Is DS's new GF a CF or AIBU?

[Toolittl]

Adult DS 25 still lives at home. DH and I go away every weekend in our caravan and so his newish GF 26 and also still lives at home (who I have yet to meet in person) comes and stays with him which I'm absolutely fine with she lives 3hr drive away. The last 2 weeks we've come home and she's left used panty liners both in the bathroom bin and in DS's wastepaper bin in bedroom.
I don't know how to broach it with him. He will take it that I don't like her without meeting her etc. It's not like she's a young kid at 26, personally I would either empty both bins before I left or pop them in my wash bag to take home with me. I left the caddy bags out as a hint this weekend. I would be mortified to think someone else would see something so intimate and for context they're not wrapped back up in their packet either.
Opinions?

A used panty liner really isn’t for everyone else on the house to see in the bathroom bin. Even wrapping it up in tissue is better than just leaving it for everyone to see.

Next weekend, come home a couple hours early so she's still there. Take the bins out in front of her, while ringing a handbell and calling out UNCLEAN! UNCLEAN!

Bloody women, unwilling to hide the evidence that they have a vagina. Cheeky isn't strong enough for that level of brazen hussy.

I wouldn't wrap mine in toilet paper before binning them, what a waste. DH has managed not to faint at the occassional glimpse in the bin.

It's a bin! They're not meant to be lovely, my kitchen bin currently has bones and (MN) chicken trimmings in it. When it needs changing I'll tie it up and take it out. I wouldn't be looking through what's in it. She put rubbish in a bin with a bag and a lid. Nappy bags are just another layer of plastic to go into landfill. Could she wrap them in a piece of tissue, yes, but it's not necessary.

Sorry, but this one made me

It’s a bin, what else would she do with them? Has it got a bin liner in?

I think you will definetly end up looking the unreasonable one here.

I nearly choked on my tea reading this. Good point.

Surely the bathroom bin is there for things like this? And the liner is so you don't have to handle yucky pads or come into direct contact with period blood....(yes, she will have periods too). Personally I would find leaving pads in the open bedroom bin (I visualise this as more of a WPB which of COURSE your son should be emptying) yuk, but FFS nothing is wrong with leaving a pad in the bathroom bin. In a liner bag. Are you really so delicate you can't stand the sight/smell of another woman's pads? Just pick the liner up by the edge, close it and bin it, with your regular weekly/however often emptying.

Hang on so you want him to ask his gf to take her used sanitary liner home??
Please don't ask her to do that.. You'll have no chance of her wanting to ever meet you.
My sons a similar age to your son and his gf is probably at my house half the week along with my SD she puts all tampax cardboard in the bathroom bin.. It's fine and that's what a bathroom bin is for unless I'm missing something?

Don't you think if you ask him to empty the bins before you return home - that he might mention it to her and your potential future relationship with her would be off to a bad start?

It's a bin, they're used to put rubbish in. She's put rubbish in them.

I would never think twice about putting a panty liner in a bathroom bin... anywhere. If that is at partners house or a friends or whatever! I'd never pop it into my bag to take home with me. That's odd?

initially I thought YABU but then I saw that she isn’t wrapping them up either in the wrapper or a little bit of toilet paper? I thought everyone wrapped them up before popping them in the bin? Now I’m intrigued! I would say that it’s probably fine to pop them in the bin unwrapped in your own home, but I think she should be wrapping them up before disposing of them in your house.

She's literally disposed of them herself as they're in the bin.

Guests don't put the household rubbish out and you'd wonder exactly what they were hiding or being paranoid about if they did.

If these were cotton pads/wool/buds would you think the bathroom bin was no place for them??

But I'd always wrap it up I must say.. either in the package of the next or in toilet roll.

Fair point

So best he keeps his mouth shut isn't it?

This. She’s not wrapping them first so that’ll contaminate the bin and leave deposit that will smell. The pads smell after only a day or 2 anyway.
I’d only leave in a bin if visiting and

1. I’d wrapped in sanitary product bag or in it’s revealed wrapper
2. the bin has a lid and says it’s for sanitary items

for what it’s worth I have a bag on back of my guest/cloakroom bathroom door with spare tie,s, some disposable bags and a little note to ask visitors to place items in bag then in the lidded bin (eg don’t flush). I don’t mimdcemptyingvth3 bin after guests, but if I found unwrapped items in there I’d certainly be telling my ds ‘s to have a bloody (ha) word with their partner to wrap items first

I know wrapping creates more landfill- but it is unhygienic even if in bin . I don’t know what is ever acceptable about having to wash some one else’s blood or urine from a waste bin , or even sluice out a wheelie bin where adults are just chucking contamined waste or food item loose - your bins must be full of maggots in summer 🤢🤯

luckily all the partners my ds have had, and all women visiting my home over last 40 years have NEVER been this inconsiderate

OP, tell your son to empty and clean bins after the visit. Be explicit and clear why- say it’s unhygienic and gross to have to dispose of someone else’s bodily fluids by hand, you stopped that when he was potty trained and you’re not doing it again. Stop emptying his bin an all- in fact make it his job to empty bins and clean them each week. Then it’s on him to get his girlfriend to be more considerate. She is clearly used to mummy at home disposing of them, and doesn’t think about it - she needs a wake up call that there are no magic elves or fairies emptying bins,

I'd feel exactly the same OP, I have no problem with people using the bin it's the not wrapping that I find a bit yuck. I'm not prudish etc. but even in my own home I'd wrap in some tissue or the original packaging before popping in the bin.

Yeah, but wrap them at least I would have thought. Personally I would have emptied them into the main bit, or taken them away with me.

Provide nappy sacks if its that offensive to you.

I think it’s fine you have your own issues and quirks. Tell your son you do and ask him to empty the bins as you have issues with it. For me I’d not be bothered , and the thought of having to take them home gives me the boak, but we are all different people.

just ask your adult son to empty the bins at rhe end of the weekend as you struggle with body fluids.

@Fidelius "Whoever fishes them out, OP or OP's son, it's as CF as you can get."

Why would anyone be FISHING them out? Just take the whole bad out, tie up and throw the lot away. You wouldn't open the lid, root through the kitchen bin, and be offended by used tissues, so why the bathroom bin?

Agree

I would never expect guests to have to empty the bins and take rubbish home with them.

Tell DS to clean up after the weekend.

You aren't the maid.

I seriously would be Extremely unhappy about this 😡. Ask your son to empty the bin before you get back . You are not their maid.