To be envious that Victoria Coren Mitchell has a second baby at 51

[Monetm]

https://www.ok.co.uk/tv/breaking-victoria-coren-mitchell-baby-31338022.amp

Just that, really. I’m sure there will be a lot of posts on here about it’s too old and she should have done it sooner, but given that she didn’t, I am envious that she has the money and the luck and the situation to be able to do it now.

Can you imagine how different women’s lives would be if we just didn’t have to worry so much about the end of our fertility?

Not for me but congratulations to them, I'm sure they can afford some household help.

Plenty of men have kids at 50+ and people aren't as judgemental. The fact there's a big gap between their children makes me either think it was a struggle or a happy accident. Dp has told me not happy accidents here (I'm the same age)

Yes, a pregnancy at 51 from embryos frozen at 43 would be conclusive proof there were no attempts in between those years. After all, unsuccessful attempts and miscarriages in your 40s are totally unheard of.

(Not that we even know that's what's happened, and IMO it's quite rude to speculate.)

Ah I did have a little pang when I read her announcement earlier and did think I would have loved to have had another baby.
But as a child of older parents, I also agree that it can be tough on both the parents and the DC.

Interesting that nobody has commented on David’s age (49). It’s just Victoria who is selfish apparently?

Good on them both-as PPs have said, there’s a lot worse circumstances to be born into

If we’re speculating on how celebrities get pregnant, which we are, I also think there’s a good chance at age 43 it would have been a donor egg for the embryo. Unless she was exceptionally lucky.

rich people eh. I had my child age 43 so late, so longed for. It was an embryo from my 36-year-old-egg. One is enough. No way could I contemplate having another after having one in my 40s!

Maybe, just maybe she got pregnant by accident, and they decided to keep the baby? It doesn't have to have been some life choice to conceive! Maybe it was an accident and in the end they couldn't go through with a termination. It's not ideal having a baby at 51, but if she naturally managed it, then biology, 1 million years of natural selection, says it's okay.

I’m the exact opposite of envious. Parenting teenagers in your mid 60s! Dear god no thanks.

I'm sorry.

I had three very early miscarriages and then my husband became ill when I was in my late 40s. I had prayed for a miracle, but none happened. (Yes, I knew what the pitfalls were, but you get to the desperate stage.)

Aye, I feel a bit jealous any time I hear of an older woman having a successful pregnancy. Good luck to V C-M, however. I'm pleased for her.

Don’t start the normal nonsense of MN reading into things that aren’t there. I never once said I wish never been born for goodness sake. If you’ve never been the child with older parents you couldn’t possibly understand. I said I resented them having me later in life.

How is she not at least peri? I’m younger by almost a decade and already my body feels ancient: night sweats, insomnia, joints killing me, turkey neck etc… fucking hell my mind boggles at getting pregnant in a decade!

I’ll be a withered husk by then at this rate - certainly not up for fishing raisins out of tiny noses and swiping calamine over chicken pox-riddled yowling pups.

45 definitely isn't old for adoptive parents. People often come to it after infertility. And people foster into their 60s and 70s.

It's an involved process to adopt but there aren't many things that definitely rule someone out as long as you have reasonable mental and physical health

Good for them I think. They’re probably wealthy enough to get help in if needed so they may not be any more tired than younger parents, maybe even less so if they don’t have any household drudgery to contend with and they have a nanny etc.

I find the argument about it not being best for the kids so odd. I’m a child of older parents myself and I agree that it’s not ideal in many ways but it’s still preferable to having never been born!

No! It's selfish as fuck!

My parents were in their forties when I was born and it was awful having parents who were already slowing down when I wanted to run around. Plus it meant that unsurprisingly, I lost one of them when I was still a teen.

Well get you Nancy Drew 🙄

Possibly not if you wanted to adopt a newborn baby (although I'm unsure) but most local councils are crying out for foster carers. It is something I would consider when my son is older and I've actually been told I'd have to wait until he's older.

Sorry, but YABU.

Can you imagine how different women’s lives would be if we just didn’t have to worry so much about the end of our fertility?

Not every woman worries about the end of her fertility. I would suggest that an awful lot would be glad to seee the back of their periods.

Yeah but what if you hadn’t already had children? Would you rather just not have children than have a baby at 51?

Yes. I would rather stay child free if I hadn't had any by then.

So you don’t think lifelong childlessness would be worse?

I think you are projecting here. Being child free isn't the end of the world.

My question is, if you hadn’t had children till later, and you wanted children, wouldn’t you rather have a baby at 51 than never have one

No, I wouldn't

AIBU to think a baby at 51 is better than no baby if you want one?

No, I don't. Why would not having children be such a disater for you?

Well my DH is 11 years older than me, so I do think it would have been selfish of both of us to have a baby when I was 51!

Luck had bugger all to do with it. Medicine had plenty! Good luck to her!

Hadn't heard until I read this thread.

How wonderful. A much wanted child born into a loving family. Congratulations to them.

I couldn't imagine anything worse than having a baby at that age - not that I ever wanted a baby anyway. Does anyone ever think of it from the child's perspective?

Somehow these threads are making me feel like an old mum for having had a baby at 38.

I just can't imagine that. At 51 my youngest was 20 years old. Victoria looks good though and they are happy but I am sad for the child who will probably lose its parents when quite young and maybe never know grandparents.

They’re wealthy so will be-able to afford lots of help. Their experience of looking after a baby will be very different from the vast majority of people.

I’m really happy for them, love them both.

I wish her and her family the very best, but not for me. I spent my 30s on an IVF journey which resulted in one adored child. I would have loved another but wasn't to be and parked it at 40. I'm late 40s now and know I could not physically or practically have another child, I think it would kill me, I wouldn't have the energy for a pregnancy and the baby/toddler stage plus I neither have family help around nor the money to spend on extra help. I assume, and hope, she has one and /or the other.

Congratulations to them both!

In this day and age I'm impressed they managed to keep it under wraps (unless this was common knowledge and I've been living under a rock..)