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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Things on MNs that are confusing?

324 replies

ThirtyThrillionThreeTrees · 23/07/2023 20:51

Just curious if anyone else wonders about these things:

  1. DP/DH with super outing hobby - what are these hobbies, naked trampoline tennis?

  2. DP/DH with super stressful job - what is it? Is it a known stressful job or is DP/DP just describing it as that? Anyone ever consider DH is incompetent or has been over promoted?

  3. The notion of a "posh wank" - it doesn't exist, it's a lie told by men caught cheating. Do people really believe it's a real thing?

OP posts:
Deadringer · 23/07/2023 23:32

My dh goes out every night and gets pissed with his mates. He can't get up in the morning and is in danger of losing his job but he shouts at me if I try to get him up. He doesn't engage with the dc, does nothing around the house and spends all of his time at home gaming, or on his phone, and I have caught him texting other women to arrange meet ups.
He is probably depressed

isthisreallyit70 · 23/07/2023 23:33

ThirtyThrillionThreeTrees · 23/07/2023 22:26

It's not a thing. No way, no how. No man does this. There is no logic to it whatsoever. Why on earth would anyone go buy condoms specially for to masterbate or use one for this purpose? It makes no sense at all.

Show quote history

So even though I’m telling you this is a thing, you tell me there isn’t. Are you a man, if not you may not understand the logic. Doesn’t change the fact it’s true

Poppyseed14 · 23/07/2023 23:35

kayserah · 23/07/2023 23:28

I’m not sure about condoms but my friends ex was wanking into nappy bags.

What type of wank would this be I wonder

Show quote history

Bloody hell! Quite a rustly one I'd have thought. How does she know this?!

JMSA · 23/07/2023 23:37

The vast number of posters who have a child with a disability or ASD.
Or who have a disability or ASD themselves. It does seem to be a relatively large proportion.

JMSA · 23/07/2023 23:37

Anonymous20232023 · 23/07/2023 22:06

The answer to every question always seems to be ASD/Autism.

*DH accidentally left the gas on and burnt the house down. He probably has ASD

*should I spend my lotto winnings on a new car? i think you've got autism. Sounds like you r very focused on the car and socially awkward and find it easier to focus on the car than being around people...

*My daughter is nervous about her first day of primary school. You should get her assessed for ASD.

Etc.....

And this!

FatherJackHackettsUnderpantsHamper · 23/07/2023 23:38

That people don't understand that things aren't the same across the UK (I appreciate too there are plenty of non UK Mners). Weather, school holiday dates, school starting ages, house buying systems, how some words are pronounced...

Yes, and that plenty of people call their mid-day meal dinner and their evening meal tea - this is what people with the gift of basic understanding understand as a 'common variation' and not as 'they must be stupid as this is so very obviously WRONG' !

macrowave · 23/07/2023 23:38

The constant diagnosing of complete strangers with eating disorders.

KeepSmiling89 · 23/07/2023 23:39

Can't stop picturing naked trampoline tennis now! 😂wonder what I'll be dreaming about tonight then!

kayserah · 23/07/2023 23:41

Poppyseed14 · 23/07/2023 23:35

Bloody hell! Quite a rustly one I'd have thought. How does she know this?!

Show quote history

I think she found them disposed of when she started wondering where all the nappy bags had disappeared to.

Poppyseed14 · 23/07/2023 23:45

kayserah · 23/07/2023 23:41

I think she found them disposed of when she started wondering where all the nappy bags had disappeared to.

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What a discovery! 🤢🤢

Hopelesscynic · 23/07/2023 23:45

Thepeopleversuswork · 23/07/2023 21:52

@Wheretostartstitching

I am always confused by the ‘How are other people affording luxuries’. The answer is always going to be that they earn more, have less outgoings or getting in debt. Or a mix of 2 or more of these things.

I know those threads are maddening.

