DP says I'm selfish for having DD's birthday cake gluten free

[IntergalacticP]

Basically thread title.

DD turns one at the start of December. I've arranged for a local baker to make a cake for her. I asked for it to be gluten free as I have celiac disease.

DP said this was selfish. His reasoning being that gluten free cakes aren't as nice as normal cakes. He can't seem to come up with any other reason.

I just wanted to eat some of DDs first birthday cake.

I truly don't understand why giving everyone the nicest cake they are able to eat is deemed awful.

I have to correct you, even if I'm totally off subject as far as this post goes. 😊 I make some lovely vegan cakes and they're so good that even though I'm not technically a vegan any more, they're still our cakes of choice. They're also much less faff. I can throw a cake together without having to nip out for eggs or whatever. The key is finding the right recipe source. I've never knowingly eaten a gluten-free cake but I'm sure it's possible to make delicious ones if you find the right recipe and don't just think using gf flour in your usual one is going to be ok.

YANBU my daughter is coeliac and we find the bakery gf cakes are lovely particularly a chocolate fudge or biscuit cake. We often get gf and no one ever notices. I have to admit the gf cakes I make aren't great. The only thing that stops me sometimes getting one big gf for everyone is that it is sooo much more expensive, if it's not my daughter's birthday I'll get a small gf cake for her and a normal for the rest of us but only due to cost not taste. It is your daughter's first birthday so the cake is mainly for you so enjoy your big gf cake 😀

I think you're right to get the GF cake. You should have set a poll.

The nicest cake everyone is able to eat is a gluten free cake from a good bakery.

Last Christmas I accidentally made a gluten free cake and even I couldn't tell.

It literally didn't occur to me until I made the recipe for a second time that there was no flour in it at all.

@MasterBeth People can tell. They are too polite to tell you

Well that's a mighty claim. You know what everyone is thinking?
Fact is, lots of great cakes are gf by nature. Brownie type cakes, polenta cakes, ground almond based cakes. Sure gf victory's sponge is not great but gf carrot cake is not a compromise. .

Yes, clearly. But irrelevant.

This is really interesting. You think it's more important than everyone gets the same cake rather than everyone getting the best cake they can have.

I think it's better than everyone gets the best cake, appropriate to their needs.

It's a claim that can't be substantiated, but so is your claim that no-one can tell the difference.

This is not helping anyone!

Everyone wailing about gluten free cakes being bad when they probably exclusively buy mass produced shop garbage cakes. The sad thing is a lot of them will actually be coeliac but never be diagnosed as the majority of people with coeliac disease are never diagnosed and suffer things like infertility, dental issues and eventually osteoporosis and cancer of the bowel.

The whole point of a birthday cake is that you all eat the same one. It's a communal thing.

If you want your own individual dessert, go to a restaurant.

He’s an idiot.

I occasionally buy a slice of cake from a deli as a treat. After numerous pieces I’ve just found out it’s gluten free. I never would have known if it hadn’t come out in conversation. Pity your husband had to know in advance.

Oh for goodness sake! If a 5 star Hotel in London can do an entirely gluten free menu including desserts and cakes without even bothering to mention it is gluten free ( when it first opened) and get accolades galore then ofcourse it is possible. But you clearly dont want to consider the possibility so fine. (Indigo St One Aldwych!)

I'm not gluten free. I have both made and eaten GF and non GF cakes that taste exactly the same!

”The whole point of a birthday cake is that you all each the same one.”

Is it? The whole point? Really?

I'm coeliac too, anyone coming to my house is gluten free. They have no idea and I don't tell them. Maybe that is the way forward 😁

Get two gf cakes from a really good bakery.

Tell him one is 'normal'.

If he says the 'normal' one is delicious, far better than the other - you have him cold.

If he says it isn't very nice - say there was no point having a non-gluten one then.

Gluten Free or coeliac, there is a difference - obviously

YANBU, get a GF cake and maybe add a plate of cupcakes for anyone who values cake more than the spirit of sharing a special birthday cake.

Yes. It is.

We've all eaten plenty of rubbish shop bought cake over the years for precisely this reason.

lots of great cakes are gf in nature can’t be substantiated?? So easy to do, unless this is a roundabout way of saying you can’t actually read? Pull out a dozen well known classic cookbooks/cooks recipes from long before gluten free was a thing or we knew what gluten was, and read the recipes. The ones I listed earlier are classics I was making before I ever tried to bake gluten free, because they are just great cakes.
But you will tell yourself somehow that I made that all up.

The claim that can't be substantiated was: People can tell. They are too polite to tell you.

I would not be so rude as to suggest that you not comprehending that means you can't read.

https://www.nigella.com/recipes/pear-pistachio-and-rose-cake this one looks delicious too. not for you @MasterBeth as you don't like gluten free

Exactly!!