Has lack of manners stopped you giving things away free?

[dottypotter]

Was going to tip some things I did not need anymore but thought the nice thing to do would be to advertise if someone wanted for free. We are also encouraged to reduce waste etc.

Somebody contacted and said they were interested. I Gave them the address etc and discussed time as you do. Seemed keen to come.

No show, no apology. Im sure not the only person to experience this. I could not be so rude though. If I could not make it I would message.

I wont bother again. Why are people so rude?
They just spoil it.
Has it stopped you giving things away free?😪

If I stick something on the drive, it's a blink and you'll miss it affair before it's gone. Saves a hell of a lot of time.

We lived in an apartment block with a similar culture until the twat in the penthouse complained.

Cheeky bitch

I won't engage with this sort of behaviour. I now just chuck things in the bin. Shame, but things are just made so difficult by people's awful behaviour.

Yes exactly this. I've been abused, threatened, had numerous no shows and rude messages when I haven't immediately replied to their messages within 5 minutes. I give to charity or do car boots now. Though even at a car boot people are really rude trying to haggle down from £1 to 10p for a designer top!

One now can't collect due to waiting in for delivery ...

A hospice shop in leafy Cheshire - didn't even look me in the eye when I gave them a huge bag of stuff, just a curt 'put it over there'. Nothing else for them ever.

A foodbank collection point in the same place - similar story.

My local charity shop - warm, friendly, grateful, get all our stuff

@Made4Sunshine

omg this is appalling!

Not generally. To the offender, yes.

Yes, and I stopped giving to Charity shops after the ones local to me started inspecting the items you'd donated and loudly discussing them in the shop doorway!!! I am sorry if you have too many baby clothes and I am sorry that one of the vests was stained, I did not notice, I am sorry. Why couldn't you leave them in the bag and thank me for the 6 complete with instructions boxes of lego. Anyway, I gave it all to a local nursery and they were v pleased.

I won't bother with Facebook marketplace again because of no shows. I had one woman who 'got called into work' on three occasions so couldn't collect an item I was giving away. I didn't bother chasing her after the third excuse and she's never got back in touch. I took them to the local charity shop in the end.

That happened on two other items too, different people, so I just went to the next in line and one of those people was in their car within minutes of me saying yes. It's a pity you can't rate these people so others know whether to bother with them.

It doesn't take a minute to just say sorry to mess you about, I've changed my mind.

I gave someone a young person a gift of £200.00, never had a thank you.

We’ve got a great local Facebook group. The admin is really strict and repeat non collectors are removed from the group. She also won’t let you receive until you’ve given, even if what you’ve given is cardboard boxes, carrier bags, coat hangers etc, people still want them for various things. We’re a village group and you’ve usually got a mutual friend with the other person so that helps too.

Someone once asked for wood as she was building a chicken coop. I said I had an old shed she could have as long as she came and took it down etc. she did. She was really pleased with the wood and I was really pleased to get rid of the shed!

Yep. Was giving away an item, woman messaged I gave her the address then she said her husband would pick up it when he finished work at 10pm, I said no sorry too late but I’m happy to keep it until convenient she said okay I’ll let you know when. The next day some man turns up knocking on my door we have a ring cam, he couldn’t speak English just kept shouting ‘bike now’, tried to explain through the doorbell we weren’t home, he then starts walking around the back of the house, peering over the gate etc for a good ten mins before leaving. The woman then messaged me hours later saying my husband has just been why are you not in!!! She was swiftly blocked!

Use olio that's the best one for manners

Nooooo! So cheeky!

I offered two Stairgate's.

Some guy messaged me and said

"Where do you live? I want them"

I didn't reply because it was so fucking abrupt.

He followed it up with

"hello? I will take them."

nah you fucking won't.

Was going to tip some things I did not need anymore but thought the nice thing to do would be to advertise if someone wanted for free. We are also encouraged to reduce waste etc.

If its something you are essentially going to bin but you decided to make yourself warm and fuzzy by claiming to 'protecting the enviroment' you would give it away instead but now aren't going to because people didn't grovel and praise you enough for giving them your unwanted trash... you might be an egotistical twat thats not that 'nice'.

Yes repeatedly. Whenever I’ve listed anything I get requests for providing free delivery - sometimes upto an hour away - and then abuse when I decline. No I’m not going to make an hour round trip to give you something for free. Especially when you don’t say please.

That's awful! And completely unsuitable for a nasty, snappy dog.

Why didn't she train her mutt? Plus, a wooden cot could be bitten through by a dog very easily, or jumped out of.

She sounds nuts. Most people would buy a dog crate or train.

Yes, definitely.

If I do it now I stick to a strategy the most important part is not giving out my full address until just before they need to leave to collect it. e.g. I tell them I live at NG2 1 and that if they text me x mins before the pick up time I'll give them the full address. That pretty much stops no shows.

Yes. recently gave a load of childrens clothes and toys to a friend of a friend who was stuggling for money. All good stuff and would be the right age for her dc (she has 4 of them and clothes would have fitted the oldest 2).
Not a word of thanks or anything when she picked them up. Just a mutter of 'these will come in handy'. I just thought, would it have killed you to add a thanks to end of that sentance.

The next lot will be going to the charity shop.

I couldn't collect something for free from anyone and not be able to say thankyou. Its sort of automatic. But obviously not with some people.

Those saying people shouldn't have to show gratitude as they're saving a journey- well no, I'm not looking for gushing thanks, tears or an inner feeling of warmth. Just simple politeness and sticking to plans or letting me know if they can't do so, as with any other interaction. It does seem a bit of a no mans land for civility.

I once had a person send me a blow by blow of their journey to my house "I've just finished work, getting in my car", "I'll be 20mins", "10 mins away" and then never show. It was the weirdest thing.

I agree!

YABVU OP. If you are getting rid of something then it’s on you to ensure it is reused if possible, and recycled if not. Not just sent to landfill because people weren’t polite enough to you. If there was a no-show, try again.

On a more positive note, I find Gumtree much better for general manners than freecycle.

I've also had someone take free baby clothes only to find her flogging them on market place a few days later. Technically her choice but it annoyed me because another mum might genuinely have needed them and she just wanted to sell them.