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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To think having XL bullies around children is child neglect?

260 replies

Eaglemom · 22/09/2023 10:31

To think that parents who have XL Bullies in the house with children should be investigated for child neglect. Its the same as leaving a child with a loaded gun to play with. What the hell is wrong with people that are willing to take this chance with their children’s lives?

OP posts:
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6
Anothagoatthis · 23/09/2023 01:51

Eaglemom · 22/09/2023 22:23

@stuggling5939 it makes me die a little inside also when I see babies and kids near these things.
The arguments that it’s the owners not the dogs... It’s infuriating when people debate if it’s the dogs nature or the owners, clearly both are at play... but I don’t care.. whoever is at fault these dogs need to be wiped out because of their aptitude for aggression and also for the fact that the constant fall into the hands of irresponsible owners. All that I care about is that the end result is stopped.

Exactly, I don’t understand that argument at all - it’s a bit like the ones who say people kill guns don’t.

The fact is dogs, like gun, find themselves into the homes and hands of a wide range of people. A significant amount of those people will use them for harm be it through neglect or deliberate misuse. So it’s better for anyone not to have these kind of breeds that are killing disproportionately.

I really don’t care if it’s the dog or owner you blame for an attack, I just want laws that prevent these attacks happening in the first place . Not laws that purely focus on allocating blame after they happen.

I do feel people are just deflecting and derailing when they go on about “it’s the owner” since we can’t make sure all dogs have perfect owners there needs to be laws regarding muzzling, leads and owning breeds that are far stronger than you.

Eaglemom · 23/09/2023 01:53

@Anothagoatthis I completely agree

OP posts:
ItWillWash · 23/09/2023 02:03

@Eaglemom I'm sorry you felt drawn to watch something so horrific. As I said, I can only imagine and that is nightmare-inducing enough. I would suggest, though, that seeking counseling would be a better use of your time than posting internet threads encouraging others to similarly traumatise themselves.

As for BSL, we will have to agree to disagree. Banning pit bulls has not done anything to reduce the number of dog attacks, I highly doubt that adding another "type" of dog to an already ineffective law will help matters at all. This thread has taken a very dark turn, imo, so I'm out. I truly hope you get the support you need to overcome what you witnessed.

BabyFireflyx · 23/09/2023 02:17

I see social media posts from people I know very often showing their dogs in close contact with their tiny newborn babies, slightly older babies, toddlers and young kids. I cringe every time.
There's silly old me who kept my cats from ever being too close or left in the same room as my DD from newborn to around 7 years old. Not one incident.
She's 11 now and our 7 cats adore her. They all come running when she gets home from school.
I have ferrets, highly trained by me. DD is now 11 and I wont leave her unattended with them because I'm very aware that they are used to me and know their boundaries with me, they wouldn't hesitate to bite hard and cling on with someone they're not used to being around. I keep them separated because ferrets are not a pet for kids. They are however very loving when bonded and I adore them. But it's not hard to put a boundary between pets who could hurt a child.

Devilsmommy · 23/09/2023 02:32

@Eaglemom I completely agree with you about these dogs. There's just no point arguing with the idiots on here, they just aren't going to change their minds about those cutesy softie dogs😠 I asked someone on another thread also would they still feel the same if it was one of their family members being ripped to bloody shreds? It's a fucking joke the absolute wilful blindness to dogs and aggression. And to have children in the mix makes me want to puke

MeinKraft · 23/09/2023 02:44

Insomniaa · 22/09/2023 12:55

Someone I used to know from school has an XL bully that looks like its muscles have been generated by AI. The thing looks almost fictional its appearance is so intimidating. All over his facebook are photos of his 3 year old holding the dog on its lead whilst the dog stares at the camera broad chested and dead eyed. It’s so uncomfortable to look at I have unfollowed his posts.

I hate those kind of posts. A young child getting licked by a huge scary dog or a newborn baby sleeping beside a bull terrier that kind of thing. And the accompanying waffle about how 'there are no bad dogs only bad owners' and 'I know my dog and she wouldn't hurt a fly' I'm sure the dog has been lovely so far but seriously stop being a soppy fucking idiot about a dog and protect your kid.

Anothagoatthis · 23/09/2023 08:21

Eaglemom I'm sorry you felt drawn to watch something so horrific. As I said, I can only imagine and that is nightmare-inducing enough. I would suggest, though, that seeking counseling would be a better use of your time than posting internet threads encouraging others to similarly traumatise themselves.

Bizarre! @Eaglemom already said they wished they never watched the video but the fact is whether you’ve watched it or not - and I haven’t - it still happened. And yet some posters seem completely focused on the fact somebody watched it l rather than fact it happened?

