Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Only the apps you allow.

Meet the Other Phone.
Only the apps you allow.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To take steak for myself to bbq ?

297 replies

Melmi256 · 26/08/2023 19:43

Invited to a bbq … I’m not really a burger hot dog kinda person at all.
Everyone is bringing something, I only really would eat steak from a bbq , can I bring a steak for myself like a veggie would take a veggie burger ? I can’t afford to take steaks for everyone but will bring something else like sides potsto/pasta ?

OP posts:
Terrysnotmine · 26/08/2023 20:50

Before I give my definitive answer I need a couple of questions answered. Would you be cooking this yourself? And which cut of steak would you take?

Proudgypsy · 26/08/2023 20:55

Oh god that would be absolutely awful and you'd definitely be spoken about negatively.

You do realise that BBQs are not limited to burgers and hot dogs? Theres pork, lamb, chicken, kebabs, chops, bacon, veg, the list goes on.

Polis · 26/08/2023 20:55

DH does and over his dead body would he bbq a fillet steak!

Maybe he needs to up his BBQ game.

ZeldaWillTellYourFortune · 26/08/2023 20:57

Sparklesocks · 26/08/2023 19:50

I think it’s one thing if you brought multiples but just one for yourself is a bit different. It would be like bringing your own food to cook at someone else’s dinner party.

This.

Just go for the social aspect if you don't like the food.

Mummyof287 · 26/08/2023 21:05

Definitely not, would be very rude unless you were going to buy enough for everyone! You aren't a vegetarian which is totally different.Suck it up and eat the other meat, or just don't go.

Reminds me of the time my very annoying BIL and partner (who we no longer see for good reason!) brought a packet of cathedral city cheddar and branded coca cola to ours because our own brand versions weren't to their taste....total snobs despite both coming from disadvantaged working class households.

LadyMacbethWasMisunderstood · 26/08/2023 21:06

It’s not at all like being a vegetarian. I really hope you got a hold on the situation before you went to the barbecue.

Every so often (increasingly) I read stuff on here that genuinely makes me wonder at people and how they get on in the world. This was such. No, of course it’s not ok to take steak to a barbecue just for yourself.

JaceLancs · 26/08/2023 21:13

I have various allergies and am also dieting so took to a recent bbq home made halloumi and veg kebabs , low fat burgers, low fat sausages, pork steaks and some marinaded chicken flatties, gluten free brioche buns
I got to eat 1 burger (no bun) and a pork steak as everyone else dived on it!
I had taken enough food for 4 people some people had just brought a bit of salad

cushioncovers · 26/08/2023 21:22

No it's rude. Can't you eat one burger just once?

louderthan · 26/08/2023 21:25

No. Just no. I second the idea of making chicken/steak/halloumi kebabs

tothelefttotheleft · 26/08/2023 21:28

Bluejaybean · 26/08/2023 20:09

I think you'd have to take a few steaks, claim one for yourself and offer the others around.

I'm a veggie and take a pack of sausages and tell the hosts to just do them in the oven, rather than trying to give me a separate area on the bbq. It's a bit different.

With energy prices it might be better to cook them at home and take them with you.

foolishone · 26/08/2023 21:33

I mean, you can but everyone else will think you're a dick.

If you don't like bbq food like burgers then just have the salads etc. or take something you like that you can offer to others too. Make some chicken or halloumi skewers or something.

CoreopsisEverywhere · 26/08/2023 21:35

Incredibly rude. Have steak at home another day. Slum it with burgers on this occasion or eat veggie food if that’s such an awful prospect.

foolishone · 26/08/2023 21:36

I'm picturing the OP sat eating her special steak, other people spot it and she or the hosts have to explain each time 'sorry that's just for Sarah' you can have a burger.
It's so weird. 😄

justanothermanicmonday1 · 26/08/2023 21:38

Have the steak before you go! Problem solved.

Idratherbepaddleboarding · 26/08/2023 21:50

Yes YWBU but also you can guarantee someone else (probably a man!) would get to it before you did and also if the host is providing paper plates, you might struggle to eat it.

Cheeseandlobster · 26/08/2023 21:53

headcheffer · 26/08/2023 19:49

Jesus wept, no you can't take an expensive cut of meat just for you it's rude. It would be like taking an expensive bottle of drink and not sharing it.

This. It would be very rude and almost like you are saying the provided food isn't good enough

Tessisme · 26/08/2023 21:59

I would just try to find something to eat at the bbq. There's bound to be SOMEthing you can eat. I also like pp's idea of making up skewers. Even a roll with cheese and salad and dressing would surely fill you up? But taking a steak is weird. How would you eat it? With a knife and fork from a china plate? Or would you gnaw into it like Fred Flintstone?

5128gap · 26/08/2023 22:05

A thousand No's OP.
Eat your steak at home before you go and just pick at the pringles and bread sticks at the bbq.

SeanMean · 26/08/2023 22:07

Very weird and rude….don’t do it!

Fluffyrug191 · 26/08/2023 22:14

I'm a bit of a BBQ food snob too, don't like burgers and really picky with sausages. I love all the sides though so would probably offer to take some nice side stuff like rice salads, cous cous etc. I'd love to take my own steak but would probably have the same dilemma as you and I do fear it would be viewed as a bit odd. I think skewers is a really good option and would provide at least 8-10 so it's a contribution, rather than bringing your own portion only.

PoshPineapple · 26/08/2023 22:26

Dreamingofasandybeach · 26/08/2023 19:52

what about if you made some steak and chicken skewers? the ones where you put a bit of steak / chicken, pepper, onion, mushroom and male a few of them and then be like oh I was fancying some so thought I'd make a few? I'd be greatful if someone did that if I was throwing a BBQ - just make sure you get to them first 😋🤣

This.

Canisaysomething · 26/08/2023 22:26

Sharing food is a social ritual that builds trust amongst friends. It's fine to bring food if you bring enough to share with others whatever it is. But don't bring a single piece of food for just yourself. The sharing aspect is important.

Crazycrazylady · 26/08/2023 22:33

No that's bonkers to rock up with one steak🙄

Cowlover89 · 26/08/2023 22:35

Wouldn't bother me and my friends Wouldn't mind 🤷‍♀️

Janieforever · 26/08/2023 22:40

Is this the first time you have been to a bbq? I’m assuming it must be. When everyone brings something it’s multiples, you’re contributing, you don’t just bring something for just you and eat it, it would be very odd.

It’s a social event, a joint meal. I’m sure you must be able to eat other stuff, I simply don’t believe the only thing you can eat is steak, and chicken, seafood, veggie skewers etc, is all stuff you cannot eat. Is that really what you are saying?