Family holiday. How should the costs be split?

[Sallyrush]

3 families looking to hire a Villa. (Siblings. Not sure if relevant or not)
2 families are 2 adults and 2 kids, other family is 1 adult, 2 kids.
Families 1 & 2 (2 adults, 2 kids each) think Villa should be split per family.
Family 3 (1 adult, 2 kids) thinks the cost should be split per person, their reason being they have 1 salary to pay for the holiday, other families have 2 - all adults work full time.
Families 1 & 2 feel they all use same facilities so it’s per family.
Family 3 would also like to split costs like food per person but other families think this is petty.
who is right?
YANBU. Families 1 & 2 are correct. Split per family
YABU Family 3 is correct. Cost split per person

The family of one parent is right.
It may seem petty to the two other families but we are in a COL crisis and money may be tighter for the single parent family.
The fact they have voiced this obviously means it's important and significant to them. If they were happy with the other plan, they would have just gone along with it.

The food should be split by person, the accommodation by rooms used.

Can I just say that you are insane to consider a holiday like this. Too many people stuffed into a small space, too many possible arguments. The cost is already an issue, what happens when one kid gets everything in the house then parents refuses to replace it? What happens when one kid annoys the crap out of everyone, the other kids won’t play with them and the parents tell the other kids off for being mean?

For the love of god, get separate small villas in the same park. You might think it costs more, but you will end up saving a lot of money and stress.

How many rooms will each family use?

The food should be split separately and per person. Unless someone has expensive food requirements or prefers a lot of extras, in which they should then opt out of split food and pay for their own.

Are all the bedrooms the same size or will single parent be squished into the smallest room? And who’s deciding that?

I’ve had a bum deal previously and had a delightful ‘holiday’ in what was effectively a storage cupboard.

Which family are you?

We regularly go on holiday with family of up to 18 of us! We calculate bills cost per adult ( don’t count kids) Ditto food etc Get the Splitwise app. You can put in all your expenses - supermarket shop, buying coffees, meals out etc and it splits the bill according to number of people. We always get a villa with more bedrooms as sometimes the older kids want their own room or another family member decides to come! We always have a great time and don’t fuss about the bills - even the non drinkers or those without teenagers or whatever. We all know the score before we agree to go.

When we all go away the holiday house cost is split between 4 families equally..the rest we all dive in with food mix and match and nobody cares who eats what drinks what

I think you go with what would feel morally right. The one parent family should not obviously pay the same as the couples, particularly if they are not as well off. How will food etc be split? Who selects which rooms?
My advice is I’ve gone on two of these, never again!!

Bedrooms are not an issue. Villa has 7 bedrooms in total so plenty of space.
no family will be squashed in.
Families generally get on very well. Cousins love spending time together and will most likely share rooms.
Family 3 also proposed splitting cost per adults but families 1 and 2 think this isn’t fair, hence the next suggestion of cost per person from Family 3.

Families 1/2 are right - splitting it by a third each is fair if everyone’s getting a decent room and there’s no other issues

I'd split accommodation per room and food per person. If the single parent has less resources it's not fair they're subsiding food for the other adults.

Accommodation should be split per room. If the single parent went on holiday with only her children she'd still have to pay for the accommodation she and her family uses.

Why should the other families have to cover her costs? If each family takes two rooms (one for the adults, one for the two children sharing, it's irrelevant that she's a single parent - everyone is getting the same deal).

We had a similar situation when booking a big family holiday this year. Two couples, one single person and one family of 4 (two adults, 2 children). The single person was adamant it should be per person, even though she was getting exactly the same as the other couples. The family of 4 were more than happy to pay for two rooms, as this was the space they needed.

It would be fairer to do food per person, although maybe a little bit petty.

We would always split the cost per adult.

Forget its a holiday for a moment. If this was a trip out to say legoland would you expect the single parent family to cover a 3rd of the total costs or would you pay per person? 🤔

Per person is fair. We count each adult as 1 person, each child as half (unless they're strapping teens eating all day)

So Family 1 pay for 3 places (37.5%)
Family 2 pay for 3 places (37.5%)
Family 3 pay for 2 places (25%)

I think Family 1 and 2 are massively underestimating how difficult it is to support children on a single salary.

I agree accommodation should be per room. But food and other expenses per person .

Per adult or if you really must per person with consideration given to the age of the children.

But the 1 adult family won’t get the nice rooms, will they? That family always ends up with less room ‘because there are fewer of them’.

We sometimes go on holiday with a 1 adult 2 children family and we pay for all the accommodation because, yes, the 1 adult family has less. It’s not an obligation but if there is a disparity in income, wouldn’t that just be nicer? You don’t have to though. I am assuming you are in a 2,2 family).

Just to reiterate rooms aren’t an issue. 7 rooms, kids will share with each other and single parent will have same standard as the couples.

Why can't families 1&2 support family 3, who is already parenting alone? Of course the same amount of rooms are required but family 3 literally has half their income.

It seems families 1&2 are happy to stand together against a sibling and this would make me question if this holiday is really going to work 😥

Neither of you are wrong. Just coming from different view points.

Can family 1&2 afford to compromise slightly and offer family 3 a slight discount? It would be kind of they could.

Accommodation split three ways as each family will be getting the same number/standard of rooms.
Food split per person assuming the children are of similar ages.

family 3 is correct.
the single parent paying the same as what 2 adults would pay means they are essentially paying more for the same thing.

Per person or per adult split is fairest. Each person/adult is benefitting from the house and facilities 24/7, not just during the night-time hours, so it feels fairer.

Otherwise one person in each couple is getting a free holiday as far as accommodation is concerned.

If it's causing this much angst before you've stepped foot on the plane I'd not go.

Are you number 3?

Cost should be split 4/4/3. Otherwise the single parent is subsidising the other two families who already have (say roughly double) household income already.