For not wanting to give daughter cultural name

[Sia2822]

Hello
I am irish living in the UK (my parents are both Irish and we moved here when I was 2) My partner is Tongan in the pacific islands born in New Zealand in to the Māori culture.

Our first child (a son) was named a Māori name as he wanted and we went through all the names and compromised on one.

I really want to call our daughter Orla which is an Irish name, I don’t just want to call her Orla because it’s an Irish name, I want to use it because I’ve always loved that name and said I’d call future child it. If he doesn’t like that name (which he says he doesn’t) then I have 20 or so other options I like but he just says he doesn’t like them all. He doesn’t even think after I say the name, it’s just an instant no. I’ve asked him to find some baby girl names he likes and he made a list but they’re all Māori names and to be honest I don’t like them. He’s asked me to find a Māori girls name that I do like and although I’m sure there is a few I will like, I want to choose a name I truly want this time not be restricted to a certain culture of names.

Ive told partner that baby may be half tongan but she is also half Irish so it shouldn’t matter if she’s named a Māori name or not, his response to that was Ireland and England have “no culture”. I’ve suggested a Māori name as a middle name but he’s having none of it. Says baby needs a Māori name and that if she has an Irish or English name his family will feel hugely disrespected and that it’s important baby holds her culture in her name.

AIBU for not wanting to choose a cultural name this time?

Ireland is rich in culture! He's being controlling and a brat. Ask him if being c u next Tuesday is also a part of his culture. The child is half Irish too and he's disrespecting you and your family. But apparently only his side matters. Is that really someone you want to stick around? Put your foot down. Tell him he can have a middle name or take a hike. Orla is a beautiful name. Tell the hospital the paperwork for registering the baby is to go to you and you only so he can't sneak off and make the baby's name what he wants.

She said - he’s both.

No culture? He sounds horrible. He got his way on the other name so it's your turn now. Like it or not his children are half Irish and he is living in the UK so he has to compromise. Name her Orla, it's a lovely name.

This is nothing to do with culture and all to do with him being a controlling bully

That's so true, I'm English and dh is Greek - we lived there until eldest two were 5 and 7 but none if them feel the least bit Greek despite their Greek first names and surname (I was very heavily pressured into giving them dh's family names).
Also one son in law has an English mother, Arabic father and is very English (has Arabic name and surname). Other son in law has Chinese mother, English father and identifies most with his Chinese heritage though he has an English name and surname (I think he has another Chinese name).