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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

My partner's uninvited guest has turned up 5 hours early...

581 replies

Cynicaltheorist · 31/08/2023 14:03

My partner is involved in organising an event tomorrow and was cornered into offering a bed tonight for a person who's coming fro a distance. He doesn't know this guy. There have been a number of increasingly infuriating phone calls about arrival times etc. This bloke seems chaotic and doesn't seem to be able to manage directions. I've been really, really busy for the last week and a guest was the last thing I needed. I insisted that this man doesn't arrive before my partner is home from work at 7pm, by which time I will (probably) have finished what I need to do and be in a fit state to host.

The guy has just phoned to say he's a few minutes from our home. He phoned my partner and my partner told him he can come straight here. I'm right in the middle of my work, I haven't had a shower this morning and the breakfast things are still all over the kitchen. I'm so angry with my partner. He's always doing things like this. This guy is going to arrive shortly, he's told me he hasn't had any lunch so presumably will expect me to make him a sandwich. Who the hell turns up five hours early? So bloody rude and entitled.

OP posts:
CrabbiesGingerBeer · 03/09/2023 08:03

MrsGrumpyKnickers · 03/09/2023 07:57

Why couldn’t he stay in a local hotel or b&b? Surely that would be better for him as he must feel embarrassed putting on you like this….

Except if you read the OP’s update posts, he clearly doesn’t feel embarrassed in the slightest…..

Greenberg2 · 03/09/2023 08:09

VibrantThingie · 02/09/2023 14:01

Very odd convoluted sort of feminism / equality that has been sold to some women.

The only people benefiting from this situation are the two men.
OP has presented herself as the lamb to the slaughter.
OP would prefer to feel like a lion instead, so would rather roar at a forum full of fellow women trying to support her.

Some of us have met and been harmed by enabling women like this, women who have no concept of solidarity or their own personal sovereignty and boundaries. Instead, they try to integrate you into their own 1950’s downtrodden woman brainwashing, to the detriment of both parties.

Wake up.

Edited
Show quote history

Lol!

Loving this! Honestly I can’t stand it when OPs focus on a couple of replies and use them to berate everyone. It’s so yawn.

And to blame sex based inequality rather than the two men perpetrating said inequality and actually do something about it…

PJsAndRainyDays · 03/09/2023 09:23

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

AsMyGranWouldSay · 17/04/2024 07:31

scoobysnaxx · 02/09/2023 15:02

This thread is absolutely mad. I've just read it. Bonkers.

You initially had my sympathy OP.

All of that's gone now.

PP was right. You do sound as insufferable as your husband. Reek of internalised misogyny.

It's MAD to think you'd criticise women for not being okay with letting strange men into their home that neither they or their husband know, alone. What the fuck?

And the venom with which you said it. You're almost as mad with the women who commented about safety etc. Why the hell would this aggravate you the way it did? What's that about? I think you need to have a think about what triggers you 😂

And don't you dare insult women for being smart and careful and not letting strange men into their homes alone (Yes he is a strange man. A work colleague neither you or your husband has met is indeed, a strange man).

Don't you dare equate being smart and realistic and sensible with being weak and a victim of scaremongering. How utterly INSANE!

What is toxic and dangerous is your attitude. You've basically said that any women who doesn't have the confidence or will to put themselves willingly in a potentially risky scenario is weak.

That is truly insane I am speechless.

You did what you did so you got what you got. Don't let strangers who take the piss in your home then! 😂

This! 🤣

CherieBabySpliffUp · 17/04/2024 07:37

Zooooooombie thread!!

Seeleyboo · 17/04/2024 08:20

No way would I allow a strange man lurk around my house while I am alone. You should never put yourself in danger like this. I wouldn't open the door and I would call my husband to come home immediately to entertain his non friend.

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