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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

WWYD if you found high heels in your husband's car?

374 replies

ThirtyThrillionThreeTrees · 13/10/2023 17:51

If your husband told you he was going to a work related black tie ball with colleagues (happens a few times a year) and the following morning you found a pair of ladies high heels in a bag on the ground in the back of his car how would you react/what would you think?

OP posts:
cwigley · 13/10/2023 18:09

I left my shoes behind at a function once and someone of the opposite gender recognised them as mine and picked them up for me. I did not sleep with this person or have any untoward relationship! Not everything is nefarious.

Flickersy · 13/10/2023 18:09

Why does everyone always assume the worst instead of thinking of all possible options? The amount of relationships where there seems to be zero trust and constant suspicion is quite shocking.

Unless he was missing all night or has been dodgy with his phone or came home smelling of another woman's perfume / with lipstick on his face, I'd guess he'd given someone a lift and just ask him.

Screamingabdabz · 13/10/2023 18:11

If my DH hadn’t been up front and mentioned to me that he’d give Sue a lift, or Diane asked him to store her heels because she’d changed or whatever whatever… I’d suspect the worst.

hopeishere · 13/10/2023 18:11

Gave someone a lift and they left them in the car.

toadasoda · 13/10/2023 18:11

Agree its probably all innocent. Ask him! If he was having an affair or slept with a colleague I suspect he would have been more careful to not leave evidence.

capabilityfrowns · 13/10/2023 18:12

I'd just ask him .

sleepymama3 · 13/10/2023 18:14

I'd immediately think that he gave someone a lift, as others have said, or that a colleague left her things behind, only realised when she left and texted

sleepymama3 · 13/10/2023 18:15

Sorry. Texted him or a WhatsApp group asking for the things to be retrieved for her

Idratherbepaddleboarding · 13/10/2023 18:16

In a bag, in the back of the car, I’d assume he’d given her a lift home. Have you asked him?

Colourfulponderings · 13/10/2023 18:16

Bluevelvetsofa · 13/10/2023 17:54

I’d like to think that he’d given someone a lift home and she’d changed out of the heels, put them in a bag and left them in the car.

This

OhDoh · 13/10/2023 18:16

Immediately think he had given a female co worker a lift home and she had forgotten them.

YourNameGoesHere · 13/10/2023 18:17

He obviously gave someone else a lift home and she'd changed her shoes. Honestly why do people have to look for suspicious behavior in everything. Hmm

Georgyporky · 13/10/2023 18:18

What did he say when you asked him?

Anniegetyourgun · 13/10/2023 18:19

Enough about size 9s, please. My feet are size 9 and I'm 100% born woman. Not that I wear heels these days, but in my dancing days I might've. Size 12 now... not so likely.

That said, XH's feet were size 8. He had form for swiping (and ruining) my trainers, but heels would I feel be a swipe too far, even for him.

Zola1 · 13/10/2023 18:20

I'd assume his colleague took flats to change into and forgot to pick her shoes up when she got out the car because she was drunk

thistimelastweek · 13/10/2023 18:20

I think that after he shagged his colleague senseless in the back of his car, she put her shoes in a bag and walked home barefoot.

AirFryerFrequentFlyer · 13/10/2023 18:21

Mycatshandbag · 13/10/2023 17:53

That he dropped off a female colleague who swapped into comfie shoes and left her heels in the car by mistake.

This.

MN loves a LTB, but this is the obvious and most likely answer.

Hiddenvoice · 13/10/2023 18:21

I’d probably think he’s given someone a lift home to someone who changed into comfy shoes but do you have reasons to feel there’s more to it?

Dixiechickonhols · 13/10/2023 18:21

Given a colleague a lift and she forgot bag unless massive back story.

mynameiscalypso · 13/10/2023 18:24

Or he offered to take the shoes for her and give them back the next time he saw her because she was going on out to a club or whatever and couldn't be bothered to carry a bag of shoes with her.

Screamingabdabz · 13/10/2023 18:27

YourNameGoesHere · 13/10/2023 18:17

He obviously gave someone else a lift home and she'd changed her shoes. Honestly why do people have to look for suspicious behavior in everything. Hmm

Yes because no man has ever cheated on his wife at an overnight works do has he? 🙄 Of course high heels is a cause to be suspicious - my DH is an absolute cast iron family man but I’d still bloody want to know!

Littlewhitecat · 13/10/2023 18:28

thistimelastweek · 13/10/2023 18:20

I think that after he shagged his colleague senseless in the back of his car, she put her shoes in a bag and walked home barefoot.

😂

CaptainJackSparrow85 · 13/10/2023 18:28

This did actually happen to me once. I asked my husband for an explanation and his explanation was that a female colleague (who I’ve met a few times) got very drunk and had to be taken home early, but she left her heels behind at the party so he threw them into his car intending to take them into the office on the Monday. I’m pretty sure he was telling the truth in as far as you can be.

5128gap · 13/10/2023 18:28

That he was having an affair and the black tie event had just been a cover for taking the OW late night shoe shopping. And that she'd kept the new ones on and left her old ones in the car. And that she'd done that on purpose so the affair would be outed because she wanted to break up my marriage and steal DH. Because even though he's 56 and balding, gorgeous young women are always pursuing old men.

YourNameGoesHere · 13/10/2023 18:29

Screamingabdabz · 13/10/2023 18:27

Yes because no man has ever cheated on his wife at an overnight works do has he? 🙄 Of course high heels is a cause to be suspicious - my DH is an absolute cast iron family man but I’d still bloody want to know!

Show quote history

Yes of course some men have cheated on an overnights work do but I suspect the number is significantly lower than those who've given their colleagues a left home.

Also if he was cheating don't you think he'd go to the effort of removing some pretty obvious evidence. Sometimes the most obvious answer in this case giving someone a life is the right answer.

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