Husband ill, but messing up house

[Mumof118]

Husband is poorly. A bad cold. Temperature. Sinuses all stuffed up. Headache etc. I leave him on the sofa and clean the house without him today, letting him rest.

I finish cleaning and he decided to get showered and dressed. Decides to shave in the freshly cleaned bathroom getting hairs everywhere. Doesn’t since the soap suds off the bath screen so the bubbles are drying to the glass.

Comes upstairs, sits on the bed to put his socks on. Doesn’t straighten up the bed and then walks across the carpet leaving tiny black bits of old sock.

Goes into en-suite and brushes his teeth, getting toothpaste spit droplets all over the mirror and shower door. Leave wet towel hanging over my display white towels.

Now I feel really angry. Took me ages on my day off to do all of the cleaning by myself. I work full time so value the weekends and am pissed off that I’m now cleaning up after him.

DH says - the house is to be lives in. Then tries to hug me.

Who’s being unreasonable?

I almost felt sorry for you, until I read "display white towels." 😂😂😂

I wouldn't be hugging someone with germs

Why?

You are both being unreasonable. Him for not cleaning up after himself and you for being poncy about towels.

My partner's shaving schedule is also very closely linked with when I clean the bathroom (especially when I hoover around the bottom of the sink pedestal etc)

Not as bad as my MIL though. If I have to rinse the debris from between her teeth out of the sink, every day, twice a day for the rest of my life, I think I'll KMS lmao

No, it’s diagnosed OCD. Comes with compulsions and ‘tests’ to protect people/things. It was managed by sertraline, but I had to come off it when I was prescribed sumatriptan for migraines.

Bloody men 🙄, I bet he looked at you all red eyed and snotty nose 😂😂

I know what you mean it’s infuriating. Would just like it to look nice for a little while, I would be mad at the bathroom it’s a pet hate of mine it should be left as it was found.

( I have show towels too 🥹 lovely yellow and grey ones that go lovely in the bathroom. They are arranged on a towel stand in front of the radiator, towels in use go on the radiator hidden from view don’t know why it’s only us that go in there but I like them )

Thank you!
I love to see fresh white towels when I go in the bathroom, all fluffy and ready to never be used! Used towels on a rack that hangs discrete on the back of the door, never seen 😂
My mum has gorgeous lemon ones which goes beautifully in her grey bathroom. Just us then I guess!

They are the towels that always look nice because they aren’t used. They make the bathroom look pretty. 🤷‍♀️^

^ why does the bathroom need to look pretty? Who actually sees it? I have never known anyone to have unusable stunt towels 😂. What else do you have? Sofas that no one can sit on? A stove that never gets cooked on?

Is anyone else flashing back to Friends, Monica and the eleven categories of towels from everyday use to fancy guest? That’s the only time I ever heard of anything approximating display towels.

They are the towels that always look nice because they aren’t used. They make the bathroom look pretty.

My towels that get used look nice, because we use them after washing (so no marks) and we hang them up nicely after using

My mum has "display" stuff too. It's f*ing everywhere. Towels, toiletries (that have been "on show" since possibly 1987 the contents have dried up), cushions - Can't sit on the sofa because of all the "display" cushions. But also not allowed to move the cushions because that would make a mess.

And pretty much the entire front room is only for display.

It's exhausting just being in the house.

"Stunt towels..." @holidaywin

😂😂😂

Display towels are the new penis beaker.

I get you OP. It’s not the specific things left out / about as such, it’s the total disregard that only people who didn’t clean can have. Made worse by the ‘life is for LIVING’ type comments.

still, if he normally does half it sounds like a temporary issue so grin and bear it I suppose.

The flat we're sitting at the moment has display stuff in the kitchen, oils and fancy vinegars that are lined up behind the cooker. If you want to cook you have to move them or they get splashed (or you wash them after) all the actual cooking oils are in a cupboard out of sight (and lower quality)

When we arrive at the flat sit I pack them all into a cupboard and only get them out again before the owner returns

I'm totally on your side, OP. My ex used to mess things up just mere minutes after I'd finished tidying, and it drove me insane.

I wasn't expecting him not to live in his own house but it felt so disrespectful that he couldn't be careful for at least an hour to let me enjoy what I'd just spent hours achieving.

Leaving a trail of mess isn't normal living.
It's selfish and disrespectful to Op

Is that you Monica? If he is genuinely unwell leave him be, he can clean it all up properly when he feels better.

What on earth ? towels are to be used a house is for living. display towels belong in a shop or a museum
back in real world hair would annoying me but the man is sick cut him some slack
get counselling and gp help for yoru ocd. houses are to be lived in

I have the same symptoms as your DH and feel horrible;I've taken some paracetamol and some Sudafed;gone to work and single handedly done all the parenting,pet care,meal planning,shopping,cooking,cleaning,laundry etc this week as my DH hasn't been around much this week due to work.

He can surely clean up after himself;I'd be annoyed too.

You deserve some lovely fluffy towels you can actually use after all that cleaning. Things shouldn’t be more important than people.

YABU.

He isn’t ‘messing up the house’. It’s just doing normal stuff in a house. Losing the plot over ‘sock bits’ on a carpet and ‘display towels’ is not normal. If my partner had a go at me for sitting on my bed and ‘not putting it straight’ I’d think he was a controlling nutter to be honest.

You are extremely obsessive about perfection in your home. That doesn’t mean he has to be obsessive too. He shaved and brushed his teeth, hung up a towel and sat down to put his socks on. Those are literally just normal daily activities and do not require a clean-up job to put them right.

He didn’t leave a trail of mess, though. He just used a bathroom, sat on a bed and walked across a room. Things don’t have to be scrubbed and smoothed and Hoovered after every use.

Oh this is my life too...sigh.

What, you too have a partner who has the unmitigated cheek to live in his own home?