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Original poster

To take steak for myself to bbq ?

297 replies

Melmi256 · 26/08/2023 19:43

Invited to a bbq … I’m not really a burger hot dog kinda person at all.
Everyone is bringing something, I only really would eat steak from a bbq , can I bring a steak for myself like a veggie would take a veggie burger ? I can’t afford to take steaks for everyone but will bring something else like sides potsto/pasta ?

OP posts:
Aprilx · 27/08/2023 05:54

Curiosity101 · 26/08/2023 20:28

Surely you message the hosts and ask them if they're okay with it? I'd not have any issue with someone bringing a steak to a BBQ I was hosting. Tbf I'd not find it remotely rude if they rocked up with steak either, so long as they brought some excellent other bits and pieces for others to share. But based on other people's replies I'm in the minority, so message them and ask.

How does messaging help? They are hardly going to say “ no you can’t do that because it is rude”. They are going to say of course you can bring a steak for yourself and then think how unbelievably rude and socially inept.

user1492757084 · 27/08/2023 06:08

This would be extremely rude.
Bring the bowls of sides and also some small steak pieces made up as kebebs on sticks to share - some with chicken, some with steak and some with pork would also be okay.
If others choose the steak before you, then your bad luck.

You could eat a sausage or a hamburger at the BBQ and save a steak for yourself, at home.

VictoriaVenkman · 27/08/2023 06:14

Melmi256 · 27/08/2023 04:43

Ok no it’s not my first bbq , I don’t like burgers or hot dogs , chicken I eat but super weird a pot if it’s cooked properly so I won’t eat it’s not about money I’ll happy to take plenty of sides ! I just can’t eat the meat provided ! Bit I also can’t provide 10 steaks … steak can be under cooked and eaten ok but I can’t afford all the steak

Then only eat sides while you are there. You can't take a steak for yourself and get them to cook it. Exceptionally rude.

pimlicopubber · 27/08/2023 06:36

Bring something you can share. You might as well get your own takeaway and just ask your host to heat it up.

You don't like BBQ food, or you only like fancy beef? You don't even eat chicken skewers, halloumi, grilled veggies etc?

Mouse82 · 27/08/2023 06:43

No one would bat an eyelid where i'm from if you byo'd your own steak.

edited to remove extra m from i'm.

Original poster
Melmi256 · 27/08/2023 06:56

Ok ok I’m going to take sides, which id planned anyway ! And maybe 4 steaks and hopefully they will slice them up ? It’s just it’s a large bbq so I can’t take a steak for everyone that would be very expensive! It’s not that I am fancy ! I just don’t like ground meat in buns and bbq chicken I admit I’m worried if it’s cooked properly so can’t eat that ! It I don’t want to eat just side and salad I want to eat meat but I can’t afford 10 steaks 🥩

OP posts:
tttigress · 27/08/2023 06:56

I wouldn't do it personally, but I it is interesting that people are allowed to bring their own stuff if they are a vegan or whatever, but it seems totally off if you are just not a fan of processed meat.

Mikimoto · 27/08/2023 07:02

Are you also going to take a half-bottle of Rioja gran reserva, along with some cans of Carlsberg?

Madeinessex · 27/08/2023 07:05

This happened at a workmates BBQ, she was the host and a colleague turned up with 2 steaks for him and his partner and practically stood over them whilst they cooked so no one else took them by mistake.

There was a certain amount of eye raising went on at the time, but it was the talk of the office for a long time after and even a few years after the event it still got the odd mention should the topic of a BBQ or steak ever come up in general.

CurlewKate · 27/08/2023 07:07

Kebabs is the way forward. And usually the nicest thing on a barbecue anyway!

Purditnin · 27/08/2023 07:08

Melmi256 · 27/08/2023 06:56

Ok ok I’m going to take sides, which id planned anyway ! And maybe 4 steaks and hopefully they will slice them up ? It’s just it’s a large bbq so I can’t take a steak for everyone that would be very expensive! It’s not that I am fancy ! I just don’t like ground meat in buns and bbq chicken I admit I’m worried if it’s cooked properly so can’t eat that ! It I don’t want to eat just side and salad I want to eat meat but I can’t afford 10 steaks 🥩

Why can’t you just eat sides at the barbecue? Have your steak at home.

Cook your own chicken, take it along and bung it in the oven/on the barbecue when you get there.

Make meat and veggie kebabs and take them along.

There are various options that are less awkward than this steak business. Just pick one?

JofraArchersFastestBall · 27/08/2023 07:09

My BIL did this once - we weren't offended, but did laugh at him, which he took in good humour. I guess it depends on the relationship you have with the hosts.

