Page 10 | Fed up of my greedy husband

Yoloohno · 2023-08-13T22:18:50+00:00

Once again I’ve returned home to find hex eaten something that was bought for myself or by another member of the family as a treat and left me the communal food for me to eat. Think greggs filled doughnut V Tesco jam doughnut. As a one off fair enough but it’s time and time again. He will eat what he wants regardless of who has bought it. Gifted chocolates from clients that I’ll save, kids Easter eggs it’s fair game. Yet his treats never make it to the communal cupboard, they either get eaten straight away or get hidden in his car. Once again it’s sorry. It’s Sunday night and I can’t even replace what’s been eaten. Am I being unfair.

OhamIreally · 14/08/2023 12:57

I also think this is about him positioning himself as top dog.

BFwoes · 14/08/2023 13:03

AutumnCrow · 14/08/2023 12:56

Maybe she's lost sight of what a healthy portion of smuggery is supposed to look like.

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🤣

Handyweatherstation · 14/08/2023 13:04

Abbyant · 14/08/2023 12:54

My partner was and still is to some extent really bad for doing this, when I was pregnant with ds he ate all of the things I was craving and I had a massive kick off about it and threatened to kick him out, the next day he went out and bought a safe for me to put my treats in so he couldn’t access them anymore.

I had similar happen, though I wasn't pregnant. There's a particular chocolate I like (this one), but only very occasionally and when we'd get some I often didn't feel like any for a while but, when I did, it had always been eaten. One day I mentioned to OH about the food threads where women have to hide treats and the next time he did the shopping he handed me two bars of this chocolate. He had a sheepish grin on his face when he gave them to me and said 'These are for you to hide'. That was a few years ago and every so often he'll ask me if I need a top up. No idea if he knows where my stash is 😅

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Bossmum94 · 14/08/2023 13:05

time for some well placed chilli/mustard filled doughnuts. All is fair in love and war.

BFwoes · 14/08/2023 13:06

Pineapples198 · 14/08/2023 12:56

My husband does this all the time and it drives me mad. I will ask him what he wants from the shop, sometimes even ask specifically if he wants crisps or chocolate and he always say no. “I’m not a chocolate person” or “nah I can do without it”. (He’s overweight).

I’ll bring a box of chocs home from work (a gift) and find half of them gone the next morning and the box left open. The children will buy sweets with their pocket money and put half away and when they go back for them they are gone. He will eat through a 12 pack of crisps that my son asked for so when he asks for a packet he has to have something else rather than his favourite crisps.

He always says “but it’s only a few sweets…”
Or “I’ll get some more next time I go” that's not the issue. He’s left the kids with nothing when they are expecting their sweets to be there.

next time I go to the shop I’ll even offer do you want sweets? always says No.

very very annoying!!

I genuinely don’t understand these comments.

He always says “but it’s only a few sweets…”
Or “I’ll get some more next time I go” that's not the issue. He’s left the kids with nothing when they are expecting their sweets to be there.

Do you tell him this? What’s his response? More minimising? I don’t get telling an adult not to eat your/your kids’ treats and them just…refusing.

WibblyWobblyTimeyWimeyStuff · 14/08/2023 13:10

Pineapples198 · 14/08/2023 12:56

My husband does this all the time and it drives me mad. I will ask him what he wants from the shop, sometimes even ask specifically if he wants crisps or chocolate and he always say no. “I’m not a chocolate person” or “nah I can do without it”. (He’s overweight).

I’ll bring a box of chocs home from work (a gift) and find half of them gone the next morning and the box left open. The children will buy sweets with their pocket money and put half away and when they go back for them they are gone. He will eat through a 12 pack of crisps that my son asked for so when he asks for a packet he has to have something else rather than his favourite crisps.

He always says “but it’s only a few sweets…”
Or “I’ll get some more next time I go” that's not the issue. He’s left the kids with nothing when they are expecting their sweets to be there.

next time I go to the shop I’ll even offer do you want sweets? always says No.

very very annoying!!

My DH has these tendencies too. Doesn't want something - and then eats mine. 'Bag of maltersers DH?' 'Nah I'm on a diet... ' Then as I'm eating mine, I can see him raising his head and looking towards me as I am enjoying my maltersers with a coffee. 'Are they nice?' he asks. I sigh.... 'yes they are. I suppose you want one do you? Even though you said you DO NOT WANT ANY!' 'aww only if you don't mind..' he says. Then he takes about 5!

I have recently started ignoring him, and when he says 'nice are they?' I say 'yep!' and carry on munching away leaving him without. He CHOSE to not have any and had the same chance as me to have something, so I am not being manipulated into giving him mine.

Also, he eats anything and dislikes very little. So, for example I LOATHE salted caramel. I think it's actually foul. So he gets salted caramel hot chocolate to drink, and salted caramel cookies, and I get ordinary milk chocolate to drink, and white chocolate cookies. He like them ALL but I only like MINE!

So when he decides to munch on mine when I have one or two of mine, I am left with much less than him as I can't eat his. Pisses me right off. I have started hiding my stuff now, so he can only take his own when he nips into the kitchen for a 'snack.'

JeanetteLT · 14/08/2023 13:14

Thing that's missing from your post is any mention of discussion. Have you actually spoken to him about this maybe he doesn't actually realise how much it bothers you.
If you have and nothing works then do as others have said and give him something to put him off, sugar free gummy bears are good

Zimunya · 14/08/2023 13:21

TheShellBeach · 13/08/2023 23:31

OP if it's in the house it's fair game IMO.
Anyone can eat anything in my house.

