Trans etc at school / all going too far?

[Peverellshire]

AIBU to think that there are a growing number of below 16s identifying as opposite gender?

Incidents in school where pupils called out for not acknowledging ‘Brian is now fully Bryony’. Etc. As example.

AIBU to think that these sensitive discussions and explorations should all be realised, if appropriate, post school, when children are young adults? For many reasons. Pref Pronouns in primary school, ok?

So true

And no wonder why so many young adults have Mh issues.

I agree and think it’s going to smack the students in the face too because what happens when they grow up and realise that actually they’re not transgender.

If this fad was around a few years ago then I would have 100% identified as a boy.
I cut my hair really short, shaved lines in my eyebrow, had all boy friends, played football, tied my breasts down, wore baggy ‘boy’ clothes and didn’t fancy boys.

I was the very typical tomboy and I used to tell people that I want to be a boy as I genuinely did and I felt very uncomfortable being a girl.

But that phase lasted a maximum of 2 years and then I went the opposite and wore very tight clothes with high heels and lots of make up and loved being a girl.

I’m now an adult woman and I’m so glad no one allowed me to say I was a boy and change my name and gender etc.

I think it’s very dangerous as it is putting people into boxes of stereotypes - if you do X, Y, Z it must mean you identify as a boy whereas actually you can be a girl and still enjoy X, Y, Z.
As adults we understand that stereotypes are ridiculous but a child and self conscious teen doesn’t.

I think there's a kink element to it, that children and some parents are not aware of. Furries are about anthropomorphic animals. So animals with human qualities or characteristics.

These kids identifying as cats etc are therians - they identify as a non-human animal. It's a thing on TikTok. I think I read somewhere that therians are more likely than, er, non-therians to suffer from mental illness. Some do it for attention, some do it because they want to belong, but many have other issues going on that has not been addressed or needs that have not been met.

And no wonder why so many young adults have Mh issues

We should be teaching kids resilience and being honest about whats realistic that they can and can't do. Especially the impossible. Being a boy when you are a girl. You can't. Creating this status of victim hood and creating this idea that all the people in their lives , Instead of caring about them are actually the enemy.

Your sexuality/GI should actually be the least interesting thing about them. When adults observe hyper sexuality and an interest in non age appropriate things in a child that should be a red flag for grooming/abuse etc

How do you spot this when kids are now obsessed with defining their sexuality akd their self worth depends on who they are gonna sleep with. I.mean we have normalised getting kids together in groups discussing their love lives at an age its not even appropriate to realky have one. That would have been a huge red flag just a few years ago.

So now that boundary is eroded what has to happen and how bad does it have to he before it registers a kid is behaving inappropriately and that requires observation and/or intervention. And how badly will they be damaged mentally for having to get to that point before anyone noticed

That's a really interesting point. I wonder about the proportion of people identifying as trans across race, class and culture.

The media tends to show mainly young white trans people. Are trans people from other cultures underrepresented in the media or is it not happening to the same degree?

Why don’t we just let kids be kids and identify as they wish? What harm does it do them to experiment with their identities? Why not just respect their adventurous, amazing, creative selves?

If you were to go to grade schools or highschools where the gender binary is strictly enforced, for religious or political reasons, you would see just as much confusion, medication, surgery, coaching etc… but just promulgating a different model of gender. The boys must all lift weights or play sports or otherwise perform a masculine identity and the girls get boob jobs or cosmetic surgery to compete as most feminine.

At least these children are exploring their own desires and identities with the goal being their own happiness.

My 11 year old DD recently told me that she's "gender fluid". She said she first heard of it when they had a talk on gender and trans issues in Year 5 at primary school. Year 5! Aged 10.

She said that's when she realised she was "gender fluid" as she didn't like wearing pink sparkly things like other girls and preferred wearing what was generally thought of as "boys" clothes. Although sometimes she likes to wear dresses. Hence why she's "gender fluid."

10 is too young to introduce such subjects to children IMO. They're way too young to understand the complexities. I'm now trying to get her to understand that being female doesn't mean you need to dress in a certain way, and that she can have her hair cut short and still be a girl.

It's just ridiculous. She's told me I'm violating her if I don't respect her chosen pronouns. Which will change frequently 😳

That is ridiculous isn't it and the criteria they go by isn't very scientific. It's damaging

This! Children are trying Ont identities but the "trans" identity can le dangerous in that it encourages a harmful split between mind & body and this positions the body as the child's "enemy". Whereas, in reality our bodies are ourselves & how we live, and children need help to accept this reality .

Its not as simple aa let kids whatever they want- these lgbtqzbdgsh organisations are trying to get to the kids as early as possible and get them onto puberty blockers and surgical interventions aka breasts removed.

NHS should not fund any of that if they want these things done 18+ and at their own cost. Nhs should offer them councelling only

I think straight white well-off people are more likely to identify as trans because of a narrative that "cis" straight white people are uniquely evil (the idiot's version of intersectionality).

