to expect dd to tolerate her brothers playing while she's trying to sleep?

[Mastmw7g]

My 10 year old likes to sleep late, but her brothers wake up early and play in the mornings. They make noise when they play. I think it's a good thing because they're spending time together and not on screens. But dd keeps getting upset that they wake her up. Then she comes out of her room and it starts a fight and dh gets upset because that wakes him up and he also likes to sleep late.

This seems extremely easy to solve - just have a weekend morning basket with some toys in, take it to the sitting room and shut the door. When she's awake, return toys and boys to normal place. Done.

So you've actually got four children? Maybe get him a gro clock so he knows when he should go to sleep?

8 is fine. Maybe make a rule that it can't be loud play til 9 at weekends?

The compromise is moving your sons to another room or screens and headphones until 10 am.

My husband and older daughter who is 13 like to sleep in. My younger daughter likes to rise with the sun! Quiet until 9ish and then every man for himself here. I like older daughter to get 10 hours quiet if possible. Now just to get the sleep I need between one going to bed at 11 and the other getting up at 6...

I think there should be a no yelling and shouty play till 9.

I had the other way round as a kid. 9 and 6 year age gap between my DBs and me. When I was about 5 or 6 I went to bed at 7 and my oldest DB would be up till around 10.30. They both had friends over in the evenings, and grown-up and teenagers lives were what I fell asleep to. There was no concession at all to me being much younger. As a consequence I have never been able to get to sleep unless there’s some noise. It takes very loud noise to wake me in the morning too. I’d insist on quieter play in the morning and an earlier bedtime for DD.

@MyCousinDaphne Yes, my 12 year old rises at 5am. He's very quiet, but it still wakes me up when I hear his feet on the floor. It doesn't become a problem until my 6 year old wakes up. I've learned from this thread that I have to find a way to make things quieter for her.

A bit odd you all get up so late and at different times on the weekends. Getting up at 10-11am makes you lose half the day! We all get up when DS 22 months gets up. DS 7 sometimes sleeps in till 7am if I manage to keep the toddler quiet enough until then. It’s a bit unreasonable to expect your boys to be quiet until 10am imo.

I'd have some sympathy if they were playing at 6am but 8am is just normal awake time. I wouldn't expect anyone to be creeping around at that time, it's normal household noise. The people who want to sleep in late need earplugs.

Pfft my DD11 sleeps until lunch on a weekend, it's very normal for some children.

Op can you compromise, either Sat or Sun, they get to lie in without being woken... mine sleeps through anything.

That's not what I'm reading! Give her some ear plugs!

Just let them take toys (I’d let them have one toy) away from the area in front of the bedrooms.

10am might be late, but it’s not obscenely so and she’s a member of the household, it won’t do them any harm to respect the fact she and your DH do things differently, at least some of the time.

10am is quite late. I’d expect the other children to keep noise down til about 8-8.30 at weekends, but I’m quite shocked that a 10 year old wants to sleep til that late.

As a child I found every day off school so fun that I was up early (could have happily slept in on school days!). Perhaps she could try getting up at 9am?

@Whiteday The poll is saying I'm being unreasonable, which has given me a lot to think about.

That's half the fay gone. Do none of them have hobbies / clubs at the weekend? Don't you have days out?

Your dh is being selfish leaving everything to you, but you need to prevent fighting especially since it is that regular.

the ten year old needs to be asleep earlier.
the 12 year old needs to be firmly told 5am is not a time he can get out of bed.

Kids up playing at 10 the morning is. Them
fighting is not.

Are you now saying it’s DH that’s wants to sleep in and is complaining.

DD 10 needs more sleep. She needs to go
to bed earlier.

What a waste of a weekend staying in bed until 10!
I thought you were going to say her brothers were up at 5-6am.
Your 10 year old needs to go to bed earlier.
Your husband needs to shift his arse and get up and involved with his children.

I'm on the app, the replies don't indicate YAVU!

What's the pool bites?

Ignore the poll. You dont know what people mean when they answer. It could be yabu to allow this to continue.

*poll votes!

I have an early riser, a mid riser, and me who gets up early in the week (like really early - I work quietly in my room until 6am early) but would like a lie-in on a sunday (only talking till 8am - but that's a lie-in for me)

The rule is that you're considerate if someone's still asleep. Eldest (the early riser unfortunately) is generally good, but once me or DS2 wakes up, he struggles not to be happy to see us and keep his voice down, and he's not very good at getting up quietly and carefully so if it's only moderately early he can wake his brother too. But we try, and we keep reminding and trying.

I think they should play more quietly downstairs and away from her room. Nothing wrong with a child having a bit of a lie in at the weekends and her brothers could be a bit less noisy and more considerate.

@SusanKennedyshouldLTB Oh, I don't have a problem with my 12 year old waking so early. He's quiet and puts himself to bed early to accommodate for an early start. I tried at one point to say 6am was a more appropriate time to wake, but dh disagreed and said 5am was fine as long as he's quiet.

Why are you so precious about your "D"H's sleep? Being woken up is part of having children. If he's tired, he can go to bed earlier like the rest of the world does.

I'm going to hazard a guess that he wasn't heavily involved in dealing with night wakings when your kids were small?

Send your daughter to bed at a decent time and tell diddums to get some ear plugs if he's too precious to deal with the noise of family life in the morning.

The boys should not be screaming or shrieking, but absolutely they shouldn't have to creep about in their own house at 8am and should be able to play normally.

How does your eldest cope with school if he is such an early riser?

Does your DH do parenting? When the DC were younger did he still lie in until 11?