Colleague sent me a dick pic

[Fiascoo]

Last night, totally out of the blue. He said "fancy helping me out with this?" 🤮

I replied with 😱 and he said "is that it?" I just replied saying "I'm busy." And it's been left at that.

I'm mortified. For context he's about 12 years older, married with a young child.

Maybe I've been too nice about it, but he could make things difficult for me at work which is why I replied in the way I did.

Aibu not to have been more harsh? I feel so uncomfortable about it.

@fullbloom87 - me too and the owners of the company too -

Unsolicited dick picks are the digital equivalent of a flasher. If a colleague flashed his dick at you in the street you'd report that surely. So why not the digital one? At least there'd evidence!

The emoji is not relevant.

I'm an HR manager and can assure I would take this very seriously.

He's looking at suspension pending investigation and likely dismissal for gross misconduct.

Ask for a meeting with your manager and HR and take a colleague.

Fun back and forth?

@Fiascoo it’s fine. You did nothing wrong, people on here are just thick as shit. I think a lot of people would reply in shock. I would probably reply asking if they had the wrong person or what the fuck they were thinking. Don’t feel daft.

You haven’t done anything wrong op.

I understand why you replied because he is in a position of authority and you were worried about the implications if you didn’t and trying to de escalate the situation.

Report to HR if anyone asks you why you replied remind them that’s not the issue, the issue is your boss sending you a pic of his sweaty old knob knowing that he’s senior to you and assuming you won’t do anything about it for fear of implications.

Jeez
You are part of the problem

This. Don't have any more interaction with him. I might have thought at first it was an accident sent to the wrong person but this doesn't seem to have been the case.

What’s the victim blaming for? He’s in a senior position in her workplace, married with kids and he randomly sends her a picture of his penis and yet your mind goes to “you must have done something to encourage this?!”
Back to the 1950s you go!!!

Another HR person here.

1. screen shot
2. block
3. speak to HR first thing Monday
4. do not worry about him giving you grief, this is unacceptable and will be taken seriously.

Please put yourself first in this situation. Take care, you've done nothing wrong.

@fullbloom87

how on Earth do you think she'd have a senior colleagues wife's contact details?

You should ring your HR out of hours number today and report this. Do you also have any other route to report at work?

This is gross misconduct and he will be sacked.

Grim as fuck! Report to HR asap. I would be utterly horrified if someone did that 🤬

I suspect he was pissed and did it - hell blame it on a friend stealing his phone and randomly sending it.

But yea absolutely sexual harassment and using his seniority for sexual gain I suspect if you allow/Ed it to go on - personally I'd speak to HR

I would screen shot before he deleted and I would be speaking to HR asap.
Vile.

OP your reply was better than telling him to "Fuck off"

Also you may not have clicked immediately it was a more senior person at work.

Agree.

Definitely HR. And union rep if you have one.

Most things in life don’t exist in a vaccuum. I would 100% report it to HR. I didn’t say it was appropriate, just that given the back and forth they had, it seems there is some context.

Given her response to him, it seems there is more context and HR will look into that as well.

I get sent them on Facebook from random men and always reply, 'Why have you sent me a photo of a child's penis?'

In this instance I would report him to management.

Strangely enough I've yet to be sent a half decent looking one.

They are usually some revolting looking shrivelled acorn or in the case of young men, they resemble an uncooked frankfurter.

Absolutely gross.

As this is a work colleague it needs to be reported as you may feel very uncomfortable at work with him, it could be seen as being menacing.

Because the OP should do the right thing and report to HR.

So poor wife because she is married to a soon to be unemployed bloke who sends dic pics to junior members of staff.

At least if the OP's job is any good they will offer support and sympathy.

What on earth are you on about? It’s perfectly normal in many, many jobs to have co workers numbers.

This is sexual harassment and cyber-flashing, which (as of 2022) is a criminal offence carrying up to 2 years in prison.

Report this pervert to the police and to HR. Don’t worry about him being senior. He will be fired.

Fuck that
Send it to HR and his wife

Lots of colleagues have numbers of their fellow work mates. I've had bosses in the oast say "I'm on annual leave, but such ans such needs to be sorted by X date, send me a text when it comes in and I'll log on" and that's how you end up with managers and staff having each others numbers.