Skinny shaming

[Bobski123]

I was doing some moving and handling training for part of my job. The trainer required a volunteer, I offered and she said "Oh no not you, you're far too skinny."
She then chose a larger lady.
I get it's supposed to be some sort of compliment because being thin is 'desirable'.
However if she'd said "Not you, you're far too fat." She'd possibly be out of a job by now.
However it's ok to say the opposite.
I should've responded really.
It's like that meme going around with a picture of Sophia Loren and the caption "I'd rather eat pizza and drink wine than be a size 0."
A few of my colleagues posted it and I just think, yawn. They aren't mutually exclusive, ok, size 0 is very small but the point is you can enjoy pizza, wine whatever and still remain slim. I'm just over it.

Then there's the endless incessant diet talk at every fucking work lunch table and school mum meeting - diets diets diets, which excludes you if you're not on one, and they usually have a slightly sneery attitude to you as well - and observe what you eat.

🙄🙄🙄🙄

It's enough to sit at the men's lunch table (yes, it's so parochial in my region of the UK that the staff usually divide up into male and female tables) .... But then it's football football football instead of diets, diets, diets.

Would you find it pleasant to have some dickhead shouting "eat something" at you at a sporting club??!!

Would you like to have a man, unprovoked, comment in your figure - with a negative overtime at a party??!!

Are you usually this obtuse?

*overtone

I've had similar and I can honestly say, I don't give a flying fuck. You even had to go a bit further and bring their wives' dress sizes up. Weird af.

This.

Don't know why it needs said.

It's not remotely weird as fuck ..... If you don't get why I did that, I repeat, you're incredibly obtuse.

I've had similar and I can honestly say, I don't give a flying fuck

Good for you. Not everybody is like you - especially when they're young.

If it was manual handling training, perhaps they needed someone over a certain weight to actually train people to do it properly? I know those of us who were larger were always approached to be evacuation chair “riders” because they needed to make sure that the volunteers could use the chair for anyone who needed it.

So it might have been practical, not “skinny shaming”.

I think you did it because they are fat and you secretly feel superior but are trying to dress it up as a 'we've lost sight of a healthy weight' thing.

Why? We already understand it's hurtful for fat people to hear comments about it and we understand they can be unhappy and have little confidence in their size.

Same for the very slim. Why must the two be pitted against each other?

This.

Nobody should comment on someone else’s body- end of. I have been ‘skinny’ very underweight (not by choice) and looked awful.

Being called ‘slim’ is preferable to ‘skinny’ any day!

The sizes mentioned aren't fat.

No people shouldn’t comment on the appearance of others. Life would be easier and more pleasant if people didn’t feel entitled to pass comment.

But almost every time, “you’re so skinny” comments come from jealousy, whereas “you’re so fat” comments come from a place of malice.

Being thin is the beauty standard, being fat is not.

God do fat people really think they hold the monopoly on being insulted or having someone be rude about their size?

’bag of bones’
’real men love curves’
’looks like a little boy’
’eat a burger?’
’you must be anorexic’

These are all insulting comments said to purposely be insulting.

She was rude. And I can’t imagine the lady who was chosen to do it felt great about herself either. Since you were all on the course surely anyone who volunteered should have done it.

I don't secretly feel superior to anyone, let alone in weight.

I don't give a fuck what weight people are, I give a fuck what they're like as people.

I do find it irritating and highly inappropriate when men whose partners are clinically obese feel the need to skinny shame a woman in the middle of her heights weight range, with zero provocation or relevance.

Doesn’t really matter, as long as someone makes a nasty comment it’s irrelevant what their personal motivation behind the comment is.

YANBU and I am fat. I do think skinny shaming is just as bad as fat shaming and is usually done by larger women who feel jealous. The whole "fat people are treated worse" is true but that doesn't mean it's fine to comment on thinner bodies to make yourself feel better.

At their height they're clinically overweight/obese ..... That's irrelevant to their character and that's all I'm interested in.

I don't need men whose ideal/standard is clinically obese though - commenting on my weight/figure however.

I'm not asking to be treated preferentially for being thin though, I'm asking for some basic politeness and respect. Some people seem to think that I benefit from preferential treatment and that that somehow gives them a licence to, I don't know, bring me down a peg or two, or something? When all I want is for them to 'be kind', as we're all constantly being ordered to be!

14 'or maybe bigger' and 16-18 aren't fat?

seems that all the more political correctness is being venerated, the more the opposite effect it produces

14 and 16 definitely aren't. 18 may be straying into overweight, but they're not fat, no.