To ask what the rudest thing your child has said to you in a melt down?

[DrSeuss84]

Tonight my very hormonal, 12 year old, pre teen told me to “shove off” when I made a joke about her playing with Lego instead of tidying her room. Quickly followed up with “you ruin everything”. It took me back a bit to be honest. It was completely out of character. It got me wondering 2 things:

1. is this normal teenage behaviour? Or is my child suddenly going off the rails?

2. what’s the worst thing your child has said in a rage.

7 year old screamed I'm not her real mum and daddy is ugly. Only one is true

Just to add, i still have to care for my autistic ds, even though he's 21, but thankfully he doesn't 'meltdown' anymore.

What I find far more disturbing is the current prevalence of 'meltdowns' happening with NT kids; there's more than the one I have next door.

My DD is 7 and when she's tired or not getting her own way she can help meltdowns, some of the stuff includes' I want you to die' 'i wish I had a different mother' ' this is the worst day' 'your not the boss of me' 'im telling your mother on you' ' I want a new family' this are then often followed with ' your the best mummy' 'im sorry I was hangry' ' I want you to live forever' ' you can have a 1000 hugs today' ' I love you the mostest'

I have started to remove the tablet for rudeness now as it was becoming a bit too frequent for my liking

My DS 15 told me during a meltdown that I am going bald.

He never swears at me , so to express his frustration he does come out with some very random comments .

Weren't you a tiny bit tempted to say are you sure about that one. If he knew what it meant that would have thrown him off kilter for sure. 😁

Karen

She regretted it when I sat her down and made her listen to my tirade
have a discussion about why Karen is a way of silencing women over a certain age from having an opinion.

Jeez - rearing children isn't for the faint hearted is it??

I have three kids My eldedt girl is constantly cheeky.
But the nastiest remark came from youngest - my normally very sweet tiny for his age little boy. A few weeks ago we were rushing out and I was yelling at him to go get into the car. He snapped back - " you go kill yourself"

I feel terrible guilt - myself and their father are married but its been a loveless marriage for a very long time with a lot or arguing.

My asd 5 year old - "Mummy! I will call you a fuck tractor!"

Because he didn't get a 33k John Deere tractor for a casual Wednesday treat, even though he'd requested it several hours earlier.

I'm such a mean fuck tractor 🙄

@debbs77 I understand how you must be feeling really rejected and confused by that at the minute but it is no reflection on you. I also went to live (temporarily I might add) with my 'real' dad aged 17 and it was more to connect with him and make up for lost time than anything else. It is in no way a reflection of you or your parenting so please don't worry about that. She will come back to you when she's ready (whether living with you or emotionally etc).

NT teenagers/children/adults can have meltdowns too though.

As a parent of a child with ASD and as a person who has worked with many children who are NT or ND, can we please not change the definition of meltdown just because our children who are ND experience them more often and with greater severity?

It doesn’t help to facilitate inclusivity if we become arsey with other parents using the word meltdown in relation to their NT child/ren. They are allowed to use the word meltdown. It is not exclusive to ND children.

Definition of Meltdown

meltdown1 of 2nounmelt·down ˈmelt-ˌdau̇n

1: the accidental melting of the core of a nuclear reactor

2 : a rapid or disastrous decline or collapse

3 : breakdown of self-control (as from fatigue or overstimulation)

https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/meltdown

ASD, ADHD and a genetic condition.

Fucking Cuntbadger
Are you not dead yet

He's 16 now, those phrases were just as the meltdowns began when he was younger. Meltdowns now are more just screaming and crying in a corner while he hits himself and bangs his head off our concrete wall. Much preferred the "insults".

I'm so sorry @StJulian2023, that sounds really tough

Except you wouldn’t though, would you?

There’s no need for kudos, parenting children isn’t a choice, SEN or not, it’s just being a mother.

Reading through this thread, can you see any examples of a genuine meltdown from parents talking about their NT children?

Actually my nearly 6 year has recently started calling me names etc. Last week she did have a meltdown on a school trip shouting at the teacher that "she hates her" and "doesn't want to be in her class". The way it was described was like a meltdown because she is tired and not coping with the end of term. Not sure why young children of that age with autism can't have a meltdown.

*without

This is really quite patronising. You are also implying that our autistic children are that awful they should be put into care.

My son regularly wishes me dead, tells me nobody would miss me, I’ve never been loved. It’s water off a dicks back to be honest as I know he doesn’t mean it. It doesn’t make me love him less or not want to be his Mum.

if that was a sincere comment, it’s really sad for you and any kids you have.

They can and what pp said is correct, it’s not a term exclusive to autism. However, it’s now recognised and widely used in that context and as you can see from this thread, a meltdown for a child with ASD is very different from what you are describing and when it gets used like that it makes it difficult for ASD parents to convey what a meltdown is for their child.

That is hilarious 😂😂😂 how did you keep a straight face in that moment?

'You are NOT my best friend anymore!' And my personal favourite'I'm not playing with you ever again'!

Me (singing along to Pink): “So what, I’m still a rockstar…”

DS: You’re not though, are you? You’re an English teacher in a small town high school. That’s about as far from being a rockstar as it’s possible to be.

Ouch.

One of mine said they'd kill me or themselves. No one likes me and I have no friends 🤷‍♀️. But that comes with lots of MH issues.

My 5 year old granddaughter FaceTimed me in the midst of a huge sobfest - I had been pre-warned by my daughter that this was incoming 🤣

Between the HUGE snotty sobs she said: Nanny, can I come and live with you now please because I don't love mummy and daddy anymore! I HATE them to THE MOON!

The reason for the drama, snot, tears and new home request? She wasn't allowed to play on the trampoline in the rain 🤷‍♀️ It had been a long week, she was getting over a very bad dose of chicken pox and mummy had been away with work for three days...but still, the drama! 🤣

I would actually struggle not to laugh at that