Not giving DS advance on pocket money

[bizzybeing]

DS (10) gets £5 per month pocket money. There's nothing he needs to buy with it, just fun stuff he wants. I try not to tell him what he can and can't spend it on but once it's gone, it's gone.

Yesterday DS saw a book he really wants on a really good offer but he was £1 short. I agreed that I would buy the book so he didn't miss the offer but that he would have to wait to have it until he's saved up the full amount. DH thinks I should let him have it now.

It'll be 2 weeks until he gets his next pocket money and can buy it off me.

So AIBU?
Yes - give him the book now, he can pay the extra £1 later
No - he needs to learn to budget for things he wants

I give my dc pocket money because he likes an xbox pass and credit for his phone. I was never taught about money and I have fucked up so many times. Not doing that to my dc so they get a specific amount that covers certain things plus a little bit extra for tat and sweets. I teach them that it is up to them to prioritise but if they run out of money for what they want then I don't have the money to bail them them out. Maybe I am really mean about this but I can't have them ending up like me and it worked for the first 2 dc.
I have very little money but I do think £5 a month is not enough. Also - a book? Get your dc to clean the skirting boards/give the extra pound as a gift but don't stop a 10year old buying books

I got £5 a month pocket money when I was 10 in 1985, which is the equivalent of £15 today. If you can afford it, I think you need to increase his monthly allowance a bit. Or at least some sort of scheme where he can do jobs to earn some more.

Why wouldn't you just apologise, admit you're wrong and give your child the money or the book?

Normally, I'm a big believer in budgeting & waiting till you can afford it etc but he's 10yrs old! And he wanted to buy a book! I'd be thrilled at that alone & either deduct the quid from next month's money or give him a job to do to pay it off. No biggie. Cut him some slack.

Same here. I’m not a perfect mum and so when I have got it wrong, I admit & apologise to my children and change my approach. It’s good role modelling too because even in work/careers you can’t cover up and deny when you’ve done an error. You should admit, apologise and clean up your mess.

I’d give him the book today and give him the pound.

reading for pleasure is so important and has so many benefits- encourage it where you can!

£5 a month is far too little, especially if there's no compromise, so, so mean not to give him the book now, imagine grudging giving your child £1, especially when it's for a book , which most parents would have bought their child themselves.

100% this. You can’t even learn how to budget on £5 a month. It’s just silly tbh.

Yabu. Very unreasonable. It’s a book. I wish my dd would read. Encourage and nurture this. I’ve spent hundreds on books trying to entice her.

I wouldn’t expect him to pay for a book out of his pocket money. What book can you buy for £5 anyway? Buy him the book or take him to the library to get it.

Omg. I’ve just realised it’s £5 a month. That’s way way too little if you expect him to buy books.

You’re being unreasonable. It’s a book, educational. Give him £1 less next time

I wouldn't make a 10 year old wait 2 weeks for a book for the sake of a quid. Not everything has to be about teaching them a lesson, somethings can just be exciting and joyful- like a brand new book you can't wait to get home and read.

Yeah. What a shit 'principle'. Adults get things wrong and can back down and apologise, model that. Jesus Christ.

My kids rarely buy books with their pocket money. I buy them for them. Books are great and should be encouraged. I'd give it to him now, while he's enthused enough to read it. If it was anything else E.g . sweets then I'd say no, wait.

Poor lad, just give him the book.
And a fiver a month pocket money for a ten year old is measly.

If £5 a month is all you can afford than totally fine. But £1.25 a week seems quite low if not.

Weekly pocket money would be better than monthly at that age. I would just have contributed the £1 for the book tbh. Making him wait is mean.

I was thinking that's really low for a 10 year old too, if things like a book he wants is getting included!

Unless you are really struggling for money you sound very mean. It's a book. It's a pound . Just buy him the bloody book.

We are a fairly low income family, but I always cover the cost of books for dc (whether they or I choose them). Books are so essential, imo, it would be like asking them to pay to buy their own socks

I would never ever withhold books from a child.

Just give him the book.

At least you’re giving him content to discuss with his therapist when he’s older

Reading for children is so much more important than pursed-lipped (sic) Puritanism over spending, unless you really cannot afford £1.

I am actually shocked.