has anyone managed to pay for private school on a lowish salary? I am so worried about ds going to state school

[unhw]

Me and ex are divorced. DS is 3.5. Ex pays me 700 a month, he never sees DS so obviously that amount would change if he did start to see him.

I have been to some schools near here to look at them because if ds does go to a private school then I would want him to go to the nursery part too, from the word go. At the moment he goes to a nursery near the house which is average at best, despite an outstanding ofstead rating.

The schools are awful. There are so many kids. Barely any smartly dressed. Seems to be no order and organisation. Pick up is 3:20 (?!) so god knows what would happen to my job.

I really really want him to go to private school and the one I’ve seen is around 18k a year for primary. Has anyone done this on a low salary and if so how? Did you move house or downsize etc. I don’t want to do anything extreme but my priority is this and I would do what it takes it there’s a way.

How did they get friends to pay for their school fees?!!

Agree with this, just sending your child to a specific school may not be enough. Children need to build self esteem and form social relationships during their school experience. There was one girl at our private school whose parents also scrimped and saved to send her there. She was never bullied but had zero friends for the entire 10+ years she was there. It must have been a miserable experience. Later on, she developed what was most likely an ED and nobody ever saw her during lunch breaks which isolated her further. She finished school with very good marks but not sure that was worth it.

The above post is such nonsense. If you’re earning £65-£75k per year then of course you can afford private school - your take-home pay would be about £5k a month!

Firstly it’s irked me a bit about the 3:20pm comment - sounds a bit entitled- ‘oh daaarling how could I possibly manage? What do you think every other working parent has to do?
Secondly, did you not think about primary schools in your area before either moving to your current area or having DS? I mean, when I was planning on pregnancy, moving to an area with at least one good school nearby (and fully reading up on how to be 100% sure of getting in) was top of my priority list. There are so many fantastic state primary schools but you do have to look for them and be a bit clever about where you live

Depends what you mean by ‘low salary’ tbh. For most people 18k is a ‘low salary’ so paying that in school fees is not possible. If you mean ‘can I do it on 70k which is a not astronomic but puts me in top 10% of earners salary’ then it’s a different conversation .

(To clarify, when I said “the above post” I meant the one by @Merryoldgoat on the previous page).

There are plenty of posters who will delight in telling you that it’s not feasible OP, most likely down to their own issues. But on your salary (assuming your mortgage or rent isn’t insanely high and we’re only talking about one child) then IMO it absolutely is.

I have three children so private was sadly never a real option but I found tiny tiny village schools with small classes and mixed age classes. Their primary school had less than 70 pupils and the year 1swere on friendly terms with the year 6s.

The above post is such nonsense. If you’re earning £65-£75k per year then of course you can afford private school - your take-home pay would be about £5k a month!

Yeah it’s not. I earn more than the top end of that and take home £4,300. Where are you getting your estimates from?

I can in no way afford private school.

I teach these 'scruffy' children that you are discussing with such disdain.
They get a very rounded education, thanks.
In fact, many of them are more intelligent, culturally sensitive and emotionally adept than your posts suggest you are.
I find your attitude to be tone deaf and your snobbery utterly repugnant.

I agree that it’s most definitely possible to send a child to private school on the OP’s salary. She’s earning around 5k a month (after tax let’s not forget) which is huge!

Could you buy a nice blazer for DC to wear at the weekend and see if that scratches your itch, before you decide to enter into a hefty long term financial commitment? You never know, DC might hate it?

Failing that, you could search uniform suppliers to identify state primaries with blazers in their dress code?

For the uninitiated, move into outstanding catchment areas.

Then discover their little prodigies aren't academic and is was an utter waste of mo.money.

No, it’s about £3.7 to £4k allowing a very modest 5% pension contribution.

After fees of £1500 a month (at present - they go up a good 5% most years - this years many seeing >10%) leaving you with £2.2k to £2.5k

Once bills, mortgage, uniform, clothes, travel costs start coming off it’s not so ‘easy’ especially after Y1.

£65k - £18k - taxes = still more than a lot of people live on.

I think it's do-able in terms of funding, in theory st least. You'd need to do the sums for your own budget and see if it's realistic for you, @unhw .

What are the local schools actually like, though? Have you looked at the inspection reports, checked their websites for what they provide, etc? What about the secondary schools they feed into - are they good? Before committing tens of thousands of pounds, it's probably wise to make absolutely sure you believe it's necessary.

I can empathise with feeling worried about education standards and other potential issues at schools. Some of the schools near me and near our friends aren't very good (based on inspection reports, word of mouth, exam results for the secondaries) and I would worry about my DC if they had to go there. I don't think it's unreasonable to consider the feasibility of other options in those circumstances.

You think someone earning 70k takes home 5k a month!? Try 3k after tax pension and travel to the job have been taken out!!!

The kids are roaming around because most early years settings have “free flow”. That’s very deliberate. The kids are learning through play. There will be more formal learning going on sometimes, but “free flow” is current good practice.

I am a singe parent with one child in private school (Y9) I earn 3x what you do and it is still a significant chunk of my take home pay.

You should add another 25% minimum to the fees for uniform, trips, lunches, activity weeks etc. They all add up and in addition, my sons fees have doubled since he started in reception class. Honestly, you can't afford it.

@anonymousamy

Your maths is what’s nonsense, not my post.

Depends what your priorities are. If your take home is 4.3k then of course you could afford private school. Say that school fees are 1.5k a month. Rent 1.2k. That leaves you another 1.6k a month to pay for everything else, which is very doable! And that’s assuming you’re a single parent with no partner.

Nope - see my post above. You’d have to take less fancy holidays but it’s perfectly doable. Like I say, it’s a question of priorities.

YABU. You sound like a snob.

@anonymousamy i know you’re coming at this from a point of trying to help but I’m not sure you have much grasp of the situations involved

£4300.

And that’s assuming no pension contributions - unlikely.

Private schools cost approx £6000 per term. For 3 terms. £18000 a year.

A single parent is not affording that, plus mortgage, bills, wrap around care, commuting, day to day life etc.

People aren’t sending their kids to private school on that salary.

I assume you’re referring to the OP, but if wanting the best for DC makes me a snob then I’ll happily be called that name!

You’re pulling figures out of your backside.

If she lived where I do in a very unfashionable part of SW London and rented a very boring semi her rent would be £2000 minimum. Travel to town would be £180 a month and council tax £190 - pretty much £2.5k gone before any food, clothes or bills.