Is DS's new GF a CF or AIBU?

[Toolittl]

Adult DS 25 still lives at home. DH and I go away every weekend in our caravan and so his newish GF 26 and also still lives at home (who I have yet to meet in person) comes and stays with him which I'm absolutely fine with she lives 3hr drive away. The last 2 weeks we've come home and she's left used panty liners both in the bathroom bin and in DS's wastepaper bin in bedroom.
I don't know how to broach it with him. He will take it that I don't like her without meeting her etc. It's not like she's a young kid at 26, personally I would either empty both bins before I left or pop them in my wash bag to take home with me. I left the caddy bags out as a hint this weekend. I would be mortified to think someone else would see something so intimate and for context they're not wrapped back up in their packet either.
Opinions?

The bin is there to be used, that being said l wouldn’t leave sanitary products just thrown willy nilly unwrapped, unrolled and used side up! Even in my own home but especially in others I roll and wrap them up. In someone else’s house I’d be even more discreet.

I'm with OP this is disgusting. Put them on a nappy bag and then in the bin. Nobody should have to be dealing with someone else's unwrapped sanitary products, that's vile

You are not being even slightly unreasonable.

Tell DS to empty bathroom bin after she’s been.

I would just be polite enough to empty at least the bathroom bin myself before I left.

She is your son's guest, that is his job.
Also if the bin is closed with a liner then I totally don't get the issue.

Yeah, that's grotty if they're not wrapped. I personally would ask him to make sure she's a little more discreet. I've had to pick used towels from my DSD's bin when she wasn't wrapping them. I bought her some pop in bags and gently asked her to use them.

Time to stop doing anything for your lad as he’s 25 that includes his washing too

I think she comfortable doing this and thinks it’s normal so do light and breezy

This. Easy.

I do think that the grimmest thing on this thread is you emptying a grown man’s bin. Come on op.

From my POV, this isn’t cheeky in the least, but as is evident from this thread, some people are grossed out and some are bemused, looks like everyone does it differently. It wouldn’t occur to me to take them home in someone else’s house, but I’d wrap em up and bury them in case someone was bothered. TBH I’d be more bothered if she was flushing them/tampons or whatever else. Just say ‘hey, son, could you empty the bins?’ whenever you see them, if you don’t like them there. I wouldn’t raise it directly, it feels a bit unwelcoming (to me).

Just tell your ds to empty the bins before you come back, he should be doing this anyway.

She probably does not realise that your precious DS is incapable of emptying a bin and that his mummy has to do it.

Instead of shaming her for her natural body functions, maybe get your grown up son to do some housework and empty the bins and do his own washing

A lot of panty liners have just a thin strip to cover the sticky bit, and is useless to wrap the next one up in. And even if you roll them up to keep the ‘sunny side’ in they ping back out again. So she may well have tried. Keep some nappy bags by the bin if it bothers you so much

This. What an utterly ridiculous thing to post. It's a bloody bin!! I sincerely hope you will not be having a word because the issue is entirely yours

You want her to take her sanitary towels out of the lidded and lined bin so you don't have to look at them?

Do you hear yourself? It's a BIN. It's not normal to ask people to censor their rubbish. It's also not good for the environment to be wrapping rubbish up in more and more unnecessary plastic so it'll never biodegrade.

First year at uni on campus, I was putting my used sanitary towels and pantliners in my bedroom bin. Sometimes rolled up, sometimes not. Never wrapped. It's what I'd always done at home.

I was mortified when the corridor cleaner, who came in our rooms daily to empty the bin and clean the sink, politely asked me to wrap them up in paper or put in a bag, as they were sticking to the bin liner.

That day I changed my behaviour for life, as I actually thought what she was seeing.

Maybe the GF hasn't had her lightbulb moment like I had.

Half of each. She is putting in the bin as she does in her house, where she empty the bins. I found gross not to wrap them in the new sanitary liner but not everyone does it.
In the same page she is not in her house so you need to tell your SON to clean after and don't leave unwrapped sanitary products in bins. I'm sure he will pass glady that duty to her.

It is your son issue, he is the host. Just tell him it is an adult not a kid.

I’m probably like you and from a generation that felt periods were to be kept hidden, and you must never let your partner see evidence of used period products.

I have folded, and rolled them in toilet paper and have even taken them home with me!

However when my DD started her periods she was less reticent about them. She would even tell her dad she was on her period if she had cramps! She just put them in the bathroom bin in the bin liner, and I would see them when I emptied the bin.

And I thought ‘Good on her!’ She was growing up in a world where periods were not something shameful to be hidden.

I get seeing a strangers used pad might be distasteful (think of the people who have to clean public bathrooms), somehow seeing my DDs wasn’t a problem.

I don’t think she’s a CF, but if you don’t like seeing them (and you don’t have to), just ask your son to sort the bins. There is far more openness between boyfriends and girlfriends, I assure you he will not be bothered.

I think that's the problem, it's too intimate picking up a grown man's dirty clothes/undies and looking in his bathroom bin. You're going to see plenty you'd rather not. Best he deals with it all.

😂

YABVU

She's disposing of them properly in the thing designed for disposing of them.

All this putting them in additional bags / wrapping them up in more paper is just creating additional waste for no good reason.

A used panty liner in a lined and lidded bin isn't a health hazard (although tbh panty liners themselves are a bit unnecessary).

If it is bothering you, just tell your DS to empty the bins when she stays.

Jeez yes it’s a bin but who wants to see someone else’s used pantyliner. I wrap mine in my own house. I doubt my husband would like to see.

I’d love to know where little precious is putting his used condoms.

He’s the host and she’s a guest so it’s his job to empty the bins if you’re offended by seeing rubbish in a bin, tell him to do it before you get back each weekend - that way you’re not blaming her and family relationships will remain calm. If I had a guest start unilaterally emptying random bins in my house I’d be totally bemused.

I agree with @catsoop , she’s an adult. An adult would leave your house as they found it, which includes emptying the bins where she’s placed her used liners.