Topless abroad . Yes or no

[HowmuchcanispendatChristmas]

Just after everyone's opinions. I'm on an all inclusive holiday . Nothing flash . European destination. Hot sunny . 3*. Would you feel offended if a female sunbathes topless at the pool? Just for context I have done , but put bikini top on to go in pool and her drinks . It's literally just going topless when laying on sunbed . More context age range is babies up to 70+ . Lots of different shapes and weights of people . Lots of bellies make and female and lots of big boobs on men. Like I say this is just for context . Just interested in people's opinions. I'm with my husband on holiday .

Oh, and stop imagining that a lonely topless sunbather makes everyone squirm. Plenty of us don't care. Speak for yourself.

I’m religious and conservative (don’t even wear sleeveless or past lower than knee length clothes) but I wouldn’t bat an eye lid at you. What’s fine for me is not necessarily fine for other women.

I’ve been in hotel saunas where women were fully naked and didn’t care then either.

It's interesting how Gladyys went from topless sunbathing to topless at a hotel pool to topless at a family pool and now, it seems, a single lone topless sunbather among decent people, every single one of whom is offended and incapable of looking elsewhere.

It's almost as if she keeps changing the situation until she creates one where it isn't the norm and everyone knows it and is offended by it, in order to prove...something.

People are repeatedly comparing apples and oranges on this thread- “if boobs are ok why not go naked” 🤦‍♀️ don’t people realise that genitalia are primary sexual organs and breasts are secondary? Hence you get people in thong bikinis (buttocks are secondary sexual parts) but not crotchless bikinis!

There are many cultures where only primary sexual organs are routinely covered- it shouldn’t be a surprise that there are countries where being topless is acceptable in certain circumstances.

Oh what a faff. Do it if you must, I'd rather take in the local scenery covering up enough so's not to get skin cancer than feel like I have to keep averting my eyes.I mean, I needn't, but if I accidentally do, that's a bit pervy! As for tan lines, are you planning on walking around naked everywhere so so we can see your all over tan?

If you struggle not to stare at boobs in a way that even you consider "pervy", then I think the beachgoers would rather you stayed away too.

The constant references to skin cancer as if it's divine justice for sunbathing topless - but only for women, of course - are as nasty as they are ignorant.

This.
The topless sunbather would annoy me the same way as other hotel guests listening to loud music,bomb diving in the pool or getting drunk and making a fool of themselves. If I am paying for a 4 / 5 star hotel I expect a certain level of behaviour from my fellow guests.
I am from Southern Europe and I am used to seeing topless women on the beach but I have never encountered any at the pool (any pool!).

'People are repeatedly comparing apples and oranges on this thread'

I know! 'Men go topless why can't women' .

Pay for a place that doesn't permit it and you'll be fine.

Go somewhere that does permit it, and your annoyance is on you.

'Pay for a place that doesn't permit it and you'll be fine'

Well unless we want to go to Middle Eastern countries there isn't anywhere that 'doesn't permit it'. Instead we rely on the common sense and consideration of our fellow holiday makers. Some have more than others as demonstrated on this thread.

You go to places that you know permit it, see it, hate it, and think it's everyone else who lacks common sense?

You're a guest in their country. Nobody is obliged to put aside their harmless cultural norms because you don't like it but still want their sun.

That is my point.I pay more for the hotel so I expect a better level of service and better behaviour from my fellow guests.
So far I have never encountered any topless women by the pool.
I guess it could be more of an issue at a 3* all inclusive as MoanaMadness said .

We'll leave aside the crashing, baseless snobbery since that's a cultural norm for Mumsnet and just get to the point: if you don't like it but you're holidaying in places that don't permit it, great. You have solved the problem. I still haven't heard why this isn't a solution for some other people.

If you don't want to see it but go to places that permit it and then get offended, it's not the others who lack consideration and common sense.

And if it's offensive enough to ruin your holiday and corrupt your children, there can be no good reason not to inquire ahead of time.

'You're a guest in their country. Nobody is obliged to put aside their harmless cultural norms because you don't like it but still want their sun.'

Yes Brits abroad are known to respect cultural norms

I was once on holiday in an African country. Couple of women topless by the pool the young male staff couldn't take their eyes of them. It wasnt their 'cultural norm' you see. Anyone with a brain cell should've been able to see how inappropriate it was. Still gotta focus on those tan lines!

Yes Brits abroad are known to respect cultural norms

And you're a fine example.

I was once on holiday in an African country. Couple of women topless by the pool the young male staff couldn't take their eyes of them. It wasnt their 'cultural norm' you see. Anyone with a brain cell should've been able to see how inappropriate it was. Still gotta focus on those tan lines!

So what? If it wasn't permitted, staff should have told them to put their tops on, much as you'll actually be told to take your costume off or leave in some places dedicated to nudity. If it was and men were leering, that's their failing. Once again, women being blamed for what men do.

'And you're a fine example'

This is very true, finally we agree.

Well, if you're happy and proud to expect local cultures to change for you because otherwise they're failing to be considerate, that's up to you.

It isn't smart, though. Why the aversion to finding somewhere else with rules you prefer? Other posters do it.

'Well, if you're happy and proud to expect local cultures to change for you because otherwise they'refailing to be considerate, that's up to you'

No sure what you're struggling to understand here. I expect people to use their common sense and consideration when on holiday. Please don't keep wanging on about permits and cultures because it is irrelevant.

It isn’t irrelevant though is it. If you go to a country where topless sunbathing is allowed and culturally acceptable, people will be doing it. If you don’t like it, take your business elsewhere.

Same as you would with any other issue- I’m a lesbian so I only go to places where that’s acceptable. If you take yourself to somewhere where you don’t like any element of the culture, that’s entirely on you.

Yeah it’s just gorgeous. I’ve gone in two different places - one in a large US city - it was nighttime and we weren’t even supposed to be on the beach. The land of the free is anything but… Surprised we didn’t get arrested.
Second time off a nudist beach in Greece - just gorgeous (warm!) Not even remotely sexual. Just lovely.

I am not enquiring ahead of time if the hotel permits topless sunbathing,loud music, putting the beach towel on the sunbed at sunrise etc...
I pay more to avoid this kind of behaviour .If by chance any of it happens I complain and I take my business somewhere else the next time.

I am not enquiring ahead of time if the hotel permits topless sunbathing,loud music, putting the beach towel on the sunbed at sunrise etc...

More fool you if you encounter it, then.

You visit a country, think its local culture is irrelevant and think they're lacking in common sense and consideration for not changing to your preferences while you're there.

Right oh.

Why not? If it’s really important to you then why wouldn’t you check?!

'You visit a country, think its local culture is irrelevant and think they'relacking in common sense and consideration for not changing to your preferences while you're there.'

As if it's local culture to sunbathe topless. Like pissed up Brits they will tolerate all kind of unwanted behaviour. I've no idea why you think they'll start issuing your made up 'permits'. They need business from tourism, inconsiderate behaviour unfortunately will have to be accepted.

Back to the op, no you don't do it by the pool at a family hotel. Permits or no permits.