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AIBU?

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Original poster

Are we classed as "poor" or average

341 replies

FutureMrsBourne · 17/09/2023 17:25

Sorry I couldn't think of a better word.
DH earns around £70k.
I only earn £12ph and work 3 days a week as we have 2 children under 5.
Most of my friends are on slightly more than me an hour but not massively, have maybe slightly nicer but similar houses, only really get their hair done in terms of beauty.. but most of DH's friends partners earn £50+.. have big houses with cinema rooms, bars.. have regular Botox, lip fillers etc.
we live in a 3 bed and semi and have saved since 2018 for a new kitchen.
Are we poor.. or average? I feel such a failure compared to DH's friends wives and I worked bloody hard for my qualifications that are rubbish pay!

OP posts:
Thread gallery
8
PonyPatter44 · 18/09/2023 18:34

GoryBory · 18/09/2023 18:30

I earn £250k a year and my DH earns £300k a year.

Does this make us poor or average?

I’m guessing poor, as Kim Kardashian lives in a massive mansion and we only live in a medium sized one 😢

Plebs.

Sennelier1 · 18/09/2023 18:40

What your DP's collegues'wives have/own/do....is that your aim in life? Botox, lip fillers, a pool etc.? I know it's not on my wishlist 😊 Because if you're happy the way you and your family live, remember that Botox is a poison, lip fillers are tacky, and a home pool needs a lót of maintenance

minimonkey11 · 18/09/2023 18:54

Our household income would put us into your friend’s bracket and we live normally- no botox, cinema rooms or turkey teeth- and live in a semi! I imagine they have debts.

TrixieMixie · 18/09/2023 18:54

I don’t think lack of money is your biggest problem….. catch yourself on

CoffeeMama1 · 18/09/2023 18:55

Lol you're well off. Like, if you manage money properly you don't have to worry, that's a privilege.

Toomuchtrouble4me · 18/09/2023 18:57

£12 an hour is shite. £70k is ok, neither poor nor rich but on your combined salary I would struggle, esp if you need childcare. What did you work hard at to get £12 an hour?

Barbiesback · 18/09/2023 18:59

@Toomuchtrouble4me you sound like a shitty person how can you have the audacity to be so cruel? Disgusting of you. £12 per hour IS dome people's reality and frankly it doesn't really need justifying. Lots of caring and support people will be working hard earning that.

venus7 · 18/09/2023 19:00

FutureMrsBourne · 17/09/2023 17:32

@pinkpanther2023 if my wage was pro rata to full time I would only be on around £20k too x

But it's not just you, is it? You asked 'are we poor?
Really, really tone deaf.

TickyTacky · 18/09/2023 19:05

Collectively you earn 83k a year. Free school meals cut off at 16k - slightly over your part time wage. That's poor. How nasty & spiteful of you.

conunddrum · 18/09/2023 19:08

IFS comparison site suggests your household is in the top 12% of UK households income wise. I'm not sure how you can have momentarily considered that you are poor. This is based on an annual council tax of 2550 (I guessed) but it won't change much if your council tax is more.

https://ifs.org.uk/tools_and_resources/where_do_you_fit_in#tool-results-section

Your household's income : Where do you fit in? | Institute for Fiscal Studies

When you think about your income, do you feel rich, poor, or just plain average? Find out where you lie in the UK income distribution.

https://ifs.org.uk/tools_and_resources/where_do_you_fit_in#tool-results-section

Comedycook · 18/09/2023 19:13

Toomuchtrouble4me · 18/09/2023 18:57

£12 an hour is shite. £70k is ok, neither poor nor rich but on your combined salary I would struggle, esp if you need childcare. What did you work hard at to get £12 an hour?

This comment is really unpleasant...you may earn more but you certainly lack class.

GoryBory · 18/09/2023 19:35

TickyTacky · 18/09/2023 19:05

Collectively you earn 83k a year. Free school meals cut off at 16k - slightly over your part time wage. That's poor. How nasty & spiteful of you.

I can’t help but feel they are a troll or at least I hope they are, if not they need a serious reality check.

No one would use the word ‘poor’ in this situation unless they were trolling or seriously deluded.

Agehdidbfkgjsgwgzbzk · 18/09/2023 19:38

I would say your poor if that’s what you class as living a good life providing for your family is far more rich than having a lip filler 😂😂

ginandtonicwithlimes · 18/09/2023 19:47

Where I live is very deprived. Come up here and get some bloody perspective.

ginandtonicwithlimes · 18/09/2023 19:50

Toomuchtrouble4me · 18/09/2023 18:57

£12 an hour is shite. £70k is ok, neither poor nor rich but on your combined salary I would struggle, esp if you need childcare. What did you work hard at to get £12 an hour?

The care worker wiping your arse when you are old and crinkly will be on that and they will have more class than you.

Johnnylewis · 18/09/2023 20:03

I got as far as "DH earns about 70K" 🤣

Yes OP you are really impoverished.

Mulberrytree20 · 18/09/2023 20:03

Your asking if a household income of 70k is poor? Think you need to read the room and take a look around!

Callipygion · 18/09/2023 20:05

If I had a £70k income I'd feel like a f* millionaire!

BluePinkTrees · 18/09/2023 20:07

You are rich OP.

If the comparisons bother you then move somewhere cheaper and mix more with poorer friends. Research shows people are happier if they are just slightly richer then their neighbours.

NotAMug · 18/09/2023 20:09

A household isn't rich if bringing in £85k but definitely we'll above average.

Obviously not poor, that's ridiculous.

WhitewitchYorkshire · 18/09/2023 20:17

I’m sorry that you measure your “success “ in material terms..before you wish for something, look at the happiness of those who possess all that stuff. Your happiness should come from within.

ActDottie · 18/09/2023 20:20

This is such a tasteless post your household income is way above average

LalaPaloosa · 18/09/2023 20:28

Do you live in London? I think £70k isn’t enough if you live in London. No £700k houses in London either. Outside of London is no doubt a different story

Gingernan · 18/09/2023 20:30

Try being a pensioner still maintaining a family home for 'returning' adult kids.
It doesn't do to compare yourself to others and getting dissatisfied over silly things like Botox.

ConsuelaHammock · 18/09/2023 20:32

You are an above average earning household. What you have to ask yourself is ‘Am I happy?’
Do you want a cinema room and Botox ? Stuff like that won’t make you any happier than you already are . You aren’t worrying about food and bills with your salary. You are a lot better off than a huge percentage of the population. It can be impossible to work out someone’s household income just by their jobs. Lots of people have savings and investments, perhaps they have another property they rent out. Not everyone will be living on just their salary.