To hate going to big weddings ?

[ForestGoblin]

So awkward. So expensive. So "quirky" yet identical. You can't talk to the bride and groom (who are possibly your only actual friends there). The food cost them a bomb but tastes meh. Ditto the booze. Chair covers for £25 a go??? CHAIR covers? So often impossible to get to. Impossible to leave. Just want to go to bed by 10 but that'd be rude. Hate pressure to dance. Hate the inevitable hangover from all the wine I anxiety drunk (going to try to get through one with zero wine apart from the toasting fizz).

But I think other people must love them otherwise why would they keep happening.

Chair covers. The line is drawn before chair covers.

It. Is. Obscene. Covering a chair. For £25. Not forever. For one night.

Sure, I felt the same for my wedding, we didn’t have chair covers because I thought it was very expensive for nothing much at all, but to each their own. I don’t know why you’re letting it bother you so much.

Weddings are great fun in your 30s, when it’s friends getting married and all your other friends are there. Then they’re a bit shit for 20years until all those friends now divorced, start getting married again.
Having said that, any family wedding that I attend with my sisters is always a riot. My family know how to party.
DH’s family weddings might as well be funeral teas.

High five! I would like anxiety to start being reflected more in the expectations placed on people tbh.

Ok "beefcurtains79".

Touché! 😂

So stay at home, if you stay at home often enough people will stop inviting you.
Problem solved!
Sometimes “anxiety” is just the perfect excuse for letting life pass you by, you’re not here forever you know?

I am very glad not to be here forever. Existence is a total hassle. But the options are not binary. You can dislike situations that make you debilitatingly anxious and still have adventures.

What a ridiculous thing to get worked up over! I had chair covers by the way and they looked beautiful. We worked very hard to pay for our wedding and had what WE wanted.
I know people with social anxiety but it doesn’t make them rude or dismissive of what others want/ like. In your position I would be declining the invitations, no one wants someone at their wedding criticising what they chose to spend their money on.

But your post wasn’t about your anxiety stopping you enjoying big weddings it was about big weddings being the problem, and it was pretty sneery. I got married a couple of years ago, 100 people, fairly big I guess. Don’t think we paid for chair covers but we did spend on flowers and wine because we want it to look beautiful and for people to have a nice experience. Someone invited said they couldn’t come because of their anxiety I was totally fine with it. What I wouldn’t have been happy with is them coming and then blaming the wedding (poor food, wine etc) for not enjoying themselves.

@PrincessUnicorns

She's goes to boring cliche weddings isn't that enough effort for people like you!

Try telling that to someone with Autism you absolute twat

@ForestGoblin

A lot of very social people don't know that you can have a life well lived just climbing mountains or rowing a boat in your spare time.
Not all 'getting out there' involves meeting with hundreds of people.

Don't go then.

But yet it's ok for people to sneer at things like going camping.
Why can't you get over the fact not everybody loves weddings and thinks they're boring.

Oh to be clear I do also hate the weddings! It was a criticism of the identikit pomp and inconvenience to attendees.

The food at my wedding was amazing. Although I do agree at many of the large wedding venues the food can be mediocre but it doesn't have to be. And I love dancing. And drinking. And chatting to people. And I love the emotion of a wedding. Weddings are usually good fun ime.

Perhaps socialising on this scale just isn't for you.

Just don’t go then if you hate them.

@PrincessUnicorns you should be a counsellor

I wouldn’t sneer at that either. I’d say it’s not for me. I wouldnt look down on people who camp or say people shouldn’t go on camping holidays. Each to their own but I blame ‘camping’ the experience as to why I wasn’t having fun.

@PrincessUnicorns that is such a shame as your insight would be so beneficial for many people. Who knew that what works for one person will work for everyone!

I don't really know which way to vote, as, to answer your question directly, No, YANBU to dislike - or even hate - something that lots of other people like.
However

For your reasonings, and most of your responses since, YABU.

I've been to many, many weddings over 40+ years, and overwhelmingly, the food has been lovely.
I've never been to a wedding that is impossible to get to (well, obviously......)
I've never been to a wedding where it is impossible to leave. People leave weddings at different times, for all sorts of reasons.
(I do agree about chair covers)
I enjoy a dance. My dh hates it. He has never felt any pressure to dance (except for a slow dance at our own wedding).
Hangovers are not inevitable. You decide how much you are going to drink, spread over how long, what you choose to drink, and how much water you drink alongside it. Indeed, you don't have to have any alcohol at all. That is up to you, not the fault of "a big wedding"
Weddings don't have to be 'expensive'. It is up to you if you choose to stay over, or if you choose to drink lots, or if you choose to buy new clothes etc etc.

All of those ^ are just from the op.

If you don't like them, then don't go.
Siblings apart, there is no obligation to go to anyone's wedding. If you are being this miserable about every part of every wedding you go to, people would probably prefer that you don't go.