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@Thisismyexperience I’m so sorry your child and you went through this. How are they doing now? Schools have no right to push anything either way in the ‘Ticky inclusivity box’

I teach my children that gender stereotypes are nonsense, that their likes and dislikes and feelings are all part of their unique personality. Liking football doesnt not make them male, it just means they like football.

When asked about what makes them male/female, they cannot answer without referring to gender stereotypes!

I teach them that they cannot change their sex and not to worry themselves about gender as its all bull crap.

I teach them to embrace who they are and be happy in themselves.

This trans trend is regressive, we are back focused on putting people into boxes based on what society thinks they should act like instead of just accepting we are all unique.

I have no doubt there are people who genuinely feel they are in the wrong body but that is a medical condition. The rest are either focused on gender stereotypes, suffering from another mental health condition, confused or attention seeking. We should not be encouraging this.

Let people dress how they want, like who or what they want but respect the fact that you cant change sex.

Thankfully my children's friends are clued in enough to recognize this for the crap it is but I really feel sorry for the younger children as they are growing up being taught this stuff as fact.

My child told me how they felt probably 20 years ago now, so it was long before trans becoming what it is now.

My child was also the first trans pupil in our area, so that's why there was so much pressure, the school absolutely thrived on it, and even advised other schools based in being the 'first' in the area to deal with a trans pupil (despite us not wanting any kind of special treatment or interventions, just literally private toilet and changing). It was just awful.

When my child hit 20, and were still adamant in their feelings (after 5 years of private counselling, and 15 or so years after telling me this was how they felt), they did decide to go down the route of hormones/surgery, fully supported by me.

My child is happy, healthy and thriving, though we homeschooled my child is now doing their second degree, putting themselves through university, working hard and is just a joy. None of that would have happened if the school had their way, they wanted to push interventions that my child wasn't ready for, for their own reasons.

I would, obviously, rather my child didn't feel this way, I would rather they were happy in their own body and didn't have to go through all this to be happy, but, sadly, it didn't figure out that way.

Sometimes it isn't just as easy as "I've told my child toys and clothes don't define gender" so the smugness of some who think that's all you need to do is really irritating. Nothing in my home, with any of my kids, has been gendered, and yet this still happened in my family.

My DD’s school friend has just recently changed school because she spent two years identifying as a boy after watching endless tik tok videos about transgenderism. We all had to call her by a boys name and she would scream at us if we ‘deadnamed’ her. She got to attend a special club at school for trans kids.

Two years later she says it’s all been a big mistake and has gone out of her way to look like a girl again and desperately wants a boyfriend. But all the boys considered her an attention seeking weirdo. So she’s changed schools for a fresh start as she now says she’s completely embarrassed by the whole episode.

Meanwhile, two other girls who used to identify as boys are now apparently identifying as cats.

My concern is that identity disorders need to be dealt with gently and with a great deal of expertise. I don’t think school is the best place for this. Social transition is not a neutral act and teachers are not psychologists. In addition to this situations like the sexual assaults in the Essex school will arise, clearly putting girls at risk. I can’t see how schools and teachers are supposed to manage this well.

My concern is that identity disorders need to be dealt with gently and with a great deal of expertise. I don’t think school is the best place for this. Social transition is not a neutral act and teachers are not psychologists.

100% agree with this. Reading stories of detransitioners who have made permanent changes to their bodies/their health, that they then regret, are heartbreaking.

These children were cheered on by people who may have meant well, but had absolutely no clue what they were doing.

If you think using the pronouns, etc is a neutral act, and you'd comply, then you have to comply with and defend the man 'breastfeeding' his newborn baby.

You can't just take a bite of this ideology, you gotta eat the whole thing.

I'm not sure this is the case - there was some evidence on the FWB forum that autistic girls in care and from chaotic, deprived backgrounds were more likely to identify as trans than any other group. I'll see if I can find the thread.

This.

It's also exceptionally disturbing that young girls are desperate to escape womanhood, but not surprising.

Apparently though teenagers seem to have shifted from it being the great next big thing to considering it "lame" and attention seeking.

I suspect that if anyone is going to bring the reign of gender ideology to an abrupt close it's going to be kids beginning to see it as boring. It's not something that will survive without regular affirmation.

I suspect that if anyone is going to bring the reign of gender ideology to an abrupt close it's going to be kids beginning to see it as boring.

That. And lawsuits.

Those of you who are saying it’s about gender stereotypes- that seems like oversimplifying to me. Would you really be happy to have the genitalia and physical body of the opposite sex, if you could continue to live exactly as you are?

I personally wouldn’t be happy as a cis woman to have a penis, a man’s voice, etc. Because I feel like a woman, independently of my personality, interests, what I wear.

Ds2 is Yr 9, there are quite a few trans. Worrying that there are so many within one school year.