To call my neighbour selfish

[Fedupandgrumpy1]

We live in a quiet street with about 10 houses in. I have mobility issues and also struggle with my MH. It's important for me to have as much sleep as possible so I tend to go to bed at 10.30pm and don't get up until about 11am.

Very recently a family moved in next door. They have 3 children who are lovely and not a problem. But their mother annoys me and I feel she is being selfish. She works strange hours and most days leaves the house to go to work at 4.30am. She drives an old car and the doors creaks when she opens it. She then normally sits in the car with it running for 5 mins before driving off. The father is fine.

I have spoken to her and told her about my health issues and have asked her to consider changing her working hours, replace her car or to park her car in a road away from the house. She said she was sorry that she disturbs me but she cannot change her working hours due to the nature of her job. She said they can't afford to replace the car and as its an old car she has to warm it up before going anywhere. She admits the door creaks and said that oiling is didn't help. She is not willing to park away from home and she doesn't think its safe to walk on her own early in the morning with no streetlights.

She is making me more poorly. I am now having to sleep a bit in the afternoon due go being disturbed and as a result am missing out on me time.

What can I do about it? I'm fed up of her selfish behaviour.

I have spoken to her and told her about my health issues and have asked her to consider changing her working hours, replace her car...

You've made these demands and are calling her selfish for not agreeing?

Shheeesh

What is this, Quora? This is not a serious question, surely?

Are you for real ? Get ear plugs

You're lucky she's the only one that disturbs you.

This made me laugh. Why don’t you just move house @Fedupandgrumpy1 ? Problem solved.

You are being VERY unreasonable and entitled.

Make friends with your neighbours.

Jesus wept. YAB completely, totally and utterly U and really need a reality check.

are you neurodivergent @Fedupandgrumpy1 ?

I think some posters are being a little harsh. As they have children I would imagine these shifts work well for them to help juggle childcare. The job is likely not well paid so i doubt they are stashing thousands away.
Have you thought about bringing your bedtime forward to 16.00 so you can get 12 hours uninterrupted sleep?
Can you gift them a can of wd40? Or lend then your car?
Sending thoughts and prayers x

Good attempt, but not good enough.

Here for the deletion message cos no way is this real

I don't think you have any idea how ridiculous you sound! I know the answer I'd be giving if you suggested any of those to me.

Your neighbour has to earn a living, she probably doesn't wish to start that early but if that's what it takes to put food on the table then so be it.

Do you plan on buying her a less creaky car? Not everybody has the means to make such a major purchase & she might prefer to spend her money otherwise, not that its any of your business.

Please do not expect to put another female to put her personal safety at risk so that you can get a bit more sleep.

Invest in some earplugs & accept that she lives differently to you. Otherwise move.

Now in fairness, I can empathise with you over the car idling before she goes about her day. It drives me to the absolute brink when people just sit with their cars idling.

There’s not much that can actually be done though.

OP, she isn't being selfish and your requests of her were unreasonable.

That said, they only moved in recently. You WILL get used to the noise and will sleep through it. It will be like when people go on holidays to the countryside and bird/animal noises keep them awake - if you lived there you wouldn't notice.

I lived in an apartment once where trash was collected 3 times a week including one recycling day. On trash days the trucks came by stopping and starting from about 4.30 on. On recycling day, people would come by to go through the recycling for cans that had money back on them - that started around 3.30 followed by the trucks.

First week we were "oh my god". Within a month we didn't even notice the noise.

Well, here's me thinking my alcoholic jobless ndn causing noisy havoc to our entire cul-de-sac every other night was tough. But, your neighbours car door creaking when she goes off to earn an honest living at that ungodly hour - well, what an utter bitch she is! 🙄

Jesus wept

I get chronic illness and the need for decent sleep - I'm one of those people. But I can't expect my neighbours lives to revolve around me.

I honestly cannot quite believe you demanded she buy a new car and change her hours because her car door creaks and she has to warm it up for 5 mins.

Be thankful you're not having to get up at that time yourself to earn low earnings (to the extent you can't just go out and buy a new car on a neighbours demand!) and keep your kids fed and a roof over their heads.

Get a grip OP. Or go and move out into to the rural sticks where you don't have any neighbours. Just be sure to put a big sign up outside demanding the wildlife change their routines and not wake you up before 11am with their selfish noises!

I'm not sure what a reverse is but I am being serious. I don't choose to be poorly, but she can choose her job.

Good lord! No you didn’t choose to be chronically I’ll, but why does that mean your neighbour can choose her job? Maybe you’ve never worked so you don’t understand about working. She’s getting up at a godawful hour, and paying her taxes.

You are very unreasonable and selfish, to boot.

Someone please tell me this bullshit is a joke??

@Prinnny this made me chuckle! 🤣

I don't know what world you live in but it isn't the real one!

You have no idea what calls she has on her income!

OP - who do you live with? Do you have any friends or family around? Have you said any of this to them?

Sounds like you’re the selfish one - you are being ridiculous and so detached from reality if this is true

You can't expect her to change her working hours. Get some ear plugs and take some kalms so you stay asleep longer.

Can't help but think this has been written by the woman with the car and grossly exaggerated and embellished

OP I can't believe you actually said She is making me more poorly.

I really feel for her, just moved house with 3 kids to what may be a new area for them, having to get up at silly-o'clock to work varying shifts only to discover she's got a very unreasonable neighbour making batshit requests.
Asking her to park her car in a road away from the house would have been bad enough on its own but seriously, changing her working hours? replace her car?
In what universe would either of those things be reasonable?
Bonkers.

How about fitting another layer of double glazing? There must be other noises that disturb you if you usually ned to sleep until quite late in the morning. Maybe some DIY secondary glazing? Can you change bedroom?
I voted YABU because you are asking too much of your neighbour, but it's a real problem for you so worth seeing if there is anything you can do.

Troll maybe?

This post is actually really amusing, surely it cannot be real 😂