Page 9 | Not giving DS advance on pocket money

bizzybeing · 2023-10-01T07:53:03+00:00

DS (10) gets £5 per month pocket money. There's nothing he needs to buy with it, just fun stuff he wants. I try not to tell him what he can and can't spend it on but once it's gone, it's gone. Yesterday DS saw a book he really wants on a really good offer but he was £1 short. I agreed that I would buy the book so he didn't miss the offer but that he would have to wait to have it until he's saved up the full amount. DH thinks I should let him have it now. It'll be 2 weeks until he gets his next pocket money and can buy it off me. So AIBU? Yes - give him the book now, he can pay the extra £1 later No - he needs to learn to budget for things he wants

Ohthatsabitshit · 02/10/2023 14:35

NightSku0 · 02/10/2023 13:51

I couldn’t imagine ever being so tight that I wouldn’t just give my kid an extra £1 to buy a book.

Maybe if you gave him a decent amount of money he wouldn’t need to beg you for a extra pound.

It’s called educating your children. Like not giving them sugary drinks and not letting them watch tv all night. I do wonder how you expect children to learn how to manage money if you just slip them a bit extra whenever they want someone.

AlwaysGinPlease · 02/10/2023 14:37

£5 is very tight inmho. Just buy him the book for goodness sake!

AlwaysGinPlease · 02/10/2023 14:38

gotomomo · 01/10/2023 09:02

I'd give him a chore to do to earn the money

Delightful 🙄

caringcarer · 02/10/2023 15:02

I think most 10 year olds get at least £10-15 per month pocket money. Your D's wants to spend his money on a book you should be happy to give him the additional one pound. I understand you want him to learn budgeting but with so little money it's almost impossible to learn with. Give him a pocket money raise.

Sirzy · 02/10/2023 15:08

Ohthatsabitshit · 02/10/2023 14:35

It’s called educating your children. Like not giving them sugary drinks and not letting them watch tv all night. I do wonder how you expect children to learn how to manage money if you just slip them a bit extra whenever they want someone.

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That works if you give a reasonable amount to cover what is expected to be purchased with it. If you’re not even giving enough to get one book a month then that isn’t going to teach anything really.

Ohthatsabitshit · 02/10/2023 15:15

It teaches you to save for the things you want @Sirzy

NightSku0 · 02/10/2023 15:15

Ohthatsabitshit · 02/10/2023 14:35

It’s called educating your children. Like not giving them sugary drinks and not letting them watch tv all night. I do wonder how you expect children to learn how to manage money if you just slip them a bit extra whenever they want someone.

Show quote history

I educate my kids plenty thanks so you can stick that comment.

But it only works when you give them a decent amount in the first place! The kid can’t even buy a book a month. The OP isn’t even giving a reasonable amount.

NightSku0 · 02/10/2023 15:16

Ohthatsabitshit · 02/10/2023 15:15

It teaches you to save for the things you want @Sirzy

Give over.

Save for 2 months to buy a poxy book…. 😂

Sirzy · 02/10/2023 15:35

Ohthatsabitshit · 02/10/2023 15:15

It teaches you to save for the things you want @Sirzy

Again though that only works when given a decent amount. Having to save all your pocket money for two months just to be able to buy a book doesn’t teach anything.

for children to learn from pocket money they need to get an amount that will cover the basics it’s expected to pay for in a reasonable time.

Ohthatsabitshit · 02/10/2023 15:45

@Sirzy No I think it has to be more than the months money so you have to save up. Otherwise it’s not saving it’s just “waiting for payday” which isn’t the same skill. In an ideal world the child would then realise that if they had put aside some money in month one they would have had enough for the book AND spends for both months (£1:50). Waiting to be able to purchase something you want is fine, surely we all do it all the time.

@NightSku0 you may find a book a “poxy” purchase, but for people who enjoy reading it’s a real treat.

StuffedToys · 02/10/2023 17:03

You can teach your kids the value of money without being quite so rigid about one pound at the age of ten.

MalcolmsMiddle · 02/10/2023 18:07

Depends on his activity this month IMO and the cost of the book. If the book was £2 and he's wasted £4 on crap so had £1 left I'd be inclined to agree. If the book is £4/5/6 then YABU as it's not about budgeting as such.

PandaExpress · 02/10/2023 18:33

@bizzybeing No, I don't have a limit on books. We're all big readers. DD and I get at least one new book (or set of books) each a week, plus all her comic subscriptions. We also use the library, but like me, she has books she wants to keep. I don't have a limit. Of all the things to put a limit on, books isn't one of them. Again, all this over £1. This thread has shown you that 99% of us are horrified by this. There's one poster who keeps posting in agreement with you, but for most of us this is the very definition of tight.

MrsKeats · 02/10/2023 19:16

This has to be a joke.
'Buy' it from you?

Ohthatsabitshit · 02/10/2023 20:36

99% of you may have children who wouldn’t see a book as something they’d like to save for, and may be abysmal with money. We don’t know. What I do know now is very few people seem to think just fixing things by adding more money is a bad idea, and in fact most will just throw money at their children to avoid them having to wait for anything. While you might think it’s tight OP has a child that adores books and is buying him one he wants at a book signing. I don’t think he suffering too much.

MrsKeats · 02/10/2023 20:57

throw money
What a pound?
Don't be ridiculous.

NightSku0 · 02/10/2023 21:03

Ohthatsabitshit · 02/10/2023 20:36

99% of you may have children who wouldn’t see a book as something they’d like to save for, and may be abysmal with money. We don’t know. What I do know now is very few people seem to think just fixing things by adding more money is a bad idea, and in fact most will just throw money at their children to avoid them having to wait for anything. While you might think it’s tight OP has a child that adores books and is buying him one he wants at a book signing. I don’t think he suffering too much.

‘Throw money’ ….. one whole pound. It’s tight.

Ohthatsabitshit · 02/10/2023 21:05

A pound is a lot when it’s 20% of your weekly income. All this “it’s only a pound” and “poxy book” is so lacking in understanding of what this child experiences. Presumably OP could buy him the book and just give it to him. She could do that every day. I think he’ll feel better if he saves and waits for it myself, and I think he knows his mum wants to help him get it.

NightSku0 · 02/10/2023 21:08

Ohthatsabitshit · 02/10/2023 21:05

A pound is a lot when it’s 20% of your weekly income. All this “it’s only a pound” and “poxy book” is so lacking in understanding of what this child experiences. Presumably OP could buy him the book and just give it to him. She could do that every day. I think he’ll feel better if he saves and waits for it myself, and I think he knows his mum wants to help him get it.

Weekly income? He’s 10. Treat him like a child, not an adult.

Plus he gets £5 a month, not a week.

and regardless of how you try to dress it up, it’s tight and it’s a quid which isn’t a lot of money.

DillyPotatoes · 02/10/2023 21:08

I20% of his monthly income.

Ohthatsabitshit · 02/10/2023 21:15

Yes monthly sorry I was distracted by RL. I think some people just spend a lot more money than others. It’s fine, just not what I would do or encourage.

MrsKeats · 02/10/2023 21:45

Didn't realise that children had weekly school income.
Who could be bothered with all this drama over a pound?