I think someone on this thread posted that they had the misfortune to witness this horrific brutal act in person. Have all those who keep going on about the OP shouldn’t have watched the video commented on the trauma this poster would have suffered?

Spare the faux concern for Op, who chose to watch the video, and focus on the greater matter at hand of a dog actually brutalising a human to death!

Perhaps the family have asked people not to watch it but they would much rather it didn’t happen again, and I’m sure they are more horrified by the death of their child/brother to the hands of one of these dogs than the fact that people are watching it.

I never watch those gruesome police brutality videos out of respect for the victims, and for my own mental health but I’m not going to go on and on about people watching the video without addressing the issue that police brutality shouldn’t happen to begin with. That is what you call derailing and deflecting and it’s shameful.

The thread didn’t take a dark turn it was ALWAYS dark because the subject matter is selfish irresponsible people who unnecessarily subject their children to dogs that have a track record of killing and can overpower multiple grown men.

EasternStandard · 23/09/2023 08:39

Anothagoatthis · 23/09/2023 08:21

Eaglemom I'm sorry you felt drawn to watch something so horrific. As I said, I can only imagine and that is nightmare-inducing enough. I would suggest, though, that seeking counseling would be a better use of your time than posting internet threads encouraging others to similarly traumatise themselves.

Bizarre! @Eaglemom already said they wished they never watched the video but the fact is whether you’ve watched it or not - and I haven’t - it still happened. And yet some posters seem completely focused on the fact somebody watched it l rather than fact it happened?

I think someone on this thread posted that they had the misfortune to witness this horrific brutal act in person. Have all those who keep going on about the OP shouldn’t have watched the video commented on the trauma this poster would have suffered?

Spare the faux concern for Op, who chose to watch the video, and focus on the greater matter at hand of a dog actually brutalising a human to death!

Perhaps the family have asked people not to watch it but they would much rather it didn’t happen again, and I’m sure they are more horrified by the death of their child/brother to the hands of one of these dogs than the fact that people are watching it.

I never watch those gruesome police brutality videos out of respect for the victims, and for my own mental health but I’m not going to go on and on about people watching the video without addressing the issue that police brutality shouldn’t happen to begin with. That is what you call derailing and deflecting and it’s shameful.

The thread didn’t take a dark turn it was ALWAYS dark because the subject matter is selfish irresponsible people who unnecessarily subject their children to dogs that have a track record of killing and can overpower multiple grown men.

I’m the same as you with videos and also agree with what you say

Iheartpizza · 23/09/2023 10:31

Eaglemom · 23/09/2023 00:38

@XenoBitch i tell you something else, that video has prompted me to find out and advise my kids in what to do if they are ever attacked by one of these to give them the best shot at surviving.
your horror really needs to be directed to the right place which should rightly be towards these dogs and their shitty owners.

Honestly the only way to stop this type of attack in the vast majority of cases is to kill the dog.

Do what you have to do to defend yourself....

stayathomer · 23/09/2023 10:49

ItWillWash

A dog who is properly socialised and accustomed to a wide range of people, other animals, noises, and environmental factors will not randomly take a dislike to someone for no reason nor is it likely to become fearful to the point where its fight or flight instinct kicks in.

If you have a dog who does this it is not yet fully socialised and you need to contact an APBC registered behaviourist.

They’re sentient breathing animals. Of course they can take a dislike to a person or situation! It’s like learning to drive, random situations arise!! Do you not think even a dog that’s been trained to the nth degree (probably only about two percent of dogs in my opinion, contrary to people irl and on mn who all have perfect dogs who do exactly what they want a hundred percent of the time) can’t possibly fully know how to react to everything that comes up? Our puppy has been going to dspca dog training classes since he was old enough and I read a lotttt of dog books but I’m not a trainer and while he’s pretty amazing and looks trained etc I’m under no illusions if something happened when we were out (eg the other week a group of men started fighting on the street and he had no idea what was going on!!!) I can’t 100% or even 50% be sure of what he’d do!

SidekickSylvia · 23/09/2023 11:00

How do you kill the dog though? I'm 5'10" and 11 stone, so if my spaniel flipped and attacked me, or another person, I could lift him/hold him back. These XL bullies weigh almost as much as me and are solid muscle. Fit, healthy men can't stop them.

The poster who's tried to turn this thread into a debate about watching traumatic videos has admitted to having a large dog, and I can't help but wonder if they'd be able to restrain it if it flipped. Because that should be the absolute bare minimum requirement.

