To think life would be better without Christmas

[MyDogsPaws]

I really hate Christmas, I know I’m probably in the minority but it’s October and I’m already worried and stressed about it and I suspect I’m not alone!

If it was just a case of putting a tree and a few lights up and having your family round for dinner in the 25th I would absolutely love it, I’d start thinking about it in December and look forward to having a nice day with my family. Unfortunately it’s not like this, there is fucking Santa and all that entails, school Xmas shows and needing to get time off work for it all, the cost of everything and being skint for the entire winter because i have to spend every penny I earn on presents or visiting Santas ducking grotto, or buying outfits for Xmas parties, and all the rest of it.

Yes I could just tell my kids there’s no such thing as Santa and all they’re getting is an orange and a book this year but that’s not going to stop them feeling left out when everyone else in primary school got a iphone 15 or whatever.

I really believe that Xmas makes life less enjoyable, not more and I’d quite happy ban it it, tinsel and all, for the rest of eternity, AIBU?

I don't even try to hide the fact that I can't stand Christmas.
It's just a big expensive stressful pita.
I would be very happy to give it a miss but I smile and make merry because I see how happy it makes the rest of the family.

@Namddf said: You’re a scientist? 🧐

Well, I went to University umty-diddly years ago to read Physics, but transferred to Psychology, where my interests were perception and cognition. A few decades later I did an MA in Linguistics, where my specialism was Conversational Analysis.

I like Christmas itself and the idea of it a lot but I hate the financial pressure.

I wonder if there is a way you could limit gifts to your children only ? And just make the day itself special. No need for elf on the shelf or December 1st or Christmas eve boxes. You don't need to bother with grotto s etc. Just keep it simple.

Christmas doesn't over exaggeration in my house small tree no excess decorations roast with pigs in blankets lots of alcohol fuck all else

Depends what they've been raised to expect.

Mine is 16 and knows my financial situation. Wanted a new phone last year, both exH and I contributed and it was a Nokia, not a brand new iphone, so it didn't break the bank.

I stick to the 4-present rule, both for my own organisation and because anything beyond that is excessive. Want-need-wear-read. Some on here call it miserable, I just call it sensible.

The kids both still love being here; we spend time together playing games, relaxing, eating duck roast rather than turkey (so much nicer), going for a walk.

There's little pressure.

yearly I argue with my mum about her putting up Christmas decorations. Since dad died she doesn’t see the point. After they’re up I always at some point see her smile, nod or appreciate them in some way. That is Christmas to me. Shoving family together and playing a board game. You said about the Christmas shows. Watching Christmas movies. yes it sucks when you miss one because you can’t get time off work (missed both one year) but the excitement of it … me and you are very different people op!!!

That’s sad, I’m sorry that you felt like that as a child & the not understanding why is almost worse 😢 Do you fear that your children will feel the same if you dial it all back a bit? Is that maybe what’s stopping you from reining it in?

@ginasevern Luckily my question wasn’t for you so you don’t need to see the relevance in it. If you were able to stop your pass remarkable self from eagerly typing to let me know you don’t agree with my question for long enough, you possibly would have been able to see where I was going with my question.

YANBU but stop spending all your money on presents etc. cut back and tell others, family etc, you are scaling back.

If you want a simpler Christmas then do it your way (although you might have to still enjoy school plays /nativities etc ). If I see one more article telling me how to have the perfect Christmas (over the course of at least a week)I may scream. Its one thing I think the Americans have right it's their approach to this. They celebrate Christmas for one day...that's it

See I think this is a bit incongruous. The Romans made it the 25th December in the third century when they adopted Christianity ( to take the wind out of pagan sails).

The difference between longer and shorter days is minutes. How did they measure minutes?
Especially as you say it depends on the weather. If it’s wet and cloudy, it’s dark.

How?

I don’t think they necessarily did, @MehtotheChristmasrunup — I think the celebration happened in midwinter because the days were shortest and darkest, not because their systems of measurement noted a few minutes more of daylight here days after the solstice.

There’s a stone circle near where I’m from which is oriented to sunset n the solstice — ie the sun sets between two hills exactly over a notch in a flat recumbent stone at the west of the circle, and the difference isn’t noticeable a day or two either side of the solstice. It’s been carbon dated as being active between 1100 BC and 800 BC.

YABU
Christmas is a feast time for family/friends in the middle if the coldest, most miserable time of year. It has it's origins in pagan festivals to celebrate the turning of the year where the purpose was to cheer everyone up when it is generally, dark miserable and cold outside.

The fact it's become to be associated with Jesus and more recently mass consumerism is very unfortunate IMO.

I hate all the consumerism and I'm not religious so I try and think of it from a feasting/twinkly lights point of view and it gets me through.

I reckon if the nights are clear there could be an accuracy to within 3 days, maybe even better than that. After all, Stonehenge lines up on the day of the Summer Solstice. But I am not a paleo-astronomer.

Most folk wouldn't notice. But some nerd would be watching carefully to see where on the horizon a particular star rose, which will change each day. It does depend on having clear nights though. The heavens will have looked magnificent without manmade light pollution.

In my youth, I could see the stars and Milky Way from suburban London. Now if I want proper darkness I have to go up Weardale, or to the moors between Newcastle and the Scottish border.

Yes, it’s a terrible strain for a lot of families. It helps if you can plan and save all year round for Christmas but I realise this is hard for people on very tight budgets. I saved £25 pcm in a gift card savings plan and. Got my £300 M&S gift cards mid November. A great boost to my Christmas food shopping.

Yes I'm the same I also really hate xmas the songs make me cry its stress lost family members around xmas as well its makes me cry every year. It should be banned to commerisied now to many of these sad depressing tv adverts on at xmas as well.

Feel the same way. Like time off work and with my husband, but there’s always one moment when our miscarriages/infertility hit me right between my eyes and it pulls me all the way back down.