To expect to have my own seat in the lounge?

[seahorseyo]

Dh and I have always had places we sit, I sit on one end of a massive corner sofa and he sits in the middle where it makes an L and that been the way for years.
Adult DS moved back home recently after living with a partner for 7 years (longer than we've lived in this house or had this sofa) and sits in my seat, I used to ask him to move up but he seems to like that seat (as I do ) because there's a table and charging port so argues he can sit there if nobody's in it.
But even if I'm not in it I'm only up for a minute pottering about and then he's in my seat again.

AIBU do other people have their seats in the house or am I selfish as he pays his way and it should be first come first serve?

Only if the son is a NEET, without SN.

No, why would it?

Because it was literally your entire justification for getting the seat you want even if another member of the household is using it. I'm not "reading" anything apart from your own reasoning. You are the bill payer and therefore you get what you want.

I just wondered if that justification would fly with a working man and a SAHM because I had a feeling that it wouldn't and it seems I was right. A couple may have decorated the house for their convenience, but that to me seems more of a reason to give some slack to the person who didn't get a say in what was convenient for them. And anyway that's got nothing to do with money.

I probably don't get it because I'm not territorial over seats so I don't need reasons to turf people at my will.

YABU to call a sitting room a lounge (I assumed you were talking about airports in your thread title), but YANBU not to want to be ousted from your seat by a returning adult child.

Growing up we always had our own seats and if we had visitors we were relegated to the floor. I moved back home for a few months around 5 years ago and I was straight back to my usual seat which has the worst view of the tv still sat there even when my parents went on holiday so I’d definitely say he’s BU, if my mum got up to do something for a few mins and one of us pinched her seat she’d probably kick us out

My parents and grandparents always called it the lounge. 🤣

The poor lad has just come out of a 7-year relationship and has to now live in someone else’s house. Let the poor lad sit where he wants!

There's about 8 other seats to choose from him!

What do you call two rooms such as living room and dining room turned into one long room? A through-sitting room?

Lounge is fine.

Why would you call it a through anything? It's a living room.

Because it's a term for two rooms knocked into one.

Only on an estate agents details, surely? Nobody talks about going into the "through room" in their own house.

"Second class people" made me laugh but encapsulates my annoyance and frustration at my mum doing this as well

Just wanted to commiserate above though. In this case think maaaybe it's different as DC only moved back in as an adult?

No, people do refer to it as that. There’s even threads on it.

You may not and that’s fine.

I hate this. FIL is like this and is horrible about it. Sit where you like in my house. I don’t make my children move just so I can sit down exactly where they are sitting. There’s 6 of us and 8 sitting ‘spaces’, so plenty to go around, and then there’s always the floor with cushions.

I think everyone I know has their own spot on the sofa. If the person isn't going to be sitting in it then fine but if they are then u just don't sit there. It's all about respect.

Because it was literally your entire justification for getting the seat you want even if another member of the household is using it. I'm not "reading" anything apart from your own reasoning. You are the bill payer and therefore you get what you want.

If my child was using it - we were discussing a child taking their parent's seat - a seat known to be my preferred seat, in my house, that I pay the bills for. They are perfectly welcome to pick any other seat as their preferred seat and stage it so it is comfortable for themselves.

I'm a single mother - when I wasn't, my ex had a preferred seat too - hell, my parents have a preferred seat when they visit my house, and I would automatically leave those to them too (as they habitually avoid the one they know is mine)

Because we're polite to each other, and comfortable, and creatures of habit and happy to accommodate that for each other.

And yes, I think that my children should honour that, just as I honour their preferences as a rule, but if they don't I will pull rank.

Yes we have our set seats here but only me and young adult son and never take each other's seats. Tell him this is your seat and has been for years and you love having him home but one rule is that is your seat. Is there not an armchair he can sit on. He needs to respect your seat full stop.

We have 3 sofas in our main living room/sunroom, DH’s, mine and the dog’s sofa at the other end of the room.

DS has his own sofa in his own sitting room where he does his homework, plays computer games, plays his instruments and watches his TV. He rarely sits with us in the evening but if he does, he usually sits at the other end of DH’s sofa as it’s parallel to the TV. Occasionally, DS plonks in my space but I usually tickle him then he moves to the other sofa. 😂

I always lie across my sofa to watch TV, so find it strange to sit forwards in it with my feet on the floor and only do this when we have guests.

Yeah, kick him out of it. When he says "oh but no one was sitting here" you say "tough shit, my house, my sofa, now move..please" 😅

Oh did you aye

And he says "tough shit, make me" because he's just as much of a talking tough guy.

You remember when your parents were all authoritarian and "because I say so" and "because I pay the bills" and thought they were so cool and badass?

Yes I did, Mrs Sceptical.

I'd call that a sitting room. Unless it's entirely a dining room, in which case I'd call it a dining room.

Or maybe a drawing room, depending on which other rooms are available.

In a normal house, though, a sitting room is a sitting room. Lounges are what you find in hotels and airports.

If my mum told me, tough shit my house, then I would say fair play and move. Because I'm not a child...