Having a baby with not the greatest looking guy.

[Purplependant222]

My sister is my best friend, she is usually the nicest person in the world and I know this comment came out without her thinking. At the weekend I was talking with my sister and I said I was wondering what our baby (i’m pregnant with my first) will look like. She said without hesitation ‘hopefully the baby will look like you as you didn’t pick the best looking family to have a baby with’. Something along those lines with her trying to back peddle that she thinks my DH gets better looking every time she sees him as his personality shines through. There was also a comment on how all of his family are all a bit ‘unfortunate looking’.

It is true, I fell madly in love with DH’s personality and I wanted a future with him as his values/morals aligned with mine. I’m madly in love with him and couldn’t wait to have his babies.

However now I’m feeling like I’ve somewhat failed my future kids that they’re going to have an upward battle with being ‘unfortunate looking’. I’m not sure why I can’t shake it off as I know DH will be a brilliant and devoted father as he is as a husband, and I know that’s more important than my kids being 6ft tall or voted prom queen.

Most people are not amazing looking but have pretty good lives. Your husband sounds lovely and terrific in so many ways. Of all the types of human value a person can have, looks are the least. We pretty much all end up fairly unattractive no matter how we start anyway.

Your sister should keep her opinions to herself!

It doesn't work like that, you can have very plain parents who produce a stunning child and vice versa. Your baby will be beautiful. Your sister needs to keep her trap well and truly shut!!

Neither DH or I were blessed in the good genes department - DH has got a balding head (and looks bloody awful for it bless him), terrible teeth and is very tall/bandy with bowed legs. I am chubby, grey haired and had got a terrible gait due to flat feet.

Our eldest is stunning. Literally stunning. I look at her sometimes and wonder where the hell she came from. And both her younger sisters are really attractive too, very slim, long blonde hair, good teeth. And with really beautiful souls too.

Absolute luck of the draw. Enjoy your baby, and enjoy having a DH that loves you.

Your sister is very unreasonable

Have you ever met a Mum who described her baby as ugly or unfortunate looking? In your eyes, he/she will be absolutely beautiful on the outside, even if they have 3 noses upside down and 4 ears back to front. With a set of loving parents like you both sound geared up to be, I'm sure they will be stunning on the inside too!

This sounds like how my sister and I speak to each other- we’re brutal!

Neither DH or I are oil paintings, but our weird genes came together to make DD who got the best bits of both of us and is (objectively) gorgeous.

Honestly what’s the point worrying about it? Baby will look how they look depending on how their parents genetics mix. You only need to see some celebrities’ adult offspring to see that you can’t take a family resemblance for granted!

So mean of your sister to even think this never mind say it aloud!

Your DH sounds lovely and your relationship seems solid.

FWIW one of my friends isn’t conventionally attractive and her husband is IMHO very unattractive. They have 3 daughters who are all beautiful inside and out.

Beauty/attractiveness is subjective anyway. It's highly likely that there are many people who wouldn't find your sister attractive, for instance, no matter how highly she rates herself.

I myself have often wondered "really?" when people have raved about someone they find impossibly good-looking/beautiful- to me, those people are just 'ok, but not my type'.

Your baby will be beautiful to you and your DH. And if you ensure you bring them up to be kind, thoughtful and confident, they will be beautiful to others, even if their looks don't appeal to your sister.

There are no predictions where genetics are concerned, some of the best looking couples I know have produced unattractive offspring and Sarah Vine and Michael Gove’s daughter is beautiful!

Goodness, what an awful thing to say.
As lots of posters have said, no one knows what your baby will look like.
For all you know, your baby might end up resembling your sister (genetics is fascinating!)

I hope you can forget about her insensitive remark :)

Better hope they don't inherit your sister's personality!

Sounds to me that you chose a beautiful person OP. Better than a gorgeous bag of skin encashing a horrible cunt.

People always underestimate too, as kids grow, that gleam in the eye, the humour and charisma factor. Micky Flanagan, no looker, would I fancy him if out? Possibly. He's quick and funny. Not the greatest example but I always think people under-estimate, that attraction isn't always just in looks, NB: intelligence, sportiness, and charisma that lights up a room. Confidence doesn't need to be tied to looks, confidence is super sexy. NB: confidence not arrogance.

Wow. What a fucking insensitive comment!! I assume she’s also an arsehole in other ways?

Genetics are a complete crap shoot and you have no idea how they will play out in your child. Neither of my parents are drop-dead gorgeous but my dad, in particular, has... strong features. Quite a big nose, big front teeth, big ears. He is a wonderful dad - kind, encouraging, endlessly patient, generous to a fault. I wish more people were like him.

However, I'm quite grateful that the only thing he passed to me genetically is autism 😂

I actually think (from the celebrity world only) that ‘pretty’ mums & ‘ugly’ dads tend to make really lovely looking children! How many gorgeous women have you seen and seen their dad and been like… how? 🤣 so I wouldn’t worry! Genes are weird you can’t predict anything.

I am with a man that many would consider not good looking but I adore him because of his personality. It doesn’t matter what anyone else thinks.

How rude of your sister! I mean to think things is very different to saying things. What would the world be like if we voiced every thought in our heads?

Looks are important, regardless of what people say. Obviously personality and character are vital, but good looking people get an easier ride initially.

Well you apparently do.

Is your sister a super model? Thought not. Unless your partner is a member of the Hapsburg family I wouldn’t worry!

Yep I agree with @Flufferblub

Also I'm as plain as a brick wall. Gorgeous parents and siblings so it doesn't always follow anyway.

One sibling was utterly stunning but is one of the most wretched people you could meet, with an utterly back soul who is capable of truly awful things. No ethics, no moral compass whatsoever.

Try and want more for your kids than good looks OP, you managed it with your husband. Don't let your sister's shallowness rub off on you.

The misandristic views here are wild.

How can you be so shallow?

Both my parents were/are exceptionally good looking (actor/model). Me and my sister were/are arguably above average but nothing special as are our children.

Some of my in laws are butt ugly but have produced nice looking children. I had an exceptionally good looking friend with really ugly parents.

Believe me looks are very random. Also as others have said, beauty is in the eye of the beholder.