Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Husband's Colleague- Leg Pic.

532 replies

PeaceGoodMercutio · 04/09/2023 08:51

DH 38 was sent a holiday picture of very posed "sausage leg" type picture from female work colleague (late 50s). Right up to the bikini line. His response was "A bit jealous, but wait til I get to my room".
I think this reads a certain way.
What do you think?
For context, we were on holiday too in a very nice hotel that he had been bragging about to her in previous messages. He says he was just going to show her pics of our room.
He never did. Messages stop there.
My mum says it isn't suspicious and believes him as apparently pictures like this are common amongst her 50 year old friends.
My friend says it is suspicious as feck.

Aibu:
Yes- innocent messages.
No--suspicious messages.

OP posts:
Thread gallery
6
HoneyPotts · 04/09/2023 11:10

This is genuinely the only time I’ve agreed with the OP contacting the other woman’s partner and the OP gets criticised?

It’s great that we are all different and tolerate different things in our marriage.

Hope you’re doing ok OP x

JaiynDough · 04/09/2023 11:11

PeaceGoodMercutio · 04/09/2023 08:51

DH 38 was sent a holiday picture of very posed "sausage leg" type picture from female work colleague (late 50s). Right up to the bikini line. His response was "A bit jealous, but wait til I get to my room".
I think this reads a certain way.
What do you think?
For context, we were on holiday too in a very nice hotel that he had been bragging about to her in previous messages. He says he was just going to show her pics of our room.
He never did. Messages stop there.
My mum says it isn't suspicious and believes him as apparently pictures like this are common amongst her 50 year old friends.
My friend says it is suspicious as feck.

Aibu:
Yes- innocent messages.
No--suspicious messages.

I read that as he'll have wank over it when he gets back...

Original poster
PeaceGoodMercutio · 04/09/2023 11:11

I'm ignoring my husband.
Then she rang and texted.
I ignored them both.
She continued to ring, so I messaged her husband.
She has stopped ringing me.
I promise you I did not call her. I don't want to speak to her.

OP posts:
AmazingSnakeHead · 04/09/2023 11:12

What did the text say?

Stroopwaffels · 04/09/2023 11:12

PeaceGoodMercutio · 04/09/2023 09:09

I didn't reply.
I asked him and he was very defensive and said he was just going to show her how nice our room was.
Which I think sounds like bullshit.

That's the way I read it - your holiday might be nice, but wait until you see photos of my room!

HoneyPotts · 04/09/2023 11:13

EvelynKatie · 04/09/2023 11:10

Really surprised that so many people seem to think the exchange is completely innocent!

They don’t, but they are following the other posters that are bashing the OP and don’t want to miss the opportunity of being part of a pile on. Despite the photos and messages obviously being inappropriate.

PeppermintMandy · 04/09/2023 11:14

Sueveneers · 04/09/2023 10:58

Messaging her partner does not mean she is going to leave her husband, ffs, that's an over-reaction. But her partner needs to know what she's doing. She deserved it.

Show quote history

“Needs to know what she’s doing”??? 😂 She isn’t doing anything!

She isn’t going to leave her husband but she’s just going to blow up their marriage, a strangers relationship and her husbands career but somehow they’ll still stay married, yeah sounds good.

She’s talking about “not protecting him” because a women he works with sent ONE photo of her KNEES on holiday & that was it. That’s literally it. A super, super so stereotypically common holiday photos that it literally has a name… “hotdog legs”.

This is unhinged behaviour.

OhmygodDont · 04/09/2023 11:15

Why did she start messaging you if you hadn’t even messaged her husband at that point.

Smelly fishy alone. Why’s your husband given her your number. Damage control I think.

diddl · 04/09/2023 11:16

PeaceGoodMercutio · 04/09/2023 10:40

I've messaged her partner and it has all gone a bit quiet.

What did you say "I think this was meant for you"?

Chippy4me · 04/09/2023 11:17

Why would you not speak to her?

This is a massive over reaction over something that could have a perfectly reasonable explanation.

Its almost like you don’t want to hear it in case you are wrong.

The first thing I would be doing is speaking to DH and then I’d speak to her straight after.

It’s odd that you’ve gone straight to her DH before speaking to her.

Sueveneers · 04/09/2023 11:17

PeppermintMandy · 04/09/2023 11:14

“Needs to know what she’s doing”??? 😂 She isn’t doing anything!

She isn’t going to leave her husband but she’s just going to blow up their marriage, a strangers relationship and her husbands career but somehow they’ll still stay married, yeah sounds good.

She’s talking about “not protecting him” because a women he works with sent ONE photo of her KNEES on holiday & that was it. That’s literally it. A super, super so stereotypically common holiday photos that it literally has a name… “hotdog legs”.

This is unhinged behaviour.

Edited
Show quote history

Right up to the bikini line.

Yeah, so innocent.

The woman is the one who is unhinged.

Namechangedagain20 · 04/09/2023 11:18

Stroopwaffels · 04/09/2023 11:12

That's the way I read it - your holiday might be nice, but wait until you see photos of my room!

Show quote history

I read it this way too. I think it was just poor wording on his part that left it a bit ambiguous. I think you’ve been massively over the top in texting her partner OP.

Sweepies · 04/09/2023 11:18

PeppermintMandy · 04/09/2023 10:45

This thread is insane.

