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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Shop came while WFH

267 replies

Kiopa · 20/10/2023 13:55

I realise this is a ridiculous thing to be arguing about but interested in opinions of whose in the wrong here.

A orders the food shop to come 10-11am. B is working at home at that time. A expects to be home by 10 but ends up running late by 15 minutes. The shop arrives at 10am and B has to take it in and put the frozen things away. A puts the rest away. A says they would have messaged B that the shop was coming but normally this supermarket sends a text 15 mins before they arrive and they didn't this time. B thinks A was inconsiderate not to let them know the shop might come before they were home.

A and B are now in a stand off as B won't let it go until A apologises for being inconsiderate and A doesn't accept that they were inconsiderate.

YABU - A is in the worng
YANBU - B is in the wrong

If you can't tell we're both extremely stubborn.

OP posts:
Intriguedbythis · 20/10/2023 14:33

Sounds exhausting

Vriddle · 20/10/2023 14:34

B needs to apologise for making this an issue. In an office, people interrupt you working. A the time. Questions, anecdotes, requests, etc. There should not be an expectation that there will be no interruptions when WFH, just that they be reasonable and do not impact on your overall productivity.

B stood up, took in the shopping and put away the frozens, all in roughly the time it takes to make a cup of tea.

GoodnightJude1 · 20/10/2023 14:34

B needs to get a hobby.

bathrobeandpie · 20/10/2023 14:34

Kiopa · 20/10/2023 14:31

So i just went an apologised (to the person asking why - it was because it is a non-issue really and he was right that i should have said). He then apologised for overreacting and explained that hes not feeling v happy at the moment and thats why he thinks he overreacted. Thats for various (good) reasons that im not going to go into here.

I probably didnt need to post on mumsnet but it helped me feel a bit more objective about the situation.

sound very reasonable and sensible even if it took some time to get there!

user1497207191 · 20/10/2023 14:35

A and B both need to grow up and stop bickering like infants!

Onelifeonly · 20/10/2023 14:35

I chose YANBU but actually you were if B didn't know shopping was due to be delivered. WFH does actually mean 'working'.

bathrobeandpie · 20/10/2023 14:35

Vriddle · 20/10/2023 14:34

B needs to apologise for making this an issue. In an office, people interrupt you working. A the time. Questions, anecdotes, requests, etc. There should not be an expectation that there will be no interruptions when WFH, just that they be reasonable and do not impact on your overall productivity.

B stood up, took in the shopping and put away the frozens, all in roughly the time it takes to make a cup of tea.

why do you think people work from home exactly? Literally to avoid all that interruption 😂

Of all the places you want no interruption, your own home is one!

TulipCat · 20/10/2023 14:35

A and B are both petty and precious.

SkyeIsPink2 · 20/10/2023 14:36

I work from home. But I have to take calls from customers. So I would want to know the time slot in advance so I can arrange to be away from the phone.

WFH does not equal being available for everything

Jackiebrambles · 20/10/2023 14:36

Fizzadora · 20/10/2023 14:00

Are A & B actually adults?

This, both of you need to get a grip! I mean, how much frozen stuff was there?! I don’t know anyone who can time when delivery people come to the door!

IncognitoIsMyFavouriteWord · 20/10/2023 14:38

If, like me, B has a lot of calls and meetings with client's, I would be livid that they were not home.

I can't just come off a call to answer the door, take a delivery etc.

Better planning for the future

Fightyouforthatpie · 20/10/2023 14:39

YABU for A and B bollocks HTH

Blondeshavemorefun · 20/10/2023 14:40

A aka you should have told B food is coming 10/11. I should be back but if not listen out for door

Why were you 15m late

If B wasn't at home would you still been late or thought what the hell

As if B wasn't at home and shopping came at 10 the time you asked for and then went without delivering , you would be annoyed but your own fault as booked 10/11

ilovesooty · 20/10/2023 14:41

Cheeesus · 20/10/2023 13:59

Depends on B’s job.

Very much so. It wouldn't apply to me but if it did, my WFH doesn't allow me to stop what I'm doing to take in a delivery and put it away.

TerrorAustralis · 20/10/2023 14:43

Unless B is performing neurosurgery while WFH, he needs to get a grip. If he is performing neurosurgery while WFH, you have bigger problems.

Fernticket · 20/10/2023 14:44

Both A & B need to grow up!

Ladybughouse · 20/10/2023 14:45

What happens if work on a call centre, phone line.
Also I wouldn’t be happy having to take 15 minutes out of my lunchtime. So only having 15 mins for lunch.

McIntire · 20/10/2023 14:47

In our house there’s no way B would be able to take the shopping in if WFH and A would apologise for being late

Crumpleton · 20/10/2023 14:48

He then apologised for overreacting and explained that hes not feeling v happy at the moment and thats why he thinks he overreacted.

Good it's all sorted..
Maybe ask if he needs a chat or there's anything in someway you can do to help with this..

ilovesooty · 20/10/2023 14:51

TerrorAustralis · 20/10/2023 14:43

Unless B is performing neurosurgery while WFH, he needs to get a grip. If he is performing neurosurgery while WFH, you have bigger problems.

Don't be silly. There are some jobs where if you're on the phone WFH you simply cannot be interrupted.

Travelismything · 20/10/2023 14:51

B is an arsehole

Pinkfluff76 · 20/10/2023 14:51

Oh ffs isn’t the food for both of you??

JustAMinutePleass · 20/10/2023 14:51

Of course A should have let B know about the shop. He could have then planned for it when setting their meetings the day before. But I think A’s a bit of a nob for not taking travel times / delays into account when organising the shop. It should squarely have been there at a time they knew they were going to be home.

Superduper02 · 20/10/2023 14:53

That stubbornness will not get you very far together. Lighten up the two of you! Ideally no-one should be ordering a food shop to arrive during work hours - the end.

Boska23 · 20/10/2023 14:57

I WFH and have a lot of meetings. So a shop I did not expect could actually really upset my working day. A should have informed B that shop is expected, even if they planned to be there to take it.