Us too. If it's a known gift (Easter egg, special box of chocolates, etc) we will ask the owner. Otherwise, if it's in the kitchen cupboards, anyone can eat it. We will always offer if going to get a snack - "Anyone want anything from the kitchen?" I'm so surprised by the number of posters who hide food. I got a bottle of wine as a gift from a client recently, and couldn't wait to share it with DH.

bonzaitree · 14/08/2023 13:25

Yoloohno · 14/08/2023 01:02

Every female friend I have has always been a cheater, not been right, can’t socialise for whatever reason he chooses.

I dare to comment the same about his friends and he makes out like I’m a controlling nutcase despite them being so much worse.

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I’m so sorry OP this is horrible behaviour. You poor woman.

please please get out. This isn’t normal or right way to treat your partner.

willWillSmithsmith · 14/08/2023 13:34

I think some things are fair game, yoghurts in the fridge, biscuits, cakes like Swiss roll in the cupboard etc but if I saw a bar of chocolate or an individual cake that I didn’t buy I wouldn’t eat without enquiring whose it was. It’s just manners, even in your own family.

JaneyB321 · 14/08/2023 13:37

Magenta65 · 13/08/2023 23:20

So why are you still facilitating this. If he can hide his treat so can you. Perhaps you need to have a shelf each etc and say this is mine that’s yours, don’t touch. He needs to grow up really and respect boundaries. However food in a Communal cupboard would be fair game in most houses unless stated otherwise

I think OP is saying that he will scoff stuff regardless of where it is stashed. If he's going to eat the kids' Easter eggs, which are so obviously not his, nothing is safe in that house!

Hadjab · 14/08/2023 13:39

Those lazy gits at Metro have picked up the story

FeistyPanther1611 · 14/08/2023 13:39

I have to say I find both sides of this really really odd.

On one hand you’ve got him who selfishly eats all the food with no respect for others

and on the other you’ve got people who are possessive about food and seem to think it isn’t there to be shared and enjoyed by all (although possibly living with a greedy pig might have skewed thinking on this)

In our house if we are buying a treat we buy for everyone. If we get gifted stuff we will ask each other ‘can we have a try?’. Basic respect for each other. No my good and your food. Kids’ treats are treated the same; if I want a bit of theirs I ask them. They can also say no and that is ok too!

I tell you I couldn’t live like some of you lot.

JaneyB321 · 14/08/2023 13:39

That would drive me crazy. It's not just that he has eaten the food that would annoy me, it would be the blatant fact that he doesn't give a stuff for anyone, the selfish sod! I couldn't even share a bed with a man like that, I'd despise every bone in his body!

Pineapples198 · 14/08/2023 13:50

He says sorry. Doesn’t stop him doing it again though.

RHarrison234 · 14/08/2023 13:56

I have 2 boxes one with my husbands name on and one with mind on - we respect each others treats! everything is is fair game. Taking from the kids is uncool....

Hibiscrubbed · 14/08/2023 13:56

IMustDoMoreExercise · 14/08/2023 11:04

I was answering the point in her OP. I did see the other issues, but I don't have the time or knowledge to answer those.

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Are you for real? You don’t have time? Why did you bother?

Hibiscrubbed · 14/08/2023 13:59

Can people please arse themselves to read all of the OP’s posts, and realise the husband is abusive and controlling?

That way they won’t look quite so bloody stupid when they suggest, for the millionth time, that the OP gets a ‘lockable box’ or delights in saying how everything is shared in their household.

Josell12345 · 14/08/2023 14:00

My 16 yr old does it. I got some kulfi ice lollies for me and theres a load of ice lollies in freezer as i have grandchildren descend too. But he rooted them out and ate all 3 in 2 days before i got chance. I rarely get a treat just for me but sure as hell gannet gob gets it first. He also gets his own stuff and pocket money and looks at me like i have 2 heads when i tell him to stop being so greedy so I totally agree.

JaneyB321 · 14/08/2023 14:12

IMustDoMoreExercise · 14/08/2023 10:53

Just get a lockable box and put your treats in there. It is so simple. Do you just like complaining?

This isn't the real issue here at all. OP's DH is a greedy, controlling abusive bastard in every sense of the word. Nothing that a 'locked box' can do for that, she has every right to feel aggrieved.

sqirrelfriends · 14/08/2023 14:13

My ex was a bit like this, I was very strict with my diet (mostly because he was critical) but kept a tub of strawberries and cream Häagen-Dazs in the freezer for when I really craved it. He ate it consistently, the bastard. Then put the tub back.

He was a selfish prick in many ways but this used to really upset me.

JaneyB321 · 14/08/2023 14:13

Hibiscrubbed · 14/08/2023 13:59

Can people please arse themselves to read all of the OP’s posts, and realise the husband is abusive and controlling?

That way they won’t look quite so bloody stupid when they suggest, for the millionth time, that the OP gets a ‘lockable box’ or delights in saying how everything is shared in their household.

Thank you. I was thinking the same thing.

JaneyB321 · 14/08/2023 14:27

BFwoes · 14/08/2023 12:41

So, you’re aware there are other issues, but you have the ‘time and knowledge’ to ask her if she just likes complaining?

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@BFwoes Exactly! She couldn't be arsed to comment on all of the other OP's posts, which demonstrate that the DH is blatantly abusive, just choosing to make OP feel worse with the 'likes complaining' quip!

CherryMaDeara · 14/08/2023 14:31

Honestly, leave the cunt.

BrightGreenMoonBuggy · 14/08/2023 14:45

Get a lockable box and tell him as he’s a selfish CF who had repeatedly shown that he can’t be trusted to exercise some self control, you’ll have to physically stop him taking things. It’s a bit extreme, but it’s also the last time it will happen!