to think my friend isn’t actually a lone parent?!

[butterlo]

My friend describes herself as a lone parent and whilst her dd doesn’t see her dad so obviously she has no practical help, she has hundreds a month from her ex which means she has more flexibility than me… who I consider is a real lone parent. No contact with the father and has never paid a penny! Surely that’s the definition of a lone parent, not someone who has significant financial input for their child?!

What you are trying to state is that you consider a lone parent who doesn't get financial support aswel? I know it's frustrating that you are not get financial support from your child's father however it's not a competition and a lone parent is a parent doing it alone

It’s not a competition..

It makes you a lone parent with less money.

If it's not the ex it could be her parents sending her money every month. She still makes decisions on her own and has the full responsibility of care.

Stop being bitter.

You must be going through a rough time being a lone parent plus having no financial support - I really feel for you. I’m sure you’re doing the best you can and that you are a brilliant parent.

However, I think your attitude towards your friend is jealous based. Money doesn’t make you any less of a lone parent. Just as others have commented, having money left by your spouse doesn’t mean you struggle less mentally than someone who is a widow with less money.

You are both lone parents and both have struggles.

Sending money isn’t what I would call parenting. Parenting is being there for your children, going to their parents evenings, making sure they go to school, feeding them, being present in their lives, making them feel loved etc etc. Having some money transferred to your account every month doesn’t qualify as parenting in my books.

Yabvu. No doubt the extra will help to ease the burden but the lone parent still bears full responsibility for everything else. Don't take it out on friend.
Support each other

The pp isn't being bitter so stop insulting others, she probably struggling at the moment and would love at least financial support from her child's father.

Not all Lone Parents need to hard done by to they to qualify as a lone parent.

Be pleased her child has a more opportunities perhaps.
Jealousy is such a wasted emotion I do not get it.

You’re both lone parents, she has more money. Money doesn’t help with changing the bed sheets at 3am when one of the kids has a bug and has puked. Money doesn’t help get the kids shoes on faster in the morning when you’re running late or stop them fighting in the car. Whilst she might have a better lifestyle in terms of material things, it doesn’t help with the vast majority of problems that being a single parent brings.

To me a lone parent is someone who parents majority of the time alone. Even if someone has the day off every second Saturday they’re still a lone parent in my eyes. Money doesn’t make you feel less alone.

You’re both lone parents.

But you definitely have it worse than she does.

You won't like to hear this but I know plenty of women whose millionaire partners give them as much as they need but they're still very much lone parents. They spend their entire days alone with a small child (or children) and do every single night waking, sickness, pick up, drop off etc. They are unhappy and exhausted and have no delight in showing off the physical things they can afford.

Money is no substitute for the physical presence and help of another person (incidentally the wealthier a man is, the more likely they are to throw money at the problem because it costs them nothing in time).

This is on your child's dad not your friend and her situation you are just bitter and that's on you. Seriously have a word with yourself.

My friend describes her as a single parent when her ex offers as much support as he can and sees DC as much as she’s allowed.

I think there’s a big difference between separated parents and single/lone parents, the two are often blurred together.

Surely that’s the definition of a lone parent, not someone who has significant financial input for their child?!

No. You just described 2 of many possible situations that a lone parent could be facing.

So a lone parent on 60k a year isn't really a lone parent then according to you op?even if they're a widow. Being a lone parent has nothing to do with income. Being jealous of friends is not a good look. Focus on improving your own financial situation. Your friends income is not your business.

YABU. I'm a lone parent who gets child maintenance. Stop this race to the bottom.

Jealous much?

Sending money definitely does help though so people should be grateful that their child/children father sends them money I'm not stating £30 pounds a month or some unreasonable amount like this. Some people get £200 pounds or more a month for just one child and also get weekends/holidays over night stays but still state it isn't good enough 🫣

Of course she’s a lone parent. It’s her doing it all by herself. Yes, she may get maintenance but she’s still alone is she not?

Is that how we describe men contributing financially to their children now?

You're both lone parents. Money doesn't change that.

Ahhh I forgot, when you have money you’re not a lone parent.

what a stupid interpretation op.