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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

See all MNHQ comments on this thread

Original poster

To think you just don't do this to a child

333 replies

Notanotherone8765 · 30/10/2023 15:25

My daughter's whole class go swimming every Friday. They get the bus to the swimming pool which is about 15 minutes away.
On Friday they were finishing up their swimming (it's the last thing of the day) and the teacher then said that everyone had to stay in the pool except my daughter. Turns out one of the girls was having her birthday party at the pool straight after. My daughter then had to get in the bus with the teacher and they came back to the school. I was there for the bus getting back and asked why my daughter was the only one on the bus and that's when the teacher told me. I understand not everyone is invited to everyone's party but would there not have been a better way of doing this? My daughter and I am very upset and I want to know if you think I'm being unreasonable. All opinions will be considered. Thank you
Oh and my daughter is 6 for context

OP posts:
stitchinguru · 30/10/2023 18:24

You need to follow this up with the school for so many different reasons.

MatthewsMumFromTikTok · 30/10/2023 18:25

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00100001 · 30/10/2023 18:25

Why would they all leave the kids at the pool unsupervised? Confused

What pool parties start at 3/3:30 on a weekday?

MargaretThursday · 30/10/2023 18:25

When ds was 6yo apparently he was allowed to pilot the Concorde when he was on a school trip to Brooklands and he flew to Australia and back.
Anyone like to tell me if they believe him?

He wasn't known for tall tales.

Original poster
Notanotherone8765 · 30/10/2023 18:25

PortalooSunset · 30/10/2023 18:23

Is there a class WhatsApp group? Are you a part of it if so? Just most parties seem (from what I read on MN) to be discussed on there.

No WhatsApp class as far as I'm aware

OP posts:
Liv999 · 30/10/2023 18:26

That is so upsetting for you both OP, I would seriously consider taking my daughter out of the school if it was me, no excuse for leaving one child out of a party if the whole class is invited it's just nasty I would be livid too

Saschka · 30/10/2023 18:26

PortalooSunset · 30/10/2023 18:24

@Saschka Grin

It was a very involved lie! Apparently she organised the 9 year olds into three teams… total fabrication, apparently it was an entirely uneventful journey home.

TravellingSpoon · 30/10/2023 18:26

What happened to all the other adults who attend the swimming? Its not just the teacher that goes, there have to be other staff and helpers.

Original poster
Notanotherone8765 · 30/10/2023 18:26

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No we were emailing back and forth. I offered them proof of school and everything

OP posts:
MatthewsMumFromTikTok · 30/10/2023 18:26

I wish it were nonsense. I really do. But this is real life to my myself and my daughter right now and now they are off for Halloween, which I suppose is a blessing as she doesn't have to be in school for a week now

Wait.... they are off school for HALLOWEEN?? Why?

Didshejustsaythatoutloud · 30/10/2023 18:27

OMG, this is so nasty and cruel. Why do PARENTS do this. WTF is wrong with them? Most of us decent parents would never do this to a 6yr old. I understand not all kids get along but to leave just one out is pretty shitty.
Much ❤️ to you and your wee one
(Won't always be like this) X

Mumwithqs · 30/10/2023 18:27

I'd be complaining heavily to the school. To be honest I'd class it as the school facilitating bullying. In fact I wouldn't be above moving schools over this.

CesareBorgia · 30/10/2023 18:27

Notanotherone8765 · 30/10/2023 18:21

I wish it were nonsense. I really do. But this is real life to my myself and my daughter right now and now they are off for Halloween, which I suppose is a blessing as she doesn't have to be in school for a week now

Show quote history

They get a week off for Halloween? Do you mean half term?

MatthewsMumFromTikTok · 30/10/2023 18:27

So who was responsible for the kids left in the pool?

00100001 · 30/10/2023 18:27

Being exclude aside.

The school would NOT leave the kids unsupervised at an external venue... They would have parents collect them or something.

How does the teacher know which kids are going to the party and which aren't? Why would they have that information?

Why wouldn't they insist parents collect their children, even if from the pool?

Original poster
Notanotherone8765 · 30/10/2023 18:28

MatthewsMumFromTikTok · 30/10/2023 18:26

I wish it were nonsense. I really do. But this is real life to my myself and my daughter right now and now they are off for Halloween, which I suppose is a blessing as she doesn't have to be in school for a week now

Wait.... they are off school for HALLOWEEN?? Why?

What do you mean? The schools here all get a week off for Halloween. I'm in northern Ireland

OP posts:
badhappenings · 30/10/2023 18:28

Terrible thing to do to your poor DD.
There are some bastard parents out there.

MatthewsMumFromTikTok · 30/10/2023 18:28

No school gets time off for 'Halloween' .... is this why it's getting treated like Christmas Day!?

TripleDaisySummer · 30/10/2023 18:28

Saschka · 30/10/2023 18:23

Do you have evidence beyond the word of your DD that it happened? Because DSIL told DMIL that the school bus broke down on the way home from swimming, and the teacher forced all 30 9 year olds to push the bus, while she watched them. DMIL stormed into school to complain, and then looked very silly when it turned out to be a load of cobblers.

She says in OP she asked the teacher why she and her DD were only ones on the coach.

It sounds a really odd way for a UK school to behave - was the teacher put on the spot and relatively inexperienced - were all the parents there to take charge of the kids I asked because it's does just sound unbelievable.

I have known an occasional child be let go with parent rather than taken back to school on coach - though that's not usual either.

MatthewsMumFromTikTok · 30/10/2023 18:29

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capabilityfrowns · 30/10/2023 18:29

Clearly the comment from hq means they do NOT believe this is a troll thread . Sometimes things like this happen

My son gave the class Xmas cards when he was 7 and the entire class tore them up and binned them . When I raises it with the TA she asked what she was supposed to do

MY reply was teach children that it was incredibly unkind ?

I'm sorry this happened op.
Firstly could it be an oversight ?
Whose party was it and does your dd get along with them ?

I'd speak to school . Get some clarity .

Original poster
Notanotherone8765 · 30/10/2023 18:29

MatthewsMumFromTikTok · 30/10/2023 18:27

So who was responsible for the kids left in the pool?

The child who was having the party, her mum arrived. Not sure who else was there to be honest. But it was the teacher that told me what has happened so not a tall tale from my daughter like a lot of posters are saying

OP posts:
TripleDaisySummer · 30/10/2023 18:29

MatthewsMumFromTikTok · 30/10/2023 18:28

No school gets time off for 'Halloween' .... is this why it's getting treated like Christmas Day!?

My kids will be off as it happens to fall in half term here.

Redditchcycler · 30/10/2023 18:29

No way did this happen

queentim · 30/10/2023 18:29

YANBU. That is just cruel