Has lack of manners stopped you giving things away free?

[dottypotter]

Was going to tip some things I did not need anymore but thought the nice thing to do would be to advertise if someone wanted for free. We are also encouraged to reduce waste etc.

Somebody contacted and said they were interested. I Gave them the address etc and discussed time as you do. Seemed keen to come.

No show, no apology. Im sure not the only person to experience this. I could not be so rude though. If I could not make it I would message.

I wont bother again. Why are people so rude?
They just spoil it.
Has it stopped you giving things away free?😪

That and “Can you deliver?” 😩😩

I was giving away some unused garden fence panels. I got a response saying ‘I need these first thing in the morning because my gardener starts work.’

I ignored it because there were no manners and twenty minutes later received ‘Did you get my message?’

erm l, yes I did. But you can sod off.

I give away loads on Facebook. Best is our local Buy Nothing group, but marketplace works too. Stuff gets left on doorstep at agreed time, if they don't show, gets brought back in and reposted.
I give stuff away because I hate waste and need space in my house. Manners and gratitude aren't really relevant. It's not an act of benevolence. I'm also not bothered if they turn around and sell it.
Charities and charity shops are far more fussy and require far more effort on my part.

Yes it has. In my former workplace we had chairs that we needed to get rid of as they were unsuitable for what was needed. We advertised them and a man came to collect. Walked in and wanted also to take desks etc that people were sitting at. He got very aggressive when he was told no.

YY way too annoying.

I will message a small group of friends to see if anyone there wants something for free. Because I know people won't mess around, plus I am actually likely to see them.

Other than that I leave it out as there is a place in our estate where people leave things/pick them up. Or baby items, next to the community centre on a day that there is a baby group there. If nobody attending the group wants it, the workers will take it and find a home for it.

If I have no luck here then I donate to charity shop.

I occasionally sell stuff on marketplace, if it's big/bulky and worth more than a fiver.

I sell outgrown children's clothes on vinted, that is quite good.

I agree that a small charge is more likely to result in genuine buyers. Olio is so much better than facebook as you can review collectors.

I won't engage with this sort of behaviour

Nor I

It's not stopped me giving away stuff for free, and happily many people are lovely, but rudeness is instantly deleted and/or ignored
Even if rude requests start up after they arrive for whatever-it-is I'll simply turn my back and shut the door - they may or may not be bewildered or offended, but that's for them to work out not me

Some really shocking tales of rudeness here! My favourite is the mum who wanted the giver of children's clothes to pay for the taxi to send them to her one town over!

The lack of gratitude and downright bizarre requests is definitely rudeness and entitlement, some seem to be an attempt to retain dignity. Demanding free delivery and critiquing items as a way of saving face showing they aren't a charity case.

Yes happened to me loads. What I do now is dependent on what it is I list it for £5/£10 when the person comes I then say it’s free. Normally very taken aback and grateful. I just tell them when I list for free always get no shows.

It is selfish.
I was abroad once and despite my tour guide's instructions I gave money to some young children. At that point I was mobbed and the kids followed me to my coach and in the end took 20 quid
After that I never give to people on the streets which has saved me a lot of money. I just say sorry several times until they disappear. The UK is full of beggars and chancers now and I don't want to give them money for a full hearted meal

Urgh, yes - had so much stuff to get rid of from my hoarder father’s house when he died - like you, I didn’t want to just tip everything, so advertised loads of items for free - with varying degrees of success, mostly poor.
Now, I take things to charity shops, donate to organisations or to people I know.

I tend to leave outside - usually big toys or scooters etc, always get taken. Clothes etc goes to the Marie Curie shop.

Yes, you get really crappy people who are rude or no shows for free items. Or the ones who clearly really don't need it, or are going to use it for a purpose unintended. But I keep doing it just for the ones that DO need it, that do appreciate it and for whom it's a huge help. And of course, to keep things out of the tip.

I will always feel a bit sad about the baby changing table I gave away though. Beautiful solid wood Mamas and Papas thing, I'd got it through a free ad myself and it had loads of life. A lady came to get it to put her plants on in her greenhouse. :(

I’ve used Freecycle a lot to get rid of things we don’t need that our local charity shop won’t take but are still perfectly good to use. Without exception I’ve found it brilliant - all the recipients have been really pleased and all have said thank you .

I will always feel a bit sad about the baby changing table I gave away though. Beautiful solid wood Mamas and Papas thing, I'd got it through a free ad myself and it had loads of life. A lady came to get it to put her plants on in her greenhouse. :(

I don't see what's wrong with this? A solid wood frame sounds like a nice thing for putting plants on, and it will be seen by more people than it would be if it was just used as a changing table. Personally I never used a changing table anyway.

We put things on our front lawn, post on Facebook saying free for collection, no holding and saying that I will be out for the day. We are home but I just ignore the messages and no one has ever knocked on the door yet.

That's seriously outrageous whose really that rude 😮

This is my view too.
Some people being rude doesn't stop me being me.

And I've had some lovely experiences.

I gave away an old tumble dryer through facebook and the single parent who picked it up was so so grateful. I don't do it for gratitude but it does help to make it feel worthwhile

I wince when I read stuff like this. I know people have a lot going on in their lives but we all do need to make as much effort as possible for the planet and environment. I know stuff that's already made may end up in landfill eventually but if one or two more people get use out of an item, that's one or two less being bought new and helping reducing demand on resources.

I definitely have skipped over people to next in line. I gave away an Xbox 360 last Christmas, the amount of shitty messages I got from people!

We've started doing a combination: put stuff outside and also put it on Freegle and Gumtree saying message if you want to collect it & we'll tell you the address where you can find it. Can't be arsed to do more than that when I'm giving it for free.

I Freecycle loads of stuff and yes, some people are utter arseholes. A lot seem to have the attitude that they’re doing you a favour by taking the item off your hands, rather than you’re doing them a favour by gifting them something for nothing!

In fact, placing no monetary value on things seems to really bring out the cheeky fuckers and choosing beggars, and make some people unbelievably awkward, picky and rude - to the extent that several times I’ve just thought sod this, and sold the item on eBay instead.

I also used to do the ‘first come, first served’ thing to try to be fair to people but I now wait for all the replies and pick the person who seems nicest, politest and least likely to dick me around.

If you’re giving something away for free, put in your advert that you won’t hold the item. Then, reply to all the ‘is this still available?’ questions with ‘yes’. Even if you’re promising the item to ten people. Only one or two will be genuine, and in my experience it will be the most grateful one. The rest just got over excited about a bargain.

I give lots of things away, and have had very grateful people, who even send me pics of the items afterwards (a plant they resurrected and a dog bed with their happy little dog in it!). Don’t be put off from doing something nice, but deffo don’t say the item is sold until it has actually left your property.

I agree with this method.

Bollocks to that. Yes, if I can give something a new lease of life by finding a new home for it then great. But I'm not being messed about from here to Christmas by people who want you to deliver/never respond to messages/can't be bothered to read the description/are generally rude/don't turn up. Life is too damn short.

I've advertised stuff and if it goes quickly, great. Otherwise it's going to the tip (ours does have a recycling bit where you can ask the staff if the things you have can go in there, so that's a final chance I suppose) or the charity shop.