To consider the sex industry so I can spend more time with my DC

[ofcourseivenced]

I'm currently employed doing shift work, 4 12 hour shifts a week. I always knew I didn't want to be working so much when I had DC so I set out on becoming self employed. Turns out it's significantly more challenging and time consuming than I anticipated, and so I'm still not making any money as of yet. When DC was a baby I felt I had more time to pursue said self employment, during naps, in the evenings, and it was easier to find childcare as DC didn't require much stimulation. Now DC is a full throttle, mummy obsessed toddler who needs outings, constant supervision and sleeps considerably less, I naturally have less time to do work. There's also the huge amounts of guilt I'm carrying by feeling like I'm absent so much, even though I keep trying to tell myself it'll pay off when I no longer have to do shift work and instead can work remotely for short periods of time.

I don't actually remember where I got the idea from for making content for niche fetishes, but from curious research it seems like there is money to be made if you're attractive in certain ways and you know how to market your stuff. An old girlfriend of a friend allegedly made a few grand a month, which even 2/3rds of would be enough for me to stay afloat.

AIBU to even consider getting involved in this? I would attempt to remain anonymous wherever possible as have no desire to do it other than for "easier" money (by easier I mean doesn't require 48+ hours a week commitment at set times). I just want to be able to spend more time with my DC while they're young.

@BloodyHellKen exactly!!! Normalising any part of sex industry is really bad for vulnerable women.

Come on people this stuff isn't that hard.

This is genuinely terrifying. Jesus Christ.

Oh my God, how can you believe this shit? I am imagining you as a ventriloquist’s dummy, mouthing the words a prostitute-using man is speaking for you!

Selling sex is not ‘ controlling your sexuality’. Freely having sex because you enjoy it, with people you like and who like you, is being in charge of your sexuality. Not having sex with people you wouldn’t be shagging if they weren’t paying and you didn’t need the cash!

Jesus! How can being so poor or constrained in your life that you need to sell your body be reframed as ‘being in charge of your sexuality’!

How can women be so naive as to buy into this man-serving shit!

Because my sexuality belongs to me and me ONLY, and I’ll choose whatever the hell I want to do with it, that includes shagging a tinder guy, attending a wild orgy or opening an only fans account if that’s what I want.

It’s not your sexuality if you are on Only Fans. The purchaser is the one feeding his sexuality, not you.

I fundamentally don’t agree with the ultra individualistic, ultra free market capitalist position you are taking. Because your actions don’t just affect you. They affect all women if we live in a society which endorses a view that man can purchase entitlement to women’s bodies. It affects all women if men view women like this.

@BloodyHellKen have a Google at this - it is not as it reads- it is legal in Germany and therefore you can be offered jobs but have every right to refuse or not be interested with no impact.

You need to be realistic.

Disregard most of the stuff on here. How attractive are you? What are your boundaries? How much cash is enough and how do you want to work?

I had a very happy 20s paying for massages/handjobs. Because I had a high disposable income I was dropping £400-500 for an hour long massage with happy ending. This was with adult film stars/ aspiring model types.

If you have the looks, can keep a level head I reckon you could do quite well out of it.

Misses the point spectacularly!!!
The normalisation of this means that a vulnerable woman in a bad situation will feel she has no choice.

JFC

JFC, the government should not be suggesting women sell their bodies to men!

And yes there absolutely is an impact of the government offering this as an option to women.

Like anything it's a sliding scale though. Although I am a realist, the women I had giving me hand jobs didn't like me but obviously felt that dislike was worth the 500. Not every prostitute is a trafficked heroin addled type who was forced to work. Some just see it as an unpleasant job which pays well and allows them means beyond what they could normally earn

Would never judge. You do what you need to do. I hope you do well in your choice and keep safe and happy.

I wonder if men are offered a chance to work as prostitutes...I mean there's probably not much of a market for men from women but I'm sure some other men would be willing to pay them for sex. I mean, let's keep it fair.