If I was you I'd cut the few steaks up and make kebabs with veggies on too - that way it'll look like there's enough for everyone (and you can just grab a few once they're cooked!)

liveforsummer · 27/08/2023 07:09

Take a pack of steaks and cut them your self rather than expecting hosts to know what you want and do it. Alternatively take a pack of pre cooked chicken thighs or drumsticks- this is what I use on bbq's as they only need to go on for a few minutes to heat up and get the bbq flavour, o worries about the meat being raw. Far cheaper than steak

Original poster
Melmi256 · 27/08/2023 07:13

Right after reading all replies I think it’s a clear no !! I’m not trying to be snobby I’m just not a burger/sausage fan which it’s that type of bbq ! I thought as long as I bring some other sides it would be on to have my own meat …. Clearly not. I like chicken but I’m super paranoid if it’s cooked ok whereas steak can be undercooked!
it’s a big event I cannot bring 20 steaks
i think I’ll bring maybe 3 and a pasta dish and hope I get for steak 🥩 if not I’ll just eat a side dish

OP posts:
Original poster
Melmi256 · 27/08/2023 07:18

Terrysnotmine · 26/08/2023 20:50

Before I give my definitive answer I need a couple of questions answered. Would you be cooking this yourself? And which cut of steak would you take?

@Terrysnotmine fillet ! And not cook myself

OP posts:
ThatSunCreamSmell · 27/08/2023 07:18

I would say bringing 3 steaks for a big bbq is even weirder than 1 tbh.

PPs have suggested making kebabs / skewers so bulking out the steak with veg I think that's the easy solution.

VictoriaVenkman · 27/08/2023 07:19

Melmi256 · 27/08/2023 07:18

@Terrysnotmine fillet ! And not cook myself

Show quote history

That's even worse. Please can you cook my nice juicy steak but you can't have any...

Original poster
Melmi256 · 27/08/2023 07:23

KarmaStar · 27/08/2023 01:56

Yabvu
That's so rude I can't believe you thought of it.
You're saying,without saying, "I'm not eating the cheap food you are providing it's not good enough,this is what I eat " .
Can you imagine cooking dinner for a guest and they upturn their nose and hold out better quality food they had brought just for themselves ?

@KarmaStar i do get this point! It’s not a ori cheap food tho I admit o not a burger sausage fan ! I actually don’t mind chicken or pork which is bbq food but I’m just hyper word about it being cooked properly :( so I can’t eat it whereas steak can’t be under cooked

OP posts:
Purditnin · 27/08/2023 07:26

Melmi256 · 27/08/2023 07:13

Right after reading all replies I think it’s a clear no !! I’m not trying to be snobby I’m just not a burger/sausage fan which it’s that type of bbq ! I thought as long as I bring some other sides it would be on to have my own meat …. Clearly not. I like chicken but I’m super paranoid if it’s cooked ok whereas steak can be undercooked!
it’s a big event I cannot bring 20 steaks
i think I’ll bring maybe 3 and a pasta dish and hope I get for steak 🥩 if not I’ll just eat a side dish

Then cook the chicken yourself.

You’ve been given multiple affordable meat based options that aren’t burgers/sausages that you can make and take along. Why are you so fixated on taking steak?

VisionsOfSplendour · 27/08/2023 07:29

What would be the point of taking 3 steaks that's possibly more daft than taking only 1

Listen to what everyone is telling you and have some meat at home before you go and eat the sides. You're making a big deal out of a non issue

Original poster
Melmi256 · 27/08/2023 07:32

Janieforever · 26/08/2023 22:40

Is this the first time you have been to a bbq? I’m assuming it must be. When everyone brings something it’s multiples, you’re contributing, you don’t just bring something for just you and eat it, it would be very odd.

It’s a social event, a joint meal. I’m sure you must be able to eat other stuff, I simply don’t believe the only thing you can eat is steak, and chicken, seafood, veggie skewers etc, is all stuff you cannot eat. Is that really what you are saying?

@Janieforever no im
not saying I can only eat steak ! But it’s a fairly casual bbq, I don’t eat burger or sausage…. I’m not veggie and unfortunate no seafood at all !!
whilst I eat chicken I can’t eat from bbq as I super worried about undercooked food :( whereas I know steak can be eaten rare but I can’t afford 10 steaks ! I will take sides tho

OP posts:
Loopytiles · 27/08/2023 07:33

It’s pretty fussy to not want to eat sausages, chicken, burgers or just make a meal out of bread and the ‘side dishes’.

Rafting2022 · 27/08/2023 07:34

Just don’t go for Christ’s sake, you sound like a nightmare guest anyway!

ohxmastreeohxmastree · 27/08/2023 07:34

Don’t take 3 steaks OP if it’s a large BBQ as you say, that looks even weirder than just one. If you can’t eat any of the meat that the host has CHOSEN to cook, just take sides you like and deal with not having any meat. You can have your steak when you get home! Smile

liveforsummer · 27/08/2023 07:34

I repeat - take pre cooked chicken. Takes the worry away about it undercooked m. It gets worse though, fillet steak and refusal to help cook 😆. They won't even be big enough to cut into smaller portions as I previously suggested