Dh going to get takeaway pizza when I already made pasta

[Chocolatewarerfalls]

Made pasta an hour ago for all of us, Dd (5) and I ate ours as we sometimes do before Dh gets home from work, I put a dish out for Dh for when he got home.
Im in the kitchen washing up, feeling full
and hear Dh come in, Dd comes running in saying we’re getting takeaway pizza, I say I’ve made dinner and we’ve already eaten though 🤷🏻‍♀️Dd starts crying and shouting how she wants takeaway pizza and daddy says we’re having it. Dh says he didn’t know I had made any dinner. Dd decides to be cheeky and says we’re getting pizza, Dh agrees with her and she shouts to me that we’re getting pizza.
Aibu to feel completely undermined here?
Its not about the pizza itself…or am I being petty?
Also bearing in mind that we’re trying to save money and I suggested getting a pizza maybe tomorrow night as I’ve made dinner for today and we’ve eaten ours and now feel full?

OP I’m sorry that so many posters took the opportunity to be needlessly critical in their comments. I’m becoming quite disillusioned with the tone of MN because of the lack of empathy and generosity of spirit. It is quite possible to comment disagreeing with an OP’s views or actions without being so aggressive.
Folk should also realise that not everyone can afford to let their hair down and relax just because it’s Friday evening. Some have make choices about spending and consider children’s and family activities on the weekend.

Don't be childish op let the man have pizza

You’re a great person to have around days after an event.

He's been at work all day, comes home not knowing about the pasta and then fancies pizza. And now he's being trashed on MN.

So bloody what. Let him buy the pizza.

Partner has a v.close friend, now colleague who's SAHM wife cooks for her and the kids everyday at 5pm... he doesn't finish until 6pm. On the road everyday, all weather and never comes home to a fresh cooked hot meal. He has to have re-heated pasta a few times a week cause thats all the kids want. He's happy to cook when he gets in but he's not allowed to because the kids will be going to bed soon, and it's to loud. My partner talks about it most evenings. He gets stick for it at work - they know he's going home to pasta, turkey dinosaurs and peas.

Are you her? 🤣

Is this a habit? If not sounds harmless and like you should be tucking in to some pizza too.

I know you said you wanted to save, but it doesn't sound like it would have been your last £30.

Chuck the pasta in tub and send it to work with him tomorrow.

You get the pizza left overs for lunch..

Sorted
.

Sounds really odd, the whole thing.

He could have just said "oh sorry we'll get pizza tomorrow " and if one of our children spoke to either of us that way nobody would be getting any blooming pizza that's for sure!!!

That's breeding bad manners in your kids, really bad he hasn't supported you. Like you said, it's not about the pizza!!!

How did he get it right? He gave into the 5 year old to stop a meltdown lol thats the worst thing he could have done

What was the pasta dish?

Yeah but he created the tantrum by telling her she was having it and then mum saying no (which I do understand why she said it)

I remember feeling completely disappointed by things like this as a kid and it was shit. I don’t see it as giving in to a tantrum, I see it as doing something to resolve the shitty situation he created.

He's allowed to tell his daughter she can have pizza. He is an equal parent

OP shouldnt have undermined him in front of the daughter, that caused the tantrum

The child shouldnt be rude to either parent but she is 5 years old so best not disagree in front of her.

I haven’t read the thread, but imo he’s an arse. What’s wrong with waiting til tomorrow? Takeaways are full of bad stuff. Only have them occasionally unless you want to end up obese, with CHD and diabetes and all that entails (chucks handgrenade into thread and walks away laughing). OP, I’d come home and eat your pasta willingly and I would be grateful for it. And I would stay slim and lovely and lively because I eat a healthy diet. In my house takeaway pizza is only in emergency (otherwise they’re all home made. Polished halo 😇). Like I said, he’s an arse.

Good for you but he wanted a takeaway pizza and being an adult that's up to him, right? OP had left a bowl of pasta on the side for him , big deal. Really want to know what kind of pasta it was though op?

You are saying that you are feeling undermined but your husband didn't know that you had already cooked pasta and eaten it when he told your child that he was going to get pizza. He told your child he was going to get her a pizza and then you told her no. So it could be argued that you undermined him by telling your child that she couldn't have pizza after her dad said she could. You also say you are trying to save money but they could have pizza tomorrow. Whether you have pizza tonight or tomorrow it will cost the same. Any left over pizza or pasta would have kept until tomorrow so you could have had the left overs for dinner tomorrow. It would have saved an argument and a tantrum if you just let your husband get the pizza and then asked him to next time check with you first to see if you have already cooked before telling your 5 year old they can have a pizza.

Have a slice of the pizza, eat mostly salad tomorrow and have a family singalong of "Let it Goooo" before bedtime. Nothing trumps pizza greed, of course your 5 year old wants some. Nobody is in the right or wrong here, and this really is not a hill to die on. Or to sit on, furiously watching everyone else happily tucking in.....

I think you’re overreacting.

He didn’t intentionally try to sabotage dinner or undermine you. He obviously fancied pizza and said it before he’d seen you/the pasta.

Crossed wires. Not the end of the world. You’re DD was just super excited about it. She shouldn’t have shouted but the scene had been set and the pasta keeps.

I wouldn’t lose sleep over it or sit in my room being petty. He could easily say you never communicated it was pasta and your stopping him having a pizza like he’s a child. An equally daft argument.

I'd be peeved too if after i've cooked that DH came home and said he's getting pizza, knowing i'd already cooked. To me it's not the fact he wanted pizza, the pizza isn't really the problem. It's that OP had already cooked and he didn't even bother to check or ask if OP wanted pizza before she'd started cooking, if OP had known he wanted pizza she could have waited and not cooked. OP said that DH said he didn't know she'd cooked, erm he knows OP cooks every night so of course she'd have cooked dinner, so him saying he didn't know is a BS cop out! Dd could have had a snack to tide her over until dad got home with pizza if dinner was going to be later than usual.

She clearly doesn’t cook and finish that early every night, and you do know she’d just left him a cold bowl of the left overs on the side?

@Janieforever 😂Are you still here…very overinvested in putting me down..I think I’ve said it a few times and most likely to you..it wasn’t a *Cold bowl of pasta left on the side. It was made not much earlier, still warm and in a warm oven for when he came back. Got that now? 👍