to think that men are just fucking noisy and I am not "sensitive" to noise?

[PyongyangKipperbang]

2 (ex) husbands. 2 Sons. 4 Daughters.

Every single man I have shared a house with has been so sodding noisy! Why simply open a door when you can wrench it open and slam it shut?! Why walk when you can stomp?!

My BIL, my father, my partner (we dont live together by choice), all noisy. My DD's, my sister, my mother, me....we just dont galump around like rhino's on acid.

And no, its not weight or size. Some of the women are larger/heavier than some of the men and yet still seem to manage to navigate their way through the world without sounding like they are invading a nation.

Sick to bloody death of youngest DS (17) wrenching his bedroom door off the hinges, stomping into the bathroom, slamming the doors, stomping down the stairs..... Got cross tonight and he said "yeah, dad said you are oversensitive to noise". FFS, I am a metal fan! Loud noise does not bother me, but unneccessary loud noise does! DS's dad is 2 inches shorter than me, and when we were married, weighed less than me but still managed to make more noise than the audience at a Taylor Swift gig...ok exaggerating but you get the point.

I agree OP. Our baby sleeps in our room and I can walk in, get into bed next to her without waking her. DP comes in and talks at normal volume??? Puts lamps on?? Wakes her up every time. So frustrating.

My DH sounds like a huge elephant when he moves around and comes downstairs. He sneezes loudly, he coughs loudly, he laughs loudly, etc. 😂

Oh God yes, the sneezing!! Most people ~women~ can get by with a little pu-choo, DH somehow has to release an enormous KAAAA-TCHYAAOOOWW!!!! I call it his How To Sneeze Like A Complete Twat moment. Makes the kids chuckle.

My 4' 11" mother (or used to be, she's definitely shorter these days) is the loudest stomper on the planet. It's mind boggling how much noise such a small person makes!

There's two men in my office who I swear have an ongoing competition about who can be the loudest on the phone / Teams calls. Unfortunately one of them sits opposite me. Fortunately I can mostly work from home! I actually like going into the office but this puts me off! This isn't a male dominated environment either...it's social services!

DH is the same on calls / Teams. Lockdown was awful when we were all stuck at home. I honestly thought I was going to go mad. AND he's incapable of shutting the bathroom door quietly. Always fun when he has to leave at 6am for a meeting elsewhere.

In a separate house?

I would love that, if that's the case does it work.

They are all such disgusting creatures. Barely more than animals.

My back door does take a beating sometimes though when they forget.

I will not laugh. I'm not laughing 🤭

All words are made up. They aren't roaming about in nature waiting to be tamed.

Yes it works - it's the best choice I ever made. I was worried at first it could damage our relationship, but quite the opposite.

I do know men who are normal. They are capable of conversing at ordinary levels, walking without announcing to the world that they are, entering a room and collecting what they need without a fanfare...but unfortunately I didn't marry one of those.

I blame growing up with my very loud father, it made me think it was normal for men to galump their way through life. It's only with time that I've realised the non-galump men exist.

Obviously there are women who galump, but they seem to be less prolific than the men.

yes yes, NAMALT and yes yes some women are like this too.

But i know from my own experience that people who open doors noisily (who even manages that?) are more likely to be men than women. Outside of it being caught by a draft, door slammers IME have usually been men. Loud sneezers: men (having said that, I'm normally a quiet sneezer, but if one gets me by surprise it can be really loud and almost performative).

Wow. You really gulped down the "female dating strategy" kool aid didn't you.

You are equally as vile as incels.

I have 3 sons and a daughter. Apart from my youngest son ( who is deaf so cannot hear just how loud he is being) my dd is far far noisier!

@Longagonow96 please could you point me in the direction of the non made-up words? 👀

It’s definitely not exclusively a man thing. My mum is terrible for stomping, slamming and crashing about. She also breaks things quite regularly, because if she can’t get them to do what she wants, she uses brute force with predictable results. Basically a combination of lack of patience and a fair amount of passive aggressive not caring if her frantic busyness disturbs other people.

Exactly!

My H isn’t like this, nor is my father or brothers, thankfully, but I know plenty of men who are. Especially at work. Some men have that need to announce themselves and alert everyone to their important presence totally baked-in.

I blame them being entirely centred as kids and society for still giving boys and men the sense that they are better, more important and must come first. So to speak.

DH and DS are like this but they're dyspraxic so they don't know how much pressure they're putting into doing things like shutting car doors. DH also over tightens everything so we had to replace all our taps with ones he couldn't over tighten, he also trips over and walks into everything.

I've never noticed a man wearing way to much perfume though, that's always, always women IME.

The noise is bad, really bad. But the breaking of things can be so stressful it's almost traumatic. Because they just won't be told. And if you do give as much as a squeak of "could you just be more careful with..." then all hell of arguing and huffing (and noise!) breaks loose.

My ex broke a 130 year old marble fireplace to pieces. For 130 years it just stood there, through two World wars and bombings, until the bungling, cack-armed humanoid of a modern man arrived. I cried. Just cried.
And then I had it rebuilt by a second-hand stone countertop company and gravestone makers.
His "solution" was to board it up or have a mantlepiece made out of oak sleeper 😐😩

When my parents were alive I tended to phone them on a Sunday after lunch. Usually my dear Dad was doing the washing up in the background , in a different room it has to be said, and it sounded like they were in one of those Greek restaurants where they smash plates. My mum could never have nice glasses as they just ‘came apart in his hand’.

Maybe I'm lucky? The men in my life (DH, two DSs, my dad, FIL) are not like this.

i do also think it's ok to acknowledge that some people are no good with delicate things and therefore a household should either not have them, or have some people designated to care for them. Partners in a relationship should play to their strengths (he washes, i iron. He cooks i clean the bathroom. He shops, i file taxes. He dusts. I do the garden....)

Yes - some men are uncivilised brutes - not my husband, but I really notice others as OP describes.

I have a real prejudice against men who manspread when sitting down (why??? it's vulgar and highly unattractive) and also the ones who have that walk...can't describe it very well, but sort of swaggering and kicking their legs/feet out widely as they go. It's what I think of as a 'yob' or 'uncouth' walk - you just know they'll be crude, rude and full of themselves.

I remember when I was teaching there was a certain type of boy who would have to be kicking something all the time, or he wasn't awake. Every door had to slam, every drawer had to be rammed back in. God - they tried my patience. It must be learned behaviour - that's what real men do, or something.

I worked with some outdoorsy men who needed to use radios. The boss was always sending memos asking for the radios to be placed back carefully after use instead of thrown forcefully at the table, which regularly broke them and cost money. But no - I think their idea of masculinity just wouldn't allow them to carefully place anything. It's definitely a cultural thing.

During lockdown, my DP worked upstairs in the spare room and I worked downstairs. The noise he made just typing was quite incredible, every keystroke sounded like someone stamping on the floor above. When he went up or down the stairs, it sounded like a whole regiment.

I'd give anythng to hear those sounds again though. He died nearly 3 years ago.

🙁