No, your husband is not wanking in your hotel room over a woman in her 50s knees 🙄

Why would he say “jealous” if he wasn’t referring to her being on holiday by the pool?

He clearly meant he was going to send photos of the room not “I’m away to wank over your knees” ffs.

The fact that he didn’t actually send them means nothing. Maybe he knew it was a bit of a weird thing for her to do so he politely replied in a jokey way then got on with his holiday.

The old “sausage legs” photo is such a stereotypical “I’m on holiday, aren’t you jealous” photo. I‘m sure if she was trying to seduce him she could come up with something a bit more enticing than a bog standard hotdog legs pics you see all the time on social media.

Ignore people hamming it up as a “crotch photo”…it is not.

Edited

Most sense this entire thread. Sausage leg pic is the classic "Look how amazing my holiday is" thing that so many people do. His reply just reads of banter. "I'm jealous - I am going to come back with a holiday pic to make you more jealous" which he probably forgot to do. The fact you messaged her partner is bonkers, they probably both think your nuts. The picture sounds nondescript and his reply isn't creepy lmao. If he'd said "Corrrr, nice pins!! On my way to my room to rub one out" then perhaps you'd have some argument.

CaroleSinger · 04/09/2023 11:18

So what if the whole point of her picture was just to show that she was on a luxury holiday by a pool and he was a bit jealous of that, and his response actually was intended to mean he was going to show her a picture of the resort he is staying in? And him and her now both ringing you was to explain that, and the rest is a huge over reaction?

AnObserverInThisDarkWorld · 04/09/2023 11:18

Like if she's sent a picture of her legs on the bed with a towel on and she wasn't on holiday then yes, that's inappropriate

But a standard holiday photo? Google hot dog legs and a good majority will show the "crotch area" as some are saying.

You're ruining 2 relationships and potentially 2 careers over that and nothing else? No other messages or hints of anything going on?

OP you are a stirrer

minipie · 04/09/2023 11:19

That's the way I read it - your holiday might be nice, but wait until you see photos of my room!

I agree tbh. I think if he meant “going to enioy this photo later in my room” he’d have phrased it differently, and also not let you use his phone.

I think it’s a misjudged or possibly flirty photo from the colleague and a carelessly phrased bantery response from your husband.

Poor man is probably mortified that you’ve contacted the partner.

ICanBuyMyOwnBooks · 04/09/2023 11:19

This makes no sense.

You were worried your DH was being inappropriate because he's her boss and then you call/message her partner?! How do you think HR will look at that?

But considering it's escalated so much in just a few hours, I'm guessing there are still schools on holiday.

ShowersOfShite · 04/09/2023 11:19

MerryBeard · 04/09/2023 09:42

My mum says it isn't suspicious and believes him as apparently pictures like this are common amongst her 50 year old friends.

50 something women really punctuate their days with sending photos of their legs to colleagues? Relief at missing this life stage floods through me.

I don't think it's even just 50s, I've friends in their 20s who, when on holiday post photos of their legs on a beach/sun bed to friends and family. It's not unusual over summer to see several in a short space. I've seen men do it too.

AmazingSnakeHead · 04/09/2023 11:19

I don't think the woman's relationship will be ruined. If it really is innocent, she'll be able to show that she has sent it to lots of other people, and not just her younger male boss.

Sueveneers · 04/09/2023 11:19

AnObserverInThisDarkWorld · 04/09/2023 11:18

Like if she's sent a picture of her legs on the bed with a towel on and she wasn't on holiday then yes, that's inappropriate

But a standard holiday photo? Google hot dog legs and a good majority will show the "crotch area" as some are saying.

You're ruining 2 relationships and potentially 2 careers over that and nothing else? No other messages or hints of anything going on?

OP you are a stirrer

It is NEVER appropriate to send your married boss a photo all the way up to the crotch area. Wtf is wrong with you people?!

It's the woman who is blowing up relationships, not the OP who had the good sense to nip it in the bud.

PeppermintMandy · 04/09/2023 11:20

Sueveneers · 04/09/2023 11:17

Right up to the bikini line.

Yeah, so innocent.

The woman is the one who is unhinged.

Show quote history

Oh no!!! The bikini line?? You mean the same one everyone else sat around the pool was seeing?

Give your head a wobble. Again, completely standard, and not remotely sexy, for a hotdog legs pic.

AnObserverInThisDarkWorld · 04/09/2023 11:21

Sueveneers · 04/09/2023 11:08

It was more than that. Read the OP's posts.

Show quote history

I have
That's what it was

Sueveneers · 04/09/2023 11:21

PeppermintMandy · 04/09/2023 11:20

Oh no!!! The bikini line?? You mean the same one everyone else sat around the pool was seeing?

Give your head a wobble. Again, completely standard, and not remotely sexy, for a hotdog legs pic.

Show quote history

Wow. Delusional. I'm not the one who needs to give their head a wobble.

FFS.

Adelaff · 04/09/2023 11:21

I think his explanation sounds plausible, but I'm not wholly convinced.

I think she's out of line for sending him the picture in the first place. I'd be telling him he needs to distance himself from this person as she isn't the 'friend' he thinks she is.

NeunundneunzigHorseBallonz · 04/09/2023 11:22

Sounds very suspicious now.