People are announcing my baby’s birth

[Gotthekeeys]

Would this annoy you?

I had a difficult birth and we told our parents they baby was here safely. Before I was even compos mentis MIL had announced it on the wider family WhatsApp group that I am in and included it ended in a c section.

AIBU to be very pissed off?

Because nobody really cares about the news, that’s why it’s not worth getting frustrated about it. It’s largely irrelevant to most people

If it's so 'irrelevant' then why does she need to bother sharing it? Of course it is not irrelevant to other family members. This is about OP and her feelings, she has just given birth and MIL should have checked before sharing, in my opinion.

Agree.

YABU. They’re here safe, enjoy it.

Completely over reaction @bussteward . It’s normal for people to discuss how the mother is , yea , all fine , good labour , or CS ,with family . No one is asking did she shit or poo herself or how many stitches or did she projectile all over herself.! I mean , who would bloody want to know !!

I’m on a few WhatsApp groups & when I read messages ..so & so has had baby…I just acknowledge the news but couldn’t care less about whether it was c section or not or how much baby weighed or how long birth was. It’s really not important to most people

My sister put it on Facebook (I don’t use Facebook). I was furious at the time but now I look back I wish I hadn’t given it headspace.

I was never going to tell these people face to face so what does it really matter in the grand scheme of things, she’s saved you a job!

Enjoy these magical first few days, don’t ruin them with something that doesn’t matter really!

Nice that she's excited enough to announce it, it could be worse she might not give a shit.
Also, saves you telling the world and his dog 😃

I think it’s relevant for people to know because you’ll need a different kind of consideration and care after the baby is born. For example, you can’t drive for six weeks so they may offer to bring shopping for that time time etc.
It’s close family on a WhatsApp group who have been told you’ve had major abdominal surgery. I think it’s important for them to be aware.

Totally normal behavior from an excited mil in my opinion. This whole thing of "announcements" drives me crazy. People are always happy and excited to hear about a new baby and like to share a bit of good news. I remember years ago when I was a child our neighbour coming knocking on our door to tell my mum her DD had given birth.

Yanbu.

I think it is for the parents to announce/tell unless they both decide it’s ok for someone else.

Don’t think that’s a hard concept. I understand being excited but if it’s not your baby, leave it to the parents to do so when they want to.

This. Mind you all the family grandparents, siblings, in laws, were in waiting room when I was having my 2. I had a GA for the first one & emergency for the second. The whole family were just so relieved that we both made it out alive. As was I. They came in as soon as allowed also. I was at my SILS & my sister’s labours. They all had normal births.

I don’t get the being offended at every little thing the youngsters (anyone under 45😁) get her up about!

congratulations on your new baby.

OP, I’ve been in your shoes. You are not being unreasonable. Having an emergency c-section (I’m gathering by ‘ended’ it was unplanned) can leave you feeling so vulnerable. I fundamentally disagree with a PP who said that feeling ashamed is an unusual reaction, it is not. However OP hasn’t indicated that at all. It’s more likely she’s feeling vulnerable and feels that she should have had control over who knew what about the birth she’s just been through. I find it so strange that people think they are entitled to your personal info just because it involves the birth of a baby. I found my SIL asking me if my DDs birth was ‘normal or c-section’ so bloody intrusive and my FIL threw a right hissy fit when he thought he wasn’t first to know baby had been born (he was but missed the notification). People behave strangely at this time but it shouldn’t be at your expense and sometimes they need reminding of that.
Hope you and baby are doing well this morning.

If its in a family WhatsApp group I wouldn't be annoyed... everyone just wants to know everything is ok with their family members? I find it weird that it annoyed you.

I'd be cross if it was posted on social media or it was a pregnancy announcement.

I would think it was odd if they didn’t share.

Now is the time to sort out your social media policy for the baby. We had to spend the first month telling people.not to add photos to social media. It eventually stuck. Lots of "oh that's awful, now I can't show off about my nephew" compo faces but I'm glad we stuck with it.

Reading this thread has made me laugh.

Anyone would think your a celebrity.

Make sure security is tight, use hospital underground and avoid paps like wildfire. Be a media frenzy

If you asked her not to tell anyone else then you're right to be pissed off. If not, not.

You don’t have to be a celebrity to want to announce the birth of your own baby.

The while celebrity comparison is ridiculous.

Some people don’t mind someone else telling their news, some people do. Neither is wrong, but what is wrong is telling those who do mind is that they’re wrong or “precious” for wanting to announce themselves vs another family member doing so. Why can’t both be respected?

@phoenixrosehere

They will find out in the end. Not saying is pretty disrespectful to those wanting to wish you well, sat waiting for news.

It isnt a secret the OP obviously announced she was pregnant and due at a certain time. So what's wrong with confirming that all went went.

MN is so weird sometimes. Family WhatsApp isn’t that what stuff like this is for?? Mine & dhs siblings would have not been happy to wait for the news to be shared. Tbh nor would I have been in those circumstances either!

I would be annoyed if it was announced on twitter/Facebook/instagram by someone else and I would be a tiny bit annoyed if it was announced in a WhatsApp group me and the dad were also in, but not when people announce it to each other through private channels, I think that’s totally normal.
congrats!

DH's step mum announced it on Facebook when I was still very unwell in the high dependency unit. I was fuming when I found out afterwards! So I can see why you are upset, it's your news to share!

Also, I don’t understand why people feel the need to write “by Caesarian section”. Or the baby’s weight for that matter. These are private details IMO.
it’s not like you ever get “delivered by the vag” 😂

There’s nothing wrong with confirming it, but it is for the parents to decide who, when, what and how they want to tell.

Also, I don’t agree it’s disrespectful for those wanting to know to have to wait. It’s a birth announcement, not a food order. They are not entitled to know asap.