Wait what? you think that being against a mother who is considering prostituting herself as a way to earn a living is "pearl clutching"........wow!!! maybe it's got something to do with standards, maybe we're shocked at how far they've fallen.....

It's surprisingly hard to make money doing low level sex work. If you do go ahead with it I would advise to start slowly and expect not to make much. It takes A LOT of time and mental energy to even talk to the people who want to buy from you then you add on making the content (even with just selling knickers / socks etc), which has to be pretty regular and you could end up working more hours than you do now. Some people that "make it" in the industry can earn a lot and they obviously then can pick and choose hours and talking etc but as a new starter, it's hard.. and I'm open minded but it's quite grim most of the time. No judgement here but prepare yourself OP.

Wow!! Absolutely perfect comment!!!
Meanwhile over on the other thread you can read all about the women whose marriages and family lives are being destroyed because their husbands are watching porn and are seeing girls on only fans!! Chances are whilst enriching their family life they're destroying someone elses!! Normalising prostitution means that by the time their daughter's grow up they'll either be doing it or being destroyed by it and the vicious cycle just gets worse!. To every action there is an equal and opposite reaction!!
Society resides in the gutter and I'm shocked at how low some of these woman will stoop for an easy buck

You have a job that pays your bills. Fantastic, means you are doing better than many. You and children are struggling with separation anxiety. Yes thats entirely normal, its hard but by consistently demonstrating to your children that mummy works and needs to work to pay for life is excellent role modeling and as they grow up they wil be really proud that they have a strong parent who works hard and provides for them. You'll instill in them a strong work ethic. In school they can tell their peers what mum's job is and talk about you with pride. You say you spend 2.5 days doing self employed stuff that makes no money. Instead invest that time in distance learning to improve your qualifications and help you progress in mainstream work.

How would you explain your alternative to your children? Yeah mummy now doesn't go to work but we now have this improved standard of living? What will that teach them? Certainly won't help them develop their own work ethic.

In reality, we'd all love to earn tons of money for doing little and spending time as much time as we can with our kids whilst they are small, but life isn't like that.

@Emz6103 Meanwhile over on the other thread you can read all about the women whose marriages and family lives are being destroyed because their husbands are watching porn and are seeing girls on only fans!!

This ^

You read about this all the time here and it's other women on this site who devot hours of their time dishing out advise to help stifle such behaviour and condition by such men! We women are one of the biggest enablers to this kind of behaviour - whether it through the way we raise out boys or the accepting of such behaviour from our partners .

Thanks but TBH I really don't think the government or anyone else should be suggesting sex work as a viable employment option whether it's compulsory to accept or not.

I find the whole concept sickening.

@BloodyHellKen to be honest neither do I but this seems quite a while ago. I have never read about this anywhere else - will ask my German friend- in Germany!

Would the saying the same to your 19 year old daughter who wants to drop out of uni to do this?

Men cheating on their families for porn/only fans is solely on them. If they lack self control it's their issue.

I haven't seen a escort since I met my now wife and have managed to maintain that a good 20 years, neither have I felt the urge to.

The two are mutually exclusive. Monogamy is just that and yo should honour what you are signing up for regardless of what's available around you

How many films in recent years have centred around the story of male strippers and shown it as acceptable entertainment? Full Monty or Magic Mike come immediately to mind. I'm sure there are many more but not a genre I look for.

How many ladies on here have giggled at a male stripper at a birthday or hen do. How many have attended Chippendale style shows.

You are aware there are male performers on OF too?

The double standards on here is absolutely shocking.

How many parents on here are completely unaware that their 19 year old university daughter is doing exactly that for money to enjoy life with.

Irrelevant.

I'm saying if her daughter asked her advice and thoughts on working in the sex industry, would she be supportive and say things like "DD I hope you do well in your choice and keep safe and happy darling!!"

I'm going to go ahead and say that wouldn't happen.