School asking me to buy a £30 costume

[Tedn]

I’ll start with, this is a state school, in south east London, relatively nice area but like most London schools, some kids live in houses worth well over a million others in council houses. The school prides its self both on being inclusive and environmentally conscious.

DD is 4 and in reception, yesterday I got an email, giving all the children their nativity roles (yes I know very early but school say it’s to give parents a chance to buy the costumes) and with it links to the costume you should buy.
DD has been given the role of Angel Gabriel, the costume linked £30!!! The other angels costumes are only £15. DDs costume is the most expensive by £10 (the animals and the star are £20), and from a different place.
The teacher noted in the email that the PTA has some funds available to help those who may not be able to buy them and if that’s the case you should reach out to the class PTA rep on WhatsApp. However it’s not that I can’t afford it, it’s more just what’s the point on a £30 costume for one day? Why so much more expensive than the others?
The way the school does nativity is that the reception children have no real lines, instead all the Y1 and Y2 children narrate and the reception kids just act it out on stage. So it’s worse to me that I’d be paying £30 for a costume to wear for two afternoons to not even hear DD saying anything.
I spoke to the teacher briefly at drop off today and she said that they picked that costume as it stands out from the other angels and as she is Angel Gabriel they thought it would look better and make it easier to follow. She reminded me that I can speak to the PTA rep if I need any help buying it.
Now I’m also thinking that it’s just wasteful? What will I do with it when the nativity is over?
I will probably just buy the damned costume to save any headaches but AIBU to think this is a ridiculous, tone deaf (considering COL) and wasteful request from the school?

Yes I agree. Why don't you suggest this?

That's such a waste of money. If the school expects children to wear a particular costume, then they should provide it, and keep it for future years.
Or accept home made costumes.
At our childrens nativity/school plays, all costumes were hand made - either at school, or provided by parents. Or bought at charity shops. Angels were kids in white t shirts with a tinsel halo and cardboard wings. And they looked lovely, it was part of the charm.
When my DS was the caterpillar from Alice in Wonderland for the summer play, he wore a blue sleeping bag, blue faceprint, and deely boppers. Not expensive at all, and worked perfectly well.

The kids would leave them in school and someone from the PTA would wash them.

It's what happens in schools that provide costumes.

I agree let’s be honest school plays can be a bit shit
the best part at our was the homemade costumes pillow cases,bin bags, dressing gowns and bridesmaids dresses nothing matched absolutely brilliant kids looked fantastic

Having spoke to some friends about it who have older children in the school, they’ve said it never ends. The older kids do a panto every Christmas and they’ve been sent their costume list and it’s much the same!!
My friend also seems to think from a quick look down the list that they have given the roles with expensive costumes to families who they think will have the money vs the ones with less expensive to costumes to the others. Obviously I can’t confirm that but if that’s the case that’s even more outrageous!!

What happened to the white sheet and wire coat hanger angel costumes of old? Dressing gown and ttea towel for wish men. They don't need purchased costumes.

This is bonkers OP.

At my kids schools we'd get a note saying something like "please can your child wear a white T-shirt and leggings" and then the school would add the tinsel or whatever. Surely that's normal?

Costumes at our school are always left to the parent to choose, with suggestions on how the costume can be made or put together very cheaply. There's no way I'd buy one the school told me I had to buy.

At our school the kids only wear the costumes in school, they don’t go home with them. Then they’re reused every year.

This is crazy and beyond wasteful.

My kids' school has a set of nativity costumes they reuse every year (and presumably replace the odd that's worn every now and again). They never leave the school, so there's no danger of them not being returned. There's a washing machine in the reception classroom so I presume they wash them there.

I would say they've given the PTA plenty of time to raise funds for everyone's costumes. Much better environmentally as well as cost-wise. Are you a member of it OP? You could suggest a cake sale/ teatowels/ calendar or something.

what's happened to making a foil star out of cardboard and foil and using a white sheet or overlarge white T-shirt with white tights or leggings?

It’s even more frustrating now I realise some schools don’t even expect the parents to buy any costumes!!
I don’t think I’d have minded if it wasn’t so expensive (though I’d have grumbled at a school who prides themselves on being environmentally conscious being so wasteful).

Speaking as a teacher, I'd be annoyed, too. In the school I work at, we store nativity costumes in the school loft (along with all other xmas decs) and have an evening where staff get everything down. It's actually a big palaver but much easier than requesting that parents buy the costumes, for the reasons you've already listed.

I thought you were going to say it was for a senior school play, not infant school.

Schools should provide them.

Agree with others that this is rubbish, but I guess parents don't actually complain so they consider it ok?

My DC's school said something like "wear light coloured clothing" and they made haloes in school with tinsel for the angels. Similar requests for other characters - nothing other than normal things the children would have at home anyway with odd bits of costume kept by school from year to year. Yes, I'm sure it didn't look as flashy as OP's nativity will, but do parents really expect that at infants school?

Bloody hell that is just so absurd - £30 for a 4 year old for one day. I'd have said outright no.

Costumes were never allowed to go home. Stayed in school and children got changed in class before performances.

I worked in a triple stream school (so around 75 children per infant year group) and we managed to fund it through various events. Costumes reused for years without issue. Washed every year. Also managed to fundraise to buy a professional backdrop (featuring the star!) which was again reused year in year our. Made for great photos!

Our school has a set of nativity costumes. You send them in plain underclothes of a specified colour.

I'd find out who played the Angel Gabriel last year and offer the parents a tenner for the costume if they still have it.

More generally, email the head about how unacceptably wasteful this is.

You might but what about people with siblings, cousins in the school or those who want to re-sell. This is far from fool proof.

Can you find out who was Angel Gabriel last year and see if they have their costume still? actually surprised there isn't already a parents' costume swapping market in place-

The school is not being environmentally conscious. Suggest you point this out. It is lying if it promotes itself as being so.

I’m thinking now maybe I should say something? I guess it will never change if we all stay quiet about it?

We have a good relationship with the school, my DH works in TV/live events streaming and has been able to source them a lovely backdrop they can use year on year and offered the school filming and potentially streaming of the nativity free of charge this year (and probably for the next 2 where DD is still ‘in’ it) so I don’t want to damage those good relations being a moany martyr. But I do think this a ridiculous request that will put unnecessary pressure on parents and isn’t great for the environment!

Yes having to supply several outfits a year really adds up. Not just nativity at DDs school lots of other stuff, like spelling bee day, superhero day, Egyptian day, Tudor day, pirate day..We once tried to hand make an outfit, but all the other kids turned up in professional jobs and I am not sure she even forgives us now. I suggest looking on facebook marketplace or vinted for a bargain.

It would make sense to recycle outfits, this is what happened when I was a kid. However at my school there was a mice infestation one year in the store cupboard and that was the end of that. My mothers school (teacher at a different school) also had an impressive supply of outfits until a fire inspector came around and freaked out about the volume of clothes stored under the stage and refused to authorise the insurance renewal until it was cleared. No where else to store so that was the end of that at that school too. So I suspect that is what has happened at lots of schools and why they don't collect outfits.

I just wouldn't pay this. Cheaper costumes exist, I'd get one of those, or put something together myself for less.
The children won't know it's not the exact one you were told to order. And it obviously makes no difference to the actual nativity.