To not want to collect friend to come round my house

[brock00to]

My friend wants to come and visit my family on Tuesday but she doesn’t drive which means I will have to drive to her house, collect her, drive back to mine and when we’re done I’ll have to drop her off and come back to mine again, so that’s 4 journeys for me. It’s only 6 miles but it’s a bit annoying.

Then say no

Well if I wanted to see my friend and thought I might have a nice time then I would just do it without turning it into a major drama.

But if you don’t think either of those things, then you don’t have to do it 🤷🏻‍♀️

6 miles? Hardly a trek but if you don't want to see her then I guess YNBU

Can't she get a taxi?

Why not pick her up but ask her to take a taxi/Uber home, that way you can have a drink.

Is there no public transport to your house?

Why do you need to pick her up and drop her off?

Would it be unreasonable of me to ask her if she’s getting the bus? I’m 99% sure she’s just assuming I’m collecting her

Say do you mind getting bus here and I’ll drop you back?

She sounds a bit useless if she can't travel that far. I am assuming she isn't disabled or some other relevant factor. Not having a car doesn't mean other people become your personal taxi

That would only take her an hour and a half to walk to yours and then you take her home.

Or a bus there and you run her home?

I don’t drive and wouldn’t expect a lift. Why can’t she use the bus or a taxi?

Ask her to make her own way and you’ll drop her home. That’s what I’d do.

Is this something you’ve done before for her?

How old is she?

No, then you can't have a drink. Pick her up (if you must) but she can get a cab back.

The plan was for her to come round for a bit and then we drive over to the pub near her end so I was expecting to take her home anyway.

Is there a good public transport system? I live rurally in a EU country and during the school holidays there are no buses, during term time there are two a day to coincide with start and end of school.

Could you agree to collect her and then she gets a taxi home? Or could you meet at her house, only two journeys and she hosts.

Maybe she doesn’t want a drink 😂

Just message and say, "Looking forward to seeing you on Tuesday. What time will you be getting here?"

If there is a bus and she doesn't have a disability then it is not unreasonable to expect her to use the bus. If she doesn't drive surely she's used to that.
If she will ge staying late and public transport isn't running or she doesn't feel safe using it at night then it would be a friendly gesture to offer to drop her back but obviously if alcohol will be involved then she can get a taxi.

Has this happened before OP, has a precedent been set because you've picked her up in the past? I don't drive but would never expect to be picked up and dropped off like this so just wondering why you think she's assuming you'll fetch her?

In the arrangements, wouldn’t you just say ‘Great, what time shall I expect you/what time will you get here?’

Has she actually asked for a lift? When I didn't drive I would never have expected my friends to pick me up and drop me off - I would have got the bus and a taxi home.

If you're planning to end up at a pub near her then surely it would be more logical for you to go to her house?

‘Great, I’ll see you when you get here. Don’t worry about bust times for the way back, I’ll run you home’.

Compromise?

If friends wants to see OP's family then makes sense to come to OP's house. Then the two of them go to the pub on the way back.