Skinny shaming

[Bobski123]

I was doing some moving and handling training for part of my job. The trainer required a volunteer, I offered and she said "Oh no not you, you're far too skinny."
She then chose a larger lady.
I get it's supposed to be some sort of compliment because being thin is 'desirable'.
However if she'd said "Not you, you're far too fat." She'd possibly be out of a job by now.
However it's ok to say the opposite.
I should've responded really.
It's like that meme going around with a picture of Sophia Loren and the caption "I'd rather eat pizza and drink wine than be a size 0."
A few of my colleagues posted it and I just think, yawn. They aren't mutually exclusive, ok, size 0 is very small but the point is you can enjoy pizza, wine whatever and still remain slim. I'm just over it.

I'm with you OP. I'm called skinny yet would be killed if I called someone fat!

Being thin is the beauty standard, being fat is not.

No, being thin - with "adequate" tits and ass is the beauty standard.

Men and women both apparently feel fully entitled to comment if your tits and ass don't meet their "adequate" to consider you "feminine".

It is, to me, a bit like white privilege or male privilege. (I have the first but not the second)

When you are white you don't realise the challenges facing non white people

When you are male, you don't realise the challenges women face

When you have only ever been slim you don't realise the challenges overweight people face

I've been slim and I've been very overweight. I've had negative comments when slim but nothing like the judgement and negativity I have got from men, women, medical people and just in general I got when I was big.

It's not nice, none of us has the right to judge others (walk a mile in my shoes) but I can pretty well guarantee that the comments you get are either jealousy or an acknowledgement that you don't have the issues (both living and judging) that overweight people do. Especially those who are very overweight.

Yep,I get to have "eat something" shouted at me while not being able to point out that the man's main reference is a clinically obese woman.

Well, someone with no manners or decency would have pointed it out; so I get to have those, while he has none.

Quite ironic that the point of this thread is to condemn making personal and negative comments about someone's size, and yet here we are, a couple of pages in, and lots of posters arguing over which dress size makes a woman 'fat'. Nicely done 👏

Thanks. I train pretty hard (compound lifts 3x a week) but I think I'm naturally strong too tbh. I never realised until I started deadlifting and squatting.

Here's a pic from last gym sesh just in case people think I'm fibbing. 😂

I’m not making a personal comment. It is objective fact.

I don’t think it’s a coincidence that the posters arguing that ‘skinny’ people should just shut up and take it on the chin are also those passing judgement over what dress size officially makes you ‘fat’.

It frustrates me that so many women think lifting heavy weights will make you bulky. In reality, being sedentary is more likely to have this effect IME. We just don't have enough testosterone to get jacked like men do.

Fair do’s!

I’ve only recently recently started lifting weights of any size and really struggle with the motion of deadlifts (keep dropping into a squat) but would love to do a proper journey and make real progress.

Not sure I’d ever have a 140kg deadlift in me though!

I don’t think I did do that, though?

I commented that motivations for the comments differed, not that it is fine and dandy to tell people to eat more/less etc whilst they’re going about their day, just existing.

I naively went toy then workplace's gym and asked for a routine to help me (dinghy) sail but that I didn't want to get too bulky/muscly; the trainer laughed (in a kind way) and said that if I are chicken all day, slept 22 hours, and did weights non stop; if he lucky if I got remotely bulky.

*I'd be

12 hours, not 22 hours lol

Even for men I believe that cutting & getting definition is easier than bulking.

They tend to use barely legal "supplements" to really bulk and those have health risks.

Different cues seem to work for different people but for me it really helped to think about 'pushing the floor away'. If I focused on pulling I tended to use too much of my lower back (dangerous and technically inefficient).

I use the trap/hex bar a lot too. It's a more squatty movement but carries many of the same benefits as conventional DL. Rack pulls can be a good introduction too (basically pulling in the power cage/squat rack, using the pins to set bar's starting position slightly higher off the ground).

I get it OP.
I used to get these kind of comments all the time. Just genetics, I was the skinny kid. Nothing to do with how or what I ate. Constant comments how I should eat more and why a massive dinner wasn't finished.

I noticed that nobody ever said to others to put thier fork down, ( we are talking really obese people) I realise that sounds horrible but is how it was. Don't get why it's okay to comment on someone deemed 'skinny' and not allowed to comment on others if they have done the same. It's offensive. Im no longer the skinny kid 2 babys and age but would never think this okay.

I've endured this my whole life, OP. I was once told I was 'fair game' for negative comments because I'm 'lucky enough to wake up every morning a Size 10'. Yes REALLY!

At the end of the day, OP, I know I can change my body shape. But those people will always be ignorant! 🤷🏼‍♀️

Yes I do get it. Ok to call a slim person skinny but not ok to call an overweight person fat. Neither is acceptable. Just rude.

I find they either struggle to put on muscle or to lose weight depending on body type and genetics. I think bulking takes less discipline as you can eat crazy amounts and make progress.

Ah ok, thanks! I’ll give “push the floor away” a go next time. I’m definitely in the “pull it up” headspace usually.

My partner has tried to show me correct form but he has short legs and I have long, so it doesn’t quite work for me visually!

If I’ve conflated your posts with someone else’s, apologies!

Oh no won't somone think of the skinnies!

I'm not quite sure the odd random comment compares to the discrimination fat people face especially medical discrimination. I was fat an can absolutely say it's a thing.

That reminds me of a famous quote by Arnold Schwarzenegger. Somebody allegedly said they'd not want to get quite as big as him and he replied "don't worry, you never will." 😂

Push the floor away and focus on trying to shoot your hips through. Kind of like a pelvic thrust. 👍 Technically called a 'hip hinge'.