OP: "Why do people have more money than me?"
Posters: "Er, they either earn more money or they've inherited money or they have fewer outgoings."

What's not to understand?

Yes right up there with threads titled

  • "How much money do you have in your bank account"
  • "Is this a high earner"
  • "What's your salary"
  • if you salary is X amount, what do you do
MrsAvocet · 23/07/2023 23:54

GoingGoingUp · 23/07/2023 21:59

Because breastfeeding could mean mix of breast and formula, and exclusively breastfeeding is only breastmilk. It can make a difference, depending on the context of the conversation.

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People frequently use the term incorrectly on here though. I fairly often see posters saying things like "I breastfed exclusively for 16 months". No you didn't. Or at least I hope not.
Of course what people mean when they say that is that they didn't use any formula, not that they didn't give their babies any other food or drink which is what exclusive breastfeeding actually means. I never say anything as I know what they're trying to say but it does mildly irritate me.

FatherJackHackettsUnderpantsHamper · 23/07/2023 23:57

Can't stop picturing naked trampoline tennis now!

100% pure Accidental Partridge, that Grin

YabbaDabbaDooooo · 24/07/2023 00:00

So many women on MN have ex partners who don't pay child maintenance.

Yet no-one on MN admits to having a current partner who doesn't.

CeilingFanny · 24/07/2023 00:15

All children are super sporty.

CeilingFanny · 24/07/2023 00:15

They just can’t get enough of it.

Truemilk · 24/07/2023 00:27

That so many posters genuinely suggest hiring a nanny, as if it's a really common everyday thing to do

ilovesooty · 24/07/2023 00:47

RudsyFarmer · 23/07/2023 22:45

If there is they keep awfully quiet don’t they 🤔

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They're pretty vocal.

BinturongsSmellOfPopcorn · 24/07/2023 01:11

"I'm really sorry this post is so enormously long. I'll really, really try to keep it as brief, short and concise as I possibly l can but I want to give every single bit of the background context (including the entire family history of everyone I've ever met, and 4 paragraphs about what I had for breakfast before this happened, which has nothing whatsoever to do with the actual prblem) so I don't risk having to dripfeed because I know that's really annoying...." [Reams more text]. "Gosh, really sorry that's so long but I didn't want to leave anything out."

Well you could have made it a lot shorter by cutting out the disclaimers and apologies.

On reflection, this possibly fits better on the 'Things that give you the rage' thread.

mondaytosunday · 24/07/2023 01:52

That no one drinks. Or only one glass a month. Like who are these people??

Debini · 24/07/2023 02:03

I was surprised when I joined at how many Mumsnetters seem to hate almost all men and will happily tell the OP to LTB for even trivial misdemeanors.

Debini · 24/07/2023 02:05

Truemilk · 24/07/2023 00:27

That so many posters genuinely suggest hiring a nanny, as if it's a really common everyday thing to do

Professional sleep trainers too, never heard of them before joining MN.

neilyoungismyhero · 24/07/2023 02:19

Also I read a lot about dreadful husband's being great dad's and their saving grace is that they put the bins out.

Riapia · 24/07/2023 05:35

In MN land if your DP looks in the direction of another woman he is definitely perving.
You should LTB immediately.

crazyaboutcats · 24/07/2023 05:41

MrsMarieMopps · 23/07/2023 21:55

I find the whole sequence of life events on mumsnet weird. So you have to get to a professional level in your career, buy a house and pay off so much of the equity that you can go part time after maternity leave, marry a man who does 50% around the house, equal number of drop off and pick ups but also earns enough to fully support you going part time. But even going part time he must do 50% of everything. If he doesn't then you must LTB and be a single mum but you can't claim benefits or take a career break. Then if you moan that you're struggling you can be sure that someone will be along to tell you that you should have chosen a better person to have children with. Basically, don't ever be a single mum but never settle for less than perfection in a relationship.
Oh and when you are a single mum you must never date again. Ever.

You've got it in one

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