If you're an only child, did you ever wish you had a sibling?

[redmalt]

I've always thought I was one and done but here I am having a second! I never envisioned my son having a sibling.

I've always wondered though, do those who are an only child ever wish they had a sibling? There is me and my older brother and I couldn't imagine being an only child.

Interested to hear opinions

I always wanted a brother or sister when I was little. For no actual reason though. I was happy enough by myself and I'm fine now I'm an adult.

<yawn> it’s been a while since we had a parents of only children bashing thread.

Of course I'm not going to tell you you were lucky to have an abusive brother. I'm talking in general terms, not specific ones.

Why is it ''bashing'' anyone to speak honestly of your life and your feelings?

If anyone's got guilt about being the parent of an only child then don't lay it on the child or deny their honest experience of it.

Not really, no. I liked the house being quiet and not having anyone around to argue with like my friends with siblings. I did go through a phase of wanting an older sister, but that was more because my best friend had one and she got to borrow her make up 😂

I have an only child myself now and am fine with that. I have lots of friends and a long-term partner, I don't consider myself alone.

I was an only child and longed for a sibling. But it was harder caring for elderly parents and when they passed there was noone left to share family memories with. Ihave grown up children and grandchildren but still still wish I'd had a sibling.

The reality is, life is so expensive these days that although not yet, it’ll be more and more common that people just have one child. If they have kids at all.

I wanted a sibling apparently when I was very little. I got one and realised it was the biggest mistake of my life. We have never got on from that day to this. I have an only child and it's amazing, I tease him that we might have another (we won't!) and he has always been horrified at the idea.

I'm dreading having to sort out my dads funeral and inheritance with my sibling, I can see it being a complete nightmare.

I do think some of the parents on here who were onlies are going to be disappointed when their children aren't all helping each other out and rallying around them in their old age. My observations are that it really does seem to fall down to one (usually female) sibling. Of course there are exceptions. Especially if you all remain geographically close.

There is a lot of unspoken resentment and issues amongst siblings in relation the care of elderly parents and decisions around cost of care etc. You just won't come across it until you are at that stage in life (i.e. you are in your 50s and 60s).

Yes, I’ve always been jealous of those with close siblings, I had older parents and I’d have loved a brother or sister both as a child and as an adult. But of course I have a romanticised view of it!

If you'd had a brother there would be a very good chance that it would have been left to you to do the caring anyway - or if you had a sister that wasn't interested/lived abroad for example.

Nope, I’m an only and I don’t feel bad about it. I have 2 children and was fascinated by their relationship as they grew up; the dynamics and how they are now that they’re older. They definitely get on better now than they did as children - the endless bickering was a right pain!

It's funny - threads specifically asking for opinions from only children are always inundated with posts from people with siblings.

Because everyone’s experience is their own. We’ve already had posters criticising the fact that people have only children, deciding that having siblings is better, funny how no-one ever starts a thread questioning whether people despised their siblings growing up and yet mn is full of posters with toxic relationships with their siblings, many of whom are NC. If anything it could be considered damaging to have more than one child, but no-one would be tolerated saying that would they?

It’s the usual stereotypical bollocks. No-one has a miserable upbringing because they’re an only child. If their upbringing was miserable then that has to do with the way they were brought up. No sibling would make that better.

No never.

My adult dd is an only too

No not really and "to give your kid a sibling" is not a good enough reason to have another.

I was an only and I was desperate for a sibling...however I had a tough up bringing and it was more that I didn't want to be alone. My son may be an only child but I know his childhood would be so much better than mine.

It's still not ''bashing'' anyone to ask for lived experiences, or to give them.

I very much enjoyed being an only child. I had quite a few friends who were also onlies so it didn't feel odd. Those friends who did have siblings did not seem particularly close to them.

Nope. Never.

I got a first rate education.
I got to do whatever sports/hobbies I wanted.
I got all the attention I could ever want and need.

A sibling would have stopped 1 and 2 and probably impacted 3. My parents stopped at one so they could give me everything they never had growing up. I’m incredibly grateful that it was just me tbh.

As a child I wanted a sibling on and off but was mostly happy in my own company. As an adult when my dad became very ill and I thought I might lose him, I desperately wished for a sibling.

No, never. I'm 64 and liked being an only, my mother was also an only.

I used to worry about how I would cope when my (divorced) parents got old and eventually died, but it turned out that I managed quite well with it all.

Yes, very much so. I always felt outnumbered by my parents ie everything was adult-centric rather than kid focused like my friends' families. I was also really paranoid that everyone thought I must be spoilt as a child (someone must have said this to me) so I like weirdly deprived myself of things so others wouldn't see me as spoilt. Opinion seems very split on here so I guess it's totally unique to a particular family setting.

Yes, I’d prefer not to be an only.

If anything it could be considered damaging to have more than one child, but no-one would be tolerated saying that would they?

Say it, if you want. Start a thread and see?

But if we're going to talk about tolerance of speaking freely, remember it was you yourself who accused this thread of being an attack.