

She said explicitly that her partner is furious with his mother and has made it clear to her that she isn't welcome in their house.

I expect it's because it wasn't 'knife and fork' food. It sounds delicious and it sounds like it was very well received. Just don't cook for the ungrateful moo again.

Op, did you find out what the actual reason for the outburst is?

I don't think I've read a thread for years that makes me stand with my hand on my hips and mouth wide open completely shocked. Well done for blocking her OP.

She's off her rocker!

We are having exactly the same food tonight and it is healthy and delicious! Fresh meat and veg, nothing from a packet and minimal carbs. I think what she means by 'junk' is 'foreign muck'. Does she have a habit of eating only English foods? Or is she a 3 course meal is the only way to entertain sort? Either way bloody rude. If no one else had an issue i would tell her everyone else loved it and it was only her with the issue so best she doesnt come around again because you'll be serving more of the same.

What a bitch, sorry you have to deal with that. Dont let it get to you though, she's clearly bonkers.