I don’t seem to have a say in naming my baby

[Littlemissdj]

Keen to hear other perspectives..

I am 36 weeks pregnant tomorrow with my first baby. DP has 2 DC from a previous relationship, A DD 16 and DS 13.

Since we found out we are having a girl, I have had 2 top contenders with names which I’ve liked for years and always thought I would use them. DP hasn’t suggested any names yet. My first choice, DP has now said no to because his DD said it sounds similar to her name. Let’s say the name I wanted was Mia and his DDs name is Maliah. He also feels like his DD will feel replaced. My second choice he said no because one of his cousins is called that name.

We got into a small argument over this and he said I am not being fair if I select either name.

AIBU to go with the names or shall I just keep thinking of some? I’ve ruled out a lot.

Are you even living with this man? You say you have sent him several names to consider but he says no or doesn’t respond?

He actually has no say whatsoever in what you call your baby, unless you are married, so he has no ability to “decline” anything.

Whilst I agree that your DD shouldn’t have a name overly similar to her sibling, I would call her the cousins name, possibly the deceased siblings name, then your last name. If DP kicks off, the middle name would be changed to one of my liking too.

You sound pretty downtrodden OP.

Two of my kids have the same sounding names (first part of the name is the same sound). I'm on your OHs side on that one as two similar names is cute at first but oh dear god does it get irritating and I get them mixed up. Named my third son something completely different 😬.

Cousin is not a god enough reason.

daughter you can maybe spin it as cute and matching and a way to pull together and round out the family, but be careful! - what the other stepchild’s name, you may need to go close if you have a second one if you use this tactic.

overall sounds like a red flag on your baby daddy! Maybe take a check on any others that may or may not exist. And I’d also agree with those others hoping you give the baby your last name. Also look into your parental rights, and if or if not you want his name on the birth certificate.

You are mom. He can’t veto names, or just your surname. If he’s not participating in this he shouldn’t get a say. Try talking to him why he’s not excited and involved!

don’t taylor everything to him! You are in here too!!

if he is choosing middle name, you get to choose first name!! And last name is mamma’s if you’re not married!!!