Why do we ignore the fact that most affairs don’t involve an OW?

[AkakeSlumnering]

Or an OM for that matter?

Please, we all know most affairs in marriages are between married people.

Most people that are married and having affairs are having affairs with other married men/women.

AIBU to think there’s a focus on OW in affairs even though they make up a minority of affairs in real life?

That's a joke. The majority of posters are always about heaping far more blame on her than the MM.

That's not how most people use it. OW is just that. The Other Woman in the relationship, whether they are married or not.

It’s just means OW or OM - it doesn’t mean they aren’t married.

Here is my understanding:

The OW is just the woman regardless of marital status

The single woman seducing married men is the homewrecker

The man is the knobhead

As an aside to this, would you be more upset if your other half left you just becuase they were unhappy and were not involved with someone else?

The person’s marital status in the deceit is irrelevant, surely? They are the ‘Other’ person regardless.

Or OM - Who exactly do you think they involve then? Anyone's marital status. Doesn't not make them. Another man or another woman.

Good grief OP. You're wrong

You didn't have Saving all my love for you as your wedding dance, did you? 😅

THE ultimate other woman song.

Ultimate SINGLE other woman song. Played at weddings!

This is a post on another thread right now that I think proves the OP's point:

WidthofaLine · 22/03/2023 10:48

What's the worst thing to call an ow...

A mysogynist.

So predictable, it's the only thing they hide behind here, their love of women and how dare wives hate them so much when there are men to hate instead.

Well wives do dislike ow, but I also believe that those ow who abuse wives along with their ap's, dislike and disrespect all other women.

Wives have a deeper respect for all women, we would not dream of harming a family unit just for sex, we are above that, we have respect for ourselves, our bodies, our children and woman kind.

Just because you don't, don't expect us to like you just because it's expected we should like all women, we don't.

And also going by the many threads on here supporting ow and their vindication of any blame involving an affair, does show your very apparent views that you are not supporters of women at all, your loyalty to women is flakey and non existant.
Oh and mm are being shits to their wives, if you don't think men use ow to get back at their wives you are sadly mistaken, however ow like to think it's about love, it's not in most cases, you only delude yourselves.

So yes there is a lot to be angry about for ow, they are used and many of them do come here and talk for there is no where else for them to go, they are voiceless in the outside world, silenced by their own prison of guilt and shame whereas wives are respected and ow hate them for that, it's very apparent.

Bit antiquated - I’ve not heard the trope of the ‘single, husband-stealing seductress’ in yonks!

Are you confusing the term with ‘femme fatale’?

Bit antiquated - I’ve not heard the trope of the ‘single, husband-stealing seductress’ in yonks!

Maybe men invented this one. These tropes always make them sound a catch too.

Real life is more like socially awkward, zero integrity Terry feels criticised after an argument with his wife and bitter, divorced Susan in human resources with low self esteem tells him she thinks he's just awesome.

There's a poster somewhere whose father had an affair and married his OW. It was all awful at the time but everyone came to realise the original marriage was unsuited and everyone ended up with a much more compatible partner and are on good terms. That was about 30 years ago.

She said that far from being a pair of evil, scheming, sexual geniuses, they are "a pair of boring old farts who wear beige and remind each other to take their statins".

OP if you’re saying this because of the Prime show ‘Wilderness’ then I completely understand because that came as a shock to me.

Are you this difficult on purpose.. there’s always another woman unless it’s another man

Don’t be daft.

I don't know, I often think my dp might be having an affair with the loo roll by the amount of time he spends in the fecking toilet

To take the thread slightly off tangent, I'd be interested to know what percentage of affairs are made up of the following (assuming heterosexual affairs) :

Married woman-married man

Married man-single woman

Married woman-single man

I suspect married woman - single man to be the lowest type.

Any idea?

I sort of get where OP is coming from though the other woman is often described as such, married or not.

Perhaps it has connotations of being a sexy vixen out to steal someone's husband, though that's a myth I think.

my thoughts exactly.

I worked in two offices where there was a very high rate of affairs between staff. I would say that most of the cheating men had serial affairs where as the women were more inclined to have an affair with just one man. Not sure if this is the norm, but all of the men were married, whereas probably less that 50% of the women were that had affairs. I know this is only one experience but I imagine it is fairly common that it is this way around.