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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To take steak for myself to bbq ?

297 replies

Melmi256 · 26/08/2023 19:43

Invited to a bbq … I’m not really a burger hot dog kinda person at all.
Everyone is bringing something, I only really would eat steak from a bbq , can I bring a steak for myself like a veggie would take a veggie burger ? I can’t afford to take steaks for everyone but will bring something else like sides potsto/pasta ?

OP posts:
Bluejaybean · 26/08/2023 20:09

I think you'd have to take a few steaks, claim one for yourself and offer the others around.

I'm a veggie and take a pack of sausages and tell the hosts to just do them in the oven, rather than trying to give me a separate area on the bbq. It's a bit different.

Polis · 26/08/2023 20:09

Who the hell bbq’s a steak? Is this a thing?😂

If you eat meat, yes, it is.

longestlurkerever · 26/08/2023 20:12

You could take a big steak to cut into small pieces and accept you won't get much, and some may miss out - I don't think you have to provide enough for absolutely everyone at the barbecue - but just one portion, no, that's rude.

Missingmyusername · 26/08/2023 20:15

Polis · 26/08/2023 20:09

Who the hell bbq’s a steak? Is this a thing?😂

If you eat meat, yes, it is.

DH does and over his dead body would he bbq a fillet steak!

Watchkeys · 26/08/2023 20:16

Who the hell bbq’s a steak? Is this a thing

Yes.

CherryMaDeara · 26/08/2023 20:16

Of course it’s fine.

RoseRows · 26/08/2023 20:18

Incredibly rude

Missingmyusername · 26/08/2023 20:19

Watchkeys · 26/08/2023 20:16

Who the hell bbq’s a steak? Is this a thing

Yes.

Hang on- I thought you were eating beforehand😂 now you want to take a steak?

nodogz · 26/08/2023 20:19

I would be 100% ok with this as a host. And I would do it myself.

However if I didn't know people hosting well I'd bring something I liked that could be put on the bbq like marinated sausages, kebabs or satay chicken for everyone.

I'd also bring multiple steaks to feed a good few people, sauces like garlic butter or blue cheese butter and offer to help with the cooking.

In summer we often fire up the bbq and invite people to bring their own steaks and we'll do the sides. Bbq steak is an absolute joy but it's an expensive option!

Northernsouloldies · 26/08/2023 20:20

Definitely straying into cf territory, everyone else eating what host is offering and you pitch up with a steak wanting it cooking to your liking, don't do it op you will be marked forever as a Cf. 😁

Catusrusty · 26/08/2023 20:22

Of course it's totally socially acceptable to ignore the food the host has provided and bring yourself something you consider better, but to also just bring a cheap filler of something potato based for everyone else.

You definitely won't look at all socially inept or tight.

TastesLikeStrawberriesOnASummerEvening · 26/08/2023 20:22

You absolutely can't do that unless you want to look like a dick.
Bring something for everyone.

ActDottie · 26/08/2023 20:24

I think it would be rude to take something fancy just for you. Just have a burger.

Hyppogriff · 26/08/2023 20:25

You can’t just bring one for yourself no

Dox9 · 26/08/2023 20:26

Buy the steak, eat it at home, go to bbq, nibble on sidedishes. Job done, no awkwardness.

xyz111 · 26/08/2023 20:27

How do you know the host might not do something like this? If someone came to my bbq and just bought steak for themselves, you wouldn't get an invite again

Curiosity101 · 26/08/2023 20:28

Surely you message the hosts and ask them if they're okay with it? I'd not have any issue with someone bringing a steak to a BBQ I was hosting. Tbf I'd not find it remotely rude if they rocked up with steak either, so long as they brought some excellent other bits and pieces for others to share. But based on other people's replies I'm in the minority, so message them and ask.

TokyoSushi · 26/08/2023 20:28

OP! No.

Aquamarine1029 · 26/08/2023 20:29

If you're happy to look like a massive tit, go right ahead.

Cucucucu · 26/08/2023 20:30

No , it’s rude , take steak for everyone or don’t take it

FoodFann · 26/08/2023 20:31

I hate hot dogs and slurry too. But no, you can’t take your own single portion of steak, sadly. Make yourself your steak at home and eat it before you go.

Then maybe turn up with some veggie skewers or something that you like, and can afford to share.

MaidOfSteel · 26/08/2023 20:32

I wouldn't have a problem with that if I was hosting. I'd rather you got something that you'd enjoy. I don't eat beef or pork, so I am mindful that there are many different preferences/allergies/dietary requirements, and I'd never want any guest of mine to be made to feel uncomfortable around food. Its happened to me too many times and it just isn't necessary.

flannelonthesink · 26/08/2023 20:33

I wouldn't unless you're prepared to share. Maybe take some jacket potatoes and ask the host to chuck them on and that people can have some if they want? Have it with the salads that are hopefully on offer! My family are the same we never do hotdogs and burgers. Always steak/chicken skewers/prawns with various salads Grin maybe bring along things like posh crisps and houmous/guacamole with things to dip in and share those too.

ZenNudist · 26/08/2023 20:35

Rude and odd and selfish

Rewis · 26/08/2023 20:41

You really can't bring yourself a steak (unless you're already known as someone who brings their own food). I wouldn't be offended as the host or anything, it's just odd. Eat before you go and have the sides.

And to the person questioning if eople bbq steaks. At least here it's the most common thing to bbq.