by expecting boundaries to be respected?
I gave birth to a baby earlier this week.
Due to some medical issues I asked family not to post on social media until after we had announced ourselves.
We announce using a photo of baby’s foot as we don’t put pictures up outwith albums with seriously restricted access - just family and very close friends.
We texted family to give them the go ahead but asked that they only use the same anonymous photo. This message was in no way ambiguous - the go-ahead, photo and request not to use any others we had sent were all in one message.
"D"M posted a picture showing baby’s face, not the one we had specified.
She then texted “oops posted the wrong picture”.
I asked her to change it - she refused saying it would look strange and she wanted her friends to see more than a foot (note I did not say it couldn’t be sent privately, just not posted publicly online)
Further comments included “is there something wrong with her?” And “it’s up now and it’s staying up - this is MY grandchild”.
DF sided with her stating we were “controlling” and “you want to suppress the joy of grandparents”.
He had already accused me of “pissing people off” by refusing to reveal her sex prior to birth.
DH and I both work in fields that involve elements of cyber security - me with some really nasty criminals who would wish me and my family harm - so it’s an issue for us and the problem is not just the picture but the ignoring of boundaries.
AIBU?