Nanny0gg · 23/09/2023 11:06

Eaglemom · 22/09/2023 10:45

I agree it’s difficult to judge which are and are not violent but that’s why these people are taking such a gamble on their children’s lives. They just don’t know for sure.
I wish they could be removed from every family home ASAP. Too many owners have blind faith in these dogs which is absolutely petrifying.
Seeing all the owners coming out with pictures and interviews about how great these dogs are with their kids is just horrifying.

I think they're terrifying dogs

However, do you feel the same about rottweilers? Dobermans? Jack Russells? German Shepherds?

It's the owners. A bad owner can turn a chihuahua into a menace. And even one of those could do a lot of damage to a toddler

LlynTegid · 23/09/2023 11:06

Whilst banning certain breeds is not a silver bullet, it would be one step forward. Not that I think this government will do that.

As for child neglect, given the lack of resources for children's/social services, I doubt most councils would follow up if you reported it as such.

Iheartpizza · 23/09/2023 11:16

SidekickSylvia · 23/09/2023 11:00

How do you kill the dog though? I'm 5'10" and 11 stone, so if my spaniel flipped and attacked me, or another person, I could lift him/hold him back. These XL bullies weigh almost as much as me and are solid muscle. Fit, healthy men can't stop them.

The poster who's tried to turn this thread into a debate about watching traumatic videos has admitted to having a large dog, and I can't help but wonder if they'd be able to restrain it if it flipped. Because that should be the absolute bare minimum requirement.

You use a knife....

SidekickSylvia · 23/09/2023 11:55

I wish I could, but I've never broken the law in my life, and I don't think I'd be able to start now.

Iheartpizza · 23/09/2023 12:53

SidekickSylvia · 23/09/2023 11:55

I wish I could, but I've never broken the law in my life, and I don't think I'd be able to start now.

Well that's the only way you will have a fighting chance. A pocket knife isn't illegal to carry I don't think and you would need to get it in the heart or the throat.

I've never broke the law either but what are we supposed to do exactly? I'd rather be convicted of carrying a knife that I'm not supposed to than die!

TizerorFizz · 23/09/2023 12:58

“Banning”? What would this involve? How do you find the dogs? Are they then kept in a pound or destroyed? How are they identified? Who destroys them? Who would if the dog hadn’t done anything? How do you stop breeding? Who will “police” this? What would you do with the breeders? What would you do with their dogs? How do you find these breeders in the first place? It is already an underground type of breeding practice.

Unworkable knee jerk laws solve little. There will be another cross breed developed to take their place. Unless we throw a huge amount of money at this snd are prepared to destroy dogs (will the vets?) it is difficult to see a law working.

So getting hysterical doesn’t solve the issues of poor dog ownership in society. If there was no market for these dogs they wouldn’t be bred. How do we destroy the market?

SidekickSylvia · 23/09/2023 13:06

I totally agree from a logical perspective and I wish they didn't exist, I just don't think I'd have it in me. I've never had to give a thought to my (and my dog's) safety before, when walking my dog, and I hate that I have to think about it now. I wonder how many beloved pets have been ripped apart in front of their owner's eyes by these monster dogs, too.

SidekickSylvia · 23/09/2023 13:08

Sorry, the above was to Iheartpizza.

TizerorFizz · 23/09/2023 15:04

No dog would be injured if these dogs wore muzzles. But who’s going to police that? As I said earlier, my dog was attacked by a husky. Before that a cocker spaniel. His owner was mortified but he flipped suddenly. No explanation for it. Thankfully “just” bites but dogs can be difficult to predict. We have decided not to have another one.

Iheartpizza · 23/09/2023 16:37

A dog attack, on a person or other animal is unacceptable, irrespective of breed.

However, It's the damage that bull breeds can do, plus their reluctance to let go once locked on which is the issue.

The vast majority of other breeds could be kicked, punched, wrestled away. These can't be.

HerMammy · 23/09/2023 17:04

"locked on" does not exist, no dogs jaw can lock.

VeterinaryCareAssistant · 23/09/2023 17:54

@Iheartpizza bull breeds can't lock their jaws

Princey1981 · 23/09/2023 19:10

It's not just XL bully's, it's the same with all dogs.
It depends how a dog how been brought up as well, if a dog isn't trained or brought up to b a fighting dog I wouldn't trust it around me let alone a child. What needs to happen, is we need to start punishing the owners instead of punishing the dog, a dog can be trained at any age but these irresponsible owners that don't give too shit abt the dog are being left to own another dog to do the same.

Sheehy20 · 23/09/2023 19:18

Are you for real, not all xl bully's are bad, it is how they are trained and how they are bought up, like a child. You can't hate against them when you don't know how they are trained. Also the little dogs can be worse, going for the big dogs and biting them, stop judging until you actually know what the dog is like

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