To potientally not be able to attend father in laws funeral

[Ilovepugs2017]

We live a 5 hour drive away from where FIL & MIL live.
The funeral is sometime this month (not sure what exact date yet). DH wants me to go with him for moral support and I want to be there too however I honestly can’t see how we are going to be able to afford for me to go along.
No matter what DH will be going but we are on our arse in terms of money. No savings whatsoever and our disposable income won’t allow us to have a few hundred spare to cover fuel, food, drink, hotel and the funeral flowers he needs to get for his dad. His mum has said she won’t have room spare at her home for the both of us as DH’s brother partner and daughter are staying there.

Have suggested to DH me trying to find out if I can get a loan from somewhere as my sister has offered to have the kids for me to go with him.

Exactly the brother is being an idiot, wanting a big flashy display of flowers.
Anything low cost won't be good or flashy enough, anything massive will outshine him.
Op and DH can't win, so I'd bodyswerve the whole load of nonsense and do charity donation.

Anything from armed forces charities, to support for retired racehorses, cancer charities, kids charities, anything that the Dad would have supported or